Karma comes where karma is deserved, only you have dragged a child into it too.
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Family trip
- Thread starter stepmom4ever
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Karma comes where karma is deserved, only you have dragged a child into it too.
PS:
I just HAD to respond to this. I am a native Floridian and a HUGE Disney fan.
A.) It has been SERIOUSLY cold her! I know that 18-20 degrees might be warm for some of you...but I dont even own a coat! We have had multiple hard freezes this week and it was a possibility for snow a few days ago. We didnt get it, of course, but it was a possibility. Some places have seen a lot of ice. We arent used to this, we arent prepared for this. But seriously...20 degrees is COLD no matter where you are from.
To make matters worse...I am the house supervisor of a group home for developmentally disabled men. My "office" is the back porch. Half of it was semi converted into an office. Meaning they gave us these lovely blue "insulated" panels for the ceiling...but we have PLASTIC windows. And I dont mean plexiglass...I mean PLASTIC SHEETING. So...as cold as it is outside is at LEAST as cold as it is inside my office..if not colder. The first week of the month I am chained to my computer. This was NOT a good thing.
This week I learned to drink coffee just to keep from freezing to death. And I mean REAL coffee. Not the lattees and fraps I LOVE! LOL! I am drinking a whole pot of coffee a day now!!! LOL!!!!
And as for Disney:
I have done Disney in broiling hot weather, cold weather, rainy weather. Floridians will tell you that you havent done Disney until you do it in the rain. Thats my favorite time to go because people wuss out and leave. I have been there during Spring Break and when the place was practically desserted.
You can take a child of any age there and have an amazing time...so long as you know how to do it. Dont expect to hit every ride and attraction. It isnt going to happen. Go slowly and see it through their eyes. Let them choose what to do. We took my son for his 2nd birthday and it was during spring break. It was wall to wall people and cold but it was one of my best trips. Second only to the one where I took him, by myself, right after his father and I seperated.
The problem people run into is, espeically people from outside of Florida, is they expect to do everything in one day. I understand the time crunch. But you cant see it all in one day, especially with a small child. You just have to take the experience for what it is, do as much as you can without making everyone miserable, and remember that Disney isnt going anywhere and you can always go back one day.
Would I take a once in a lifetime trip there with a small child. No. But those that live close and can get there more often could and should.
And by the way: When I tell you I am a Disney freak...I mean it.
I had my first kiss on Peter Pan's Flight.
I performed at the Christmas Candle Light service twice with my highschool chorus.
I got engaged in front of Cinderella's castle.
My wedding dress was similar to Belle's from Beauty and the Beast. (similar. Not exact! LOL!)
My bridesmaids walked down to the instrumental from Beauty and the Beast.
My wedding cake topper was Mickey and Minnie.
Honeymoon at Disney.
Wedding gift from husband was tickets to Disneyland in California since we were moving there and it had always been a dream of mine to go.
We took my son when he was two for his birthday and then to Epcot for another birthday.
My sister just took my nephew for the first time for his 4th birthday in December.
The ONLY stuff I cant seem to get rid of my from marriage and ex husband..are the things with Disney stuff on them. Especially the stuff from our honeymoon. LOL!
I just HAD to respond to this. I am a native Floridian and a HUGE Disney fan.
A.) It has been SERIOUSLY cold her! I know that 18-20 degrees might be warm for some of you...but I dont even own a coat! We have had multiple hard freezes this week and it was a possibility for snow a few days ago. We didnt get it, of course, but it was a possibility. Some places have seen a lot of ice. We arent used to this, we arent prepared for this. But seriously...20 degrees is COLD no matter where you are from.
To make matters worse...I am the house supervisor of a group home for developmentally disabled men. My "office" is the back porch. Half of it was semi converted into an office. Meaning they gave us these lovely blue "insulated" panels for the ceiling...but we have PLASTIC windows. And I dont mean plexiglass...I mean PLASTIC SHEETING. So...as cold as it is outside is at LEAST as cold as it is inside my office..if not colder. The first week of the month I am chained to my computer. This was NOT a good thing.
This week I learned to drink coffee just to keep from freezing to death. And I mean REAL coffee. Not the lattees and fraps I LOVE! LOL! I am drinking a whole pot of coffee a day now!!! LOL!!!!
And as for Disney:
I have done Disney in broiling hot weather, cold weather, rainy weather. Floridians will tell you that you havent done Disney until you do it in the rain. Thats my favorite time to go because people wuss out and leave. I have been there during Spring Break and when the place was practically desserted.
You can take a child of any age there and have an amazing time...so long as you know how to do it. Dont expect to hit every ride and attraction. It isnt going to happen. Go slowly and see it through their eyes. Let them choose what to do. We took my son for his 2nd birthday and it was during spring break. It was wall to wall people and cold but it was one of my best trips. Second only to the one where I took him, by myself, right after his father and I seperated.
The problem people run into is, espeically people from outside of Florida, is they expect to do everything in one day. I understand the time crunch. But you cant see it all in one day, especially with a small child. You just have to take the experience for what it is, do as much as you can without making everyone miserable, and remember that Disney isnt going anywhere and you can always go back one day.
Would I take a once in a lifetime trip there with a small child. No. But those that live close and can get there more often could and should.
And by the way: When I tell you I am a Disney freak...I mean it.
I had my first kiss on Peter Pan's Flight.
I performed at the Christmas Candle Light service twice with my highschool chorus.
I got engaged in front of Cinderella's castle.
My wedding dress was similar to Belle's from Beauty and the Beast. (similar. Not exact! LOL!)
My bridesmaids walked down to the instrumental from Beauty and the Beast.
My wedding cake topper was Mickey and Minnie.
Honeymoon at Disney.
Wedding gift from husband was tickets to Disneyland in California since we were moving there and it had always been a dream of mine to go.
We took my son when he was two for his birthday and then to Epcot for another birthday.
My sister just took my nephew for the first time for his 4th birthday in December.
The ONLY stuff I cant seem to get rid of my from marriage and ex husband..are the things with Disney stuff on them. Especially the stuff from our honeymoon. LOL!
I also do not think sm4 will get dinged in court by just this particular decision. I do however, agree w/OG that she could get dinged simply because you just never know what a presiding court official might do.... Just refer to raisingmaddy's situation for a prime example of what a judge can do. Her situation is a bit extreme, however there are other court officials out there who also are not always fair minded and/or are biased toward one of the parties regardless as to whether or not one of the parties has acted inappropriately toward the other party.
TheGeekess
Keeper of the Kraken
OP can do what she wants. If a judge at some point when paperwork is filed is going to ding her or not.... That's always a maybe. And that's what I've seen being argued around. No matter how it's stated (could, probably, might), it all means the same thing in the end.
The question of OP allowing the PGPs to take Baby out of state for a week and how a judge might view it is a Crystal Ball Question.
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penelope10
Senior Member
Legally, I cannot with certainty predict how a judge will view this. However given the fact that Dad is going also I believe that the baby should be allowed to go. He is, after all, the other parent and should be trusted to look after the child without Mom being around.
I have a friend who is a gm. Her son and the child's mother were never married. She took her gc who is about 2 and the baby's cousin who is 3 to Sea World. (Without either parent). lol the kiddos had a great time,didn't hurt them a bit. Now gm and gp, on the other hand, were pretty dern tired after the trip!
I have a friend who is a gm. Her son and the child's mother were never married. She took her gc who is about 2 and the baby's cousin who is 3 to Sea World. (Without either parent). lol the kiddos had a great time,didn't hurt them a bit. Now gm and gp, on the other hand, were pretty dern tired after the trip!
TheGeekess
Keeper of the Kraken
Hey, Penelope.... Dad's not going.
penelope10
Senior Member
Oh when I read the original post I thought it said that Dad and the other child were going. (Lol post said "taken" Dad and the other child)
LdiJ
Senior Member
Dad is not going.
Its a week long trip.
The child is 16 months old.
The trip is out of state.
The grandparents have only seen the child a handful of times since the child was born.
The child has never been separated from her parents for any extended time.
The parents are in the middle of a divorce.
OK, for my own legal knowlege....
Let's ignore that SM4E is who she is. Pretend she is a first time poster who cam on and said "My STBX's parents want to take our 16 month old child out of state for a week, and dad would like for her to go. He will not be going. Our child has not spent substatial time with them and has never been out of her dad's or my care for that long of a period of time. I am not comfortable with this. Do I have to let her go?"
What makes dad's wishes more important than mom's? Someone is obviously gonig to have to give, but why would Mom bebtrumping Dad's rights by saying no, but Dad decreeing that kiddo WILL go is not trumpng Mom's rights.
(My kids DID have an established relationship with all four grandparents and spent LOTS of time with them and frankly I wouldn't have wanted them several states away for an entire week.. Just sayin....)
Let's ignore that SM4E is who she is. Pretend she is a first time poster who cam on and said "My STBX's parents want to take our 16 month old child out of state for a week, and dad would like for her to go. He will not be going. Our child has not spent substatial time with them and has never been out of her dad's or my care for that long of a period of time. I am not comfortable with this. Do I have to let her go?"
What makes dad's wishes more important than mom's? Someone is obviously gonig to have to give, but why would Mom bebtrumping Dad's rights by saying no, but Dad decreeing that kiddo WILL go is not trumpng Mom's rights.
(My kids DID have an established relationship with all four grandparents and spent LOTS of time with them and frankly I wouldn't have wanted them several states away for an entire week.. Just sayin....)
wileybunch
Senior Member
Right. Who stepmom4ever is does need to be set aside to answer the question.
OTOH, the reason why no one could know for a fact how any particular element will weigh in a judge's decision is because judge takes a look at the entire picture. If Mom's nose is clean in all other respects and she comes across as a Mom that has her act together and doesn't have inclination to want to dirty the water in Dad's relationship with child and hasn't tried in other ways to alienate child's relationship with g'parents, then that's one thing. If Mom's shown inclination to do these things, not letting child go on visit with g'parents could be seen as yet one more thing. So it's not black and white, but given the age of the child, there's no way it's some sort of slam dunk that Dad's going to get Mom slammed for this, no way.
OTOH, the reason why no one could know for a fact how any particular element will weigh in a judge's decision is because judge takes a look at the entire picture. If Mom's nose is clean in all other respects and she comes across as a Mom that has her act together and doesn't have inclination to want to dirty the water in Dad's relationship with child and hasn't tried in other ways to alienate child's relationship with g'parents, then that's one thing. If Mom's shown inclination to do these things, not letting child go on visit with g'parents could be seen as yet one more thing. So it's not black and white, but given the age of the child, there's no way it's some sort of slam dunk that Dad's going to get Mom slammed for this, no way.
LdiJ
Senior Member
Several of us have made similar points and completely agree with you.
Ohiogal
Queen Bee
Yes. Which is the reason why the judge COULD ding her for this.
penelope10
Senior Member
As far as I can tell these gp's have not hurt the other grand child and have a close relationship with that child. (Because that mother allows them time with that child) And it doesn't like they have made any attempt to take off with that child and not return the child to his mother.
I can understand that this child is 16 months old and that Mom is nervous about letting the child go. However, there is no evidence that the other grandchild has ever come to any harm while under their care. And how can said child have a close relationship with gp's if Mom limits their time with them?
In my own opinion, it could go either way about Mom being dinged in court for not allowing the child to go on this trip. However, when said divorce does happen, Dad can and probably will allow this child to go on trips etc. during his parenting time...Mom had best wrap her mind around that idea.
I can understand that this child is 16 months old and that Mom is nervous about letting the child go. However, there is no evidence that the other grandchild has ever come to any harm while under their care. And how can said child have a close relationship with gp's if Mom limits their time with them?
In my own opinion, it could go either way about Mom being dinged in court for not allowing the child to go on this trip. However, when said divorce does happen, Dad can and probably will allow this child to go on trips etc. during his parenting time...Mom had best wrap her mind around that idea.
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