Filing for change of custody

[Tinaa]

What is the name of your state? Texas

All hell has broken loose in my step-children's life. Their mom has moved in a known drug dealer and the kids want out.

As a legal stranger I have no standing; I am looking for info for my husband so that he may take the proper steps to change custody. I have a bit more free time to do the research needed.

The kids are 13, 15, and 16. Money is a bit short at our house so he'd like to be able to it pro se if possible. We'll dig up the money some how if not. He can, at least, get all appropriate documents together.

The kids have moved 12 times in two years. Why didn't he do anything before? No proof of anything that would stand up in court. Now, two of the kids have failed a grade and the mother has been fined for allowing the 15 year old to skip school.

Does he have to file in the county where they divorced?
Are the forms downloadable?

I'm not even sure where to start. Help!

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state? Texas

All hell has broken loose in my step-children's life. Their mom has moved in a known drug dealer and the kids want out.

Known as in convicted with a record? Or known as in everyone says he is?


As a legal stranger I have no standing; I am looking for info for my husband so that he may take the proper steps to change custody. I have a bit more free time to do the research needed.


CONGRATS on recognizing that. That attitude and outlook will get you far. And no that is not sarcasm.


The kids are 13, 15, and 16. Money is a bit short at our house so he'd like to be able to it pro se if possible. We'll dig up the money some how if not. He can, at least, get all appropriate documents together.


Pro se is difficult. He would have to prove a change in circumstances since the custody order was set. He would have to prove that it is in the best interest of the children for him to receive custody. A drug dealer is not necessarily enough. What else do you have?

The kids have moved 12 times in two years. Why didn't he do anything before? No proof of anything that would stand up in court. Now, two of the kids have failed a grade and the mother has been fined for allowing the 15 year old to skip school.

How do you know they have moved 12 times in two years? They are at least at the age where they could testify probably and the court wouldn't have too big of a problem with it. However it is not necessarily a good thing to ever have them involved. The fact that mom has "allowed" the 15 year old to skip school is a negative but how do you know she allowed it and the 15-year-0ld wasn't just being stupid and will do the same thing at your place?

Does he have to file in the county where they divorced?
Are the forms downloadable?

I'm not even sure where to start. Help!

The court with jurisdiction is the one that ordered custody the last time. The forms may or may not be downloadable. You have to file a motion to change custody and maybe other forms. Visit the county website and see what information you can procure.

 

[Tinaa]

Known as in convicted with a record? Or known as in everyone says he is?

Known as in convictions for burglery, possession with intent to sell, etc. Jail time served.

How do you know they have moved 12 times in two years?

Would school records be enough to prove the moves?

The fact that mom has "allowed" the 15 year old to skip school is a negative but how do you know she allowed it and the 15-year-0ld wasn't just being stupid and will do the same thing at your place?

For one thing, I work at the school so I would at least know she's not there. Two, according to SD and mom, mom just wouldn't make her get up and go. Not provable in court, however the mom did take responsibility at truancy court and was levied a fine.

As a side note: Mom quit school, never graduated, and doesn't seen to grasp the value of an education - again not provable in court. Mom is rarely home and not because she is working. My husband does not want to "put down" the mom. She does love her children fiercely, she's just made some really, really bad choices in the last couple of years. The kids are suffering from her poor choices. My husband has provided moral support, (always available to a shoulder to cry on)monetary support, (paid for GED classes for mom, in addition to CS - mom quit).

They are at least at the age where they could testify probably and the court wouldn't have too big of a problem with it. However it is not necessarily a good thing to ever have them involved.

He would rather not have the children involved.

What is "proof" is considered acceptable to court?

 

[Ohiogal]

Known as in convictions for burglery, possession with intent to sell, etc. Jail time served.

Okay but he served his time. YOu need to prove he is doing it around the kids and endangering them.

Would school records be enough to prove the moves?

School records are official documents HOWEVER dad would need to get copies and not you.


For one thing, I work at the school so I would at least know she's not there. Two, according to SD and mom, mom just wouldn't make her get up and go. Not provable in court, however the mom did take responsibility at truancy court and was levied a fine.

Well mom took dresponsibility which could be proof.

As a side note: Mom quit school, never graduated, and doesn't seen to grasp the value of an education - again not provable in court. Mom is rarely home and not because she is working. My husband does not want to "put down" the mom. She does love her children fiercely, she's just made some really, really bad choices in the last couple of years. The kids are suffering from her poor choices. My husband has provided moral support, (always available to a shoulder to cry on)monetary support, (paid for GED classes for mom, in addition to CS - mom quit).

Mom quitting school isn't a change. Mom not working is not a change.

He would rather not have the children involved.

What is "proof" is considered acceptable to court?

Courts don't want kids involved either.

 

[Tinaa]

Thanks for your help Ohiogal. And believe me, I get you; I have no dog in this fight. I am totally aware of that fact.

You are correct. Mom has never kept a job for more than a couple of months.

I checked the website for that county and it was no help at all.

SD did find a bag of weed in the mother's dresser drawer. Again , that would involve having the child testify against the mom. BAD, BAD idea.

Geez...what does it take?

 

[Ithildriel]

Thanks for your help Ohiogal. And believe me, I get you; I have no dog in this fight. I am totally aware of that fact.

You are correct. Mom has never kept a job for more than a couple of months.

I checked the website for that county and it was no help at all.

SD did find a bag of weed in the mother's dresser drawer. Again , that would involve having the child testify against the mom. BAD, BAD idea.

Geez...what does it take?

A bag of weed does not a drug dealer make.

Sorry for your SD though, that sucks...of course why was she snooping in mom's drawers?

 

[Tinaa]

The weed is not really a big deal. The meth and needles are the big deal!

Sorry for your SD though, that sucks...of course why was she snooping in mom's drawers?

I didn't ask. I'm trying to stay out of the mess as much as I can. I listen, empathize and tell SD to talk to her dad.

Dad talked to mom today and she's agreed she's not doing what is right for the children. Whether or not she'll agree to a change in custody is another thing all together. I told him this is too big for him to do it on his own. He's going to have to speak to an attorney.

 

[Ohiogal]

The weed is not really a big deal. The meth and needles are the big deal!

Where did you say METH and needles? Was that his past conviction that he already served time for? Again, can you prove it is there?

I didn't ask. I'm trying to stay out of the mess as much as I can. I listen, empathize and tell SD to talk to her dad.

Dad talked to mom today and she's agreed she's not doing what is right for the children. Whether or not she'll agree to a change in custody is another thing all together. I told him this is too big for him to do it on his own. He's going to have to speak to an attorney.

Dad needs to get an attorney -- you are right. He doesn't want to do this without an attorney.

 

[Tinaa]

I didn't spell out meth and needles because SD hasn't seen them sticking it in their arms. SD has seen the paraphernalia for the drug use (little baggies, orange needle covers, bag of weed) BUT, there are no pictures - no proof. Mom stays up for three or four days and crashes for two. Definitely drug use, definitely no proof.

Yes, at least one his convictions was for meth. He's been in and out of the pen for most of his adult life. No proof he's doing it again.

Husband will contact his attorney Monday. Think this can be resolved by the time school starts?

§ 156.101. GROUNDS FOR MODIFICATION OF ORDER ESTABLISHING
CONSERVATORSHIP OR POSSESSION AND ACCESS. The court may modify an
order that provides for the appointment of a conservator of a child,
that provides the terms and conditions of conservatorship, or that
provides for the possession of or access to a child if modification
would be in the best interest of the child and:
(1) the circumstances of the child, a conservator, or
other party affected by the order have materially and substantially
changed since the earlier of:
(A) the date of the rendition of the order; or
(B) the date of the signing of a mediated or
collaborative law settlement agreement on which the order is based;
(2) the child is at least 12 years of age and has filed
with the court, in writing, the name of the person who is the
child's preference to have the exclusive right to designate the
primary residence of the child; or
(3) the conservator who has the exclusive right to
designate the primary residence of the child has voluntarily
relinquished the primary care and possession of the child to
another person for at least six months.

SD has said she'd would go this route. Apparently she's doen a bit of research on her own. She has said can pick who she wants to live with since she's 15. Dad explained it is not quite that easy, She would not have to say anything about her mother. Bad idea?

 

[LdiJ]

The odds of resolving anything before school starts are not strong at all. He may not even get a preliminary court date by then....