Does this qualify as blackmail?

[Willlyjo]

fstep2 said: "So I went out with this guy, we weren't clicking. . . "

Where does it say that the guy "invited" fstep on a "first date?" You are assuming this was a first date and that the guy purchased for fstep both drinks and tickets for this date (and provided taxi transportation).

What if this guy was able to get a good price on tickets and fstep said, "Great. Pick a ticket up for me and I'll pay you back," and they decided to go to the play/movie/ball game/whatever together and split the cost of a taxi?

And where do the photos come in that are going to be doctored? What kind of photos? How did the guy get them?

Seriously, you and others have made assumptions that may or may not accurately reflect the facts.

There is just too much that is NOT known to give any definitive answers here. There IS enough information to say that fstep can probably pay the guy half of the costs incurred, as he has demanded, to avoid future problems. That appears to be the most mature action to take to resolve the issue and avoid doctored photos and potentially costly legal actions (which may or may not be winnable, depending on all sorts of facts and factors not disclosed to us here).

The problem with you is, Exhibit A (this thread), you give advice for something that rarely happens (and is not indicative in this thread) as opposed to something that seems pretty apparent like the OP walking out on a date, who provided the expenses (like MOST MEN PROVIDE). You tried to downplay your terrible advice that the OP should pay for half of the expenses, by mentioning in a subsequent post that she would be liable if there were some kind of an agreement between the pair.

In most cases, when a couple go out on a date, the man usually is the one who initiates the event by asking the woman out. Sometimes, it is the woman, who will ask the man out, but rarely, is there any agreements or a verbal contract imposed as part of a dating relationship.

Also, I'm pretty sure that if the OP were liable for any agreement based expenses, she would have mentioned that in this thread. Otherwise, according to the norm, it is the guy who asked her out, who provided the expenses.

I guess your posts tell me quite a bit about your dating habits, Quincy. Or...the lack thereof, during your much earlier years.

 

[cbg]

Please post a link to the law that says the man is responsible for all payment and in all circumstances.

Oh, there isn't such a law?

Then what is your legal basis for stating that the guy is UNQUESTIONABLY responsible for all costs, pray tell?

 

[ecmst12]

What if they're both guys?

 

[quincy]

The problem with you is, Exhibit A (this thread), you give advice for something that rarely happens (and is not indicative in this thread) as opposed to something that seems pretty apparent like the OP walking out on a date, who provided the expenses (like MOST MEN PROVIDE). You tried to downplay your terrible advice that the OP should pay for half of the expenses, by mentioning in a subsequent post that she would be liable if there were some kind of an agreement between the pair.

In most cases, when a couple go out on a date, the man usually is the one who initiates the event by asking the woman out. Sometimes, it is the woman, who will ask the man out, but rarely, is there any agreements or a verbal contract imposed as part of a dating relationship.

Also, I'm pretty sure that if the OP were liable for any agreement based expenses, she would have mentioned that in this thread. Otherwise, according to the norm, it is the guy who asked her out, who provided the expenses.

I guess your posts tell me quite a bit about your dating habits, Quincy. Or...the lack thereof, during your much earlier years.

Assumptions such as the ones you are making here, Willly, have no place in the law or on a legal forum or, in fact, in modern life.

I seriously suggest that, instead of continuing to post drivel on this forum, you spend whatever time you have becoming educated.

 

[Proserpina]

What if they're both guys?

Shhh. You'll blow Willlyjo's mind.

 

[Willlyjo]

What photos?

You really have no legal recourse unless or until the guy you ditched doctors photos of you and publishes them online*. The mature thing to do is pay for your half of the date ($52), apologize to the guy, and your problem is solved for far less than it will cost you to consult with an attorney on the matter (although consulting with an attorney in your area is always an option).


*edit to add: Any legal action possible would depend on how the photos were doctored and where they were published - drawing a mustache and glasses on your photo and sticking the photos on a Facebook page would not support a suit.

Hmmmm...isn't assuming that the OP should pay for her part of the date exactly the type of assumption that you say has no place in this forum?

Also, I hardly think you're intelligent enough to warrant your display of condenscending behavior toward me in this thread. There are others like myself who disagree with you in this thread, so apparrently, you are not always right.

 

[Willlyjo]

Please post a link to the law that says the man is responsible for all payment and in all circumstances.

Oh, there isn't such a law?

Then what is your legal basis for stating that the guy is UNQUESTIONABLY responsible for all costs, pray tell?

Who said anything about there being a law saying a man HAS TO or is responsible for expenses while on a date? I simply stated that in this thread, it appears that the man who took the OP out, paid expenses voluntarily (as most men do that I've ever been aware of), and based on that and the fact the Op never mentioned anything about any agreements to got "dutch", the OP IS NOT liable for half the costs. BTW...there would be many men without dates if they suggested that the ladies pay for half the expenses, when asking them out.

I don't know how many dates you've been asked out on, CBG, but the norm is that most the time, when a girl gets asked out, the guy pays for it--much much more than agreements made to split the costs. Assuming that you've gone on several dates in your past, I believe that most (if not all) were paid for by the person who asked you out, right? Oh, oh, there's an assumption--I was right that you've been asked out at least several times, wasnt I?

 

[quincy]

Hmmmm...isn't assuming that the OP should pay for her part of the date exactly the type of assumption that you say has no place in this forum?

Also, I hardly think you're intelligent enough to warrant your display of condenscending behavior toward me in this thread. There are others like myself who disagree with you in this thread, so apparrently, you are not always right.

No. It is not assuming anything, Willly.

Paying the $52 is a logical solution to fstep's problem, and it is a solution that stands to cost fstep far less than a consultation with an attorney in his/her area and will cost far less than any legal action that may be available for him/her to take.

By the way, if your perception of me is that I am always right, it is probably because our paths tend to cross when I am busy correcting the incorrect nonsense you post.

(as a note, you spelled apparently and condescending wrong)

 

[Willlyjo]

No. It is not assuming anything, Willly.

Paying the $52 is a logical solution to fstep's problem, and it is a solution that stands to cost fstep far less than a consultation with an attorney in his/her area and will cost far less than any legal action that may be available for him/her to take.

By the way, if your perception of me is that I am always right, it is probably because our paths tend to cross when I am busy correcting the incorrect nonsense you post.

(as a note, you spelled apparently and condescending wrong)

Logically, 52.00 is a bit much for the OP to spend in order to address her concerns. Also, the posts from others in this thread should assure the OP that the expense of consulting with an Attorney and/or legal action is not necessary.

You're right--I mispelled 'apparently' and 'condescending', but I wasn't aware that it was necessary to perfectly spell every word. It's not like I'm writing a book here--everyone who reads surely understands, despite the mispellings.

 

[cbg]

I don't know how many times YOU'VE been asked out, Willy, but from your responses here I would suspect that you're doing all the paying because that's the only way you can get a woman to be seen with you. It's the 21st century, had you noticed?

I seriously doubt that the guy in question has any legal means to make our poster pay. But ethically and morally, I'm not so sure he doesn't have a point in demanding it.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Rule number one is never spend good money on a date, until you know there is a mutual chemistry. The guy sounds desperate. Tell him to pound sand and that you heard he already has experience doctoring his own photos.

 

[Willlyjo]

I don't know how many times YOU'VE been asked out, Willy, but from your responses here I would suspect that you're doing all the paying because that's the only way you can get a woman to be seen with you. It's the 21st century, had you noticed?

I seriously doubt that the guy in question has any legal means to make our poster pay. But ethically and morally, I'm not so sure he doesn't have a point in demanding it.

I agree with you that the guy may have a point in demanding half of the expenses after the fact, but I'm sure, IMHO, that he'll never get it if he tries to through any legal action.

Trust me, CBG, although I've paid for my share of dates I've initiated, I've also been treated to very nice dates by women who have taken care of pretty lofty expenses (in some cases).

 

[ecmst12]

Except we don't know that OP is a female, and we don't know that OP isn't the one who asked for the date in the first place.

 

[Proserpina]

, I've also been treated to very nice dates by women who have taken care of pretty lofty expenses (in some cases).

Isn't there a word for that?

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Except we don't know that OP is a female, and we don't know that OP isn't the one who asked for the date in the first place.

TMI, TMI. I just had this really strange version of my reply in reverse.