Father has cancer

[LdiJ]

People are getting away from the law on this thread and getting too far into "opinion".

My opinion is that dad and child should spend as much time together as is realistically feasible during this period.

However, visitation rights are not transferable and if dad is in a residential treatment center then the stepmother and the grandparents don't get dad's time. They may end up facilitating dad's visitation by providing the transportation for the child and dad to visit, but they don't get dad's time. Its not like dad will be there to pick up the child and drop him off at the grandparents.

In addition, if the CO says "liberal visitation" then there is no official schedule and mom can't be held in contempt anyway unless she completely denies.

The bottom line folks is that the stepmom and grandparents don't get dad's visitation. Its no different than if dad moved out of state and then expected the grandparents to get his scheduled visitation....it doesn't work that way.

 

[CJane]

In addition, if the CO says "liberal visitation" then there is no official schedule and mom can't be held in contempt anyway unless she completely denies.

The bottom line folks is that the stepmom and grandparents don't get dad's visitation. Its no different than if dad moved out of state and then expected the grandparents to get his scheduled visitation....it doesn't work that way.

Yabbut - she doesn't KNOW that he's going into any sort of facility. She's seeking advice based on gossip. And when does 'complete denial' take place? Does she have the right to say "It will be damaging to my child to see his father while he's receiving treatment, so call when he's home again"? Or for her to say that SHE is the only one allowed to transport the child (never mind that she has a restraining order against Father - unless I have the wrong poster, and then NM).

Does she have the right to FORCE Father to have a conversation with her or with the child re: his condition, in exchange for visitation?

How far can she go to chage the accepted status quo, all in the name of 'protecting' her son - when all it really sounds like she's doing is using the Father's illness as a reason to justify not allowing the child to spend time with people she doesn't like.

 

[nolegirl1990]

Here is what my CO says

The wife (me) has primary residential custody, control, and supervision of the child, but shall confer with the husband (ex) on all important matters concerning health, education, and general well being. The husband shall have liberal frequent visitaion with the minor child as follows:
(As I said the Thurs, Fri, every other weekend thing.)
It also says that the parties shall keep the other informed of his/her place residence and shall promptly notify the other when they change residence.
In addition, it says that each parent should consult with each other on all significant decisions concerning the child's best welfare.
I do not have ROFR.
Shouldn't my ex confer with me about his condition? (I assure you this is not just rumor- he is sick-just may have a better prognosis than I was told)I would say that a Dad having cancer is an important thing in my son's life. And IF Dad goes to a residential treatment center, shouldn't he notify me?
Again, I will talk to my ex as soon as he answers my phone calls and hopefully, we can work something out where I can help him and his family as much as possible. Especially, if he goes to a treatment facility that is 4 hours from where we live-I know that it is in my son's best interest to temporarily modify our existing schedule and maybe have him go every weekend to Dad during that time, but during the week stay overnight at my house.
If Dad does not agree to that, do I have a right to try to enforce/go to court about this type of schedule?...Again, his family are not just people I do not like...they are people who will harm the child emotionally, because they have mental health problems. And my son's stepmom is no better,My son's stepmom was convicted of a felony DUI/MANSLUGHTER.Needless to say , I do not want her driving my son anywhere- especially long distances. But if I have no legal rights to back me up...then I will have to just pray very hard when my son is over with the Dad's family during this difficult time for all of us.
I just want to ensure that my son is safe and secure during this ordeal. I know that he is better off at my house when and if Dad is away. Just like if I was sick, I would ask Dad to watch our son for the most part- not sneak the fact that I am ill and have my family watch my son while I am gone for 3 months.

 

[Jillian483]

The wife (me) has primary residential custody, control, and supervision of the child, but shall confer with the husband (ex) on all important matters concerning health, education, and general well being. The husband shall have liberal frequent visitaion with the minor child as follows:
(As I said the Thurs, Fri, every other weekend thing.)
It also says that the parties shall keep the other informed of his/her place residence and shall promptly notify the other when they change residence.
In addition, it says that each parent should consult with each other on all significant decisions concerning the child's best welfare.
I do not have ROFR.
Shouldn't my ex confer with me about his condition? (I assure you this is not just rumor- he is sick-just may have a better prognosis than I was told)I would say that a Dad having cancer is an important thing in my son's life. And IF Dad goes to a residential treatment center, shouldn't he notify me?
Again, I will talk to my ex as soon as he answers my phone calls and hopefully, we can work something out where I can help him and his family as much as possible. Especially, if he goes to a treatment facility that is 4 hours from where we live-I know that it is in my son's best interest to temporarily modify our existing schedule and maybe have him go every weekend to Dad during that time, but during the week stay overnight at my house.
If Dad does not agree to that, do I have a right to try to enforce/go to court about this type of schedule?...Again, his family are not just people I do not like...they are people who will harm the child emotionally, because they have mental health problems. And my son's stepmom is no better,My son's stepmom was convicted of a felony DUI/MANSLUGHTER.Needless to say , I do not want her driving my son anywhere- especially long distances. But if I have no legal rights to back me up...then I will have to just pray very hard when my son is over with the Dad's family during this difficult time for all of us.
I just want to ensure that my son is safe and secure during this ordeal. I know that he is better off at my house when and if Dad is away. Just like if I was sick, I would ask Dad to watch our son for the most part- not sneak the fact that I am ill and have my family watch my son while I am gone for 3 months.

1) Call your ex up and block your phone number. Press *67 before you dial and this will cause it to be blocked. If too much time passes and he is still not answering your calls then I think if is time to get over there and talk to him in person. It would be better that way anyway.
2) Discus with your hubbie your concerns and things like that.
3) If you fear that he won't give you the info on his treatment then make sure you get this out of him before you start going into who watches the kid.

 

[LdiJ]

The wife (me) has primary residential custody, control, and supervision of the child, but shall confer with the husband (ex) on all important matters concerning health, education, and general well being. The husband shall have liberal frequent visitaion with the minor child as follows:
(As I said the Thurs, Fri, every other weekend thing.)
It also says that the parties shall keep the other informed of his/her place residence and shall promptly notify the other when they change residence.
In addition, it says that each parent should consult with each other on all significant decisions concerning the child's best welfare.
I do not have ROFR.
Shouldn't my ex confer with me about his condition? (I assure you this is not just rumor- he is sick-just may have a better prognosis than I was told)I would say that a Dad having cancer is an important thing in my son's life. And IF Dad goes to a residential treatment center, shouldn't he notify me?
Again, I will talk to my ex as soon as he answers my phone calls and hopefully, we can work something out where I can help him and his family as much as possible. Especially, if he goes to a treatment facility that is 4 hours from where we live-I know that it is in my son's best interest to temporarily modify our existing schedule and maybe have him go every weekend to Dad during that time, but during the week stay overnight at my house.
If Dad does not agree to that, do I have a right to try to enforce/go to court about this type of schedule?...Again, his family are not just people I do not like...they are people who will harm the child emotionally, because they have mental health problems. And my son's stepmom is no better,My son's stepmom was convicted of a felony DUI/MANSLUGHTER.Needless to say , I do not want her driving my son anywhere- especially long distances. But if I have no legal rights to back me up...then I will have to just pray very hard when my son is over with the Dad's family during this difficult time for all of us.
I just want to ensure that my son is safe and secure during this ordeal. I know that he is better off at my house when and if Dad is away. Just like if I was sick, I would ask Dad to watch our son for the most part- not sneak the fact that I am ill and have my family watch my son while I am gone for 3 months.

Well heck I wouldn't want the stepmother driving MY kid either. I think that you just need to sit down and have a serious talk with the dad. Tell him that you are aware of his condition and that the two of you need to talk about your child....be kind....No matter what kind of a person he has been the big C is a very scary thing....particulary when the prognosis is not good.

The reality of the situation is that if dad goes into the residential treatment center the child is going to be staying with you, except for times when visitation with dad is possible...the stepmom and the grandparents may try to make it otherwise...but its not going to work that way and they need to understand that up front. Again, that doesn't mean that you shouldn't be kind...and shouldn't be accomodating, but it does mean that you should make it clear that you won't accept "game playing".

Grandparents and stepparents have no rights in Florida and no ability to sue for rights.