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Help with possible elder abuse
- Thread starter Snowey
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See my reply to pojo. Snowey has absolutely NO legal authorization to touch her MIL's estate/assests. Sheesh, just exactly what part of that do you NOT understand!!
I'm sorry to keep at this but NO WHERE in the sentence you keep quoting does comet suggest taking any money out of anything she is saying they should take care of the matter that the SIL is taking the money!
You do need to have the removal of money be taken care of immediately before she takes out anymore.
Sheesh
I'm sorry to keep at this but NO WHERE in the sentence you keep quoting does comet suggest taking any money out of anything she is saying they should take care of the matter that the SIL is taking the money!
You do need to have the removal of money be taken care of immediately before she takes out anymore.
Sheesh
well I did not mean to start a fight
my husband is on together as DPOA,so he can act together or individually for Mom.
the sister is now in a rehab but she will still probably go to jail.
so next week we have to go to MO. to the same lawyer that drew up the POA and have the sister revoked.
we are going to have to move all Mom's belongings in 3 days and move her to Louisiana.
the Lawyer told us that my husband does not have to have the sister's permission to sell the house.
we are going to have to sell the house and put the money in an account for my mother in law's care if she needs it.Long term care should be there hopefully for a couple of years.
so hopefully we can get all this done and get the proper care for Mom.
we are going to have to find a Dr. here in Louisiana and probably get Medicare to pay an aide to come and bathe and dress her 3 days a week .and get Adult Day care 2 times a week and then for the future an assisted living facility.
the sister did not get Mom to do anything but sit in front of the tv.
I just got Mom to practice writing her name and got her to start coloring in a coloring book
I have been reading things on the internet to learn more about Alzheimers and what other people go through.
Thanks yall for trying to help! I feel like we are figuring it all out and making some progress.
my husband is on together as DPOA,so he can act together or individually for Mom.
the sister is now in a rehab but she will still probably go to jail.
so next week we have to go to MO. to the same lawyer that drew up the POA and have the sister revoked.
we are going to have to move all Mom's belongings in 3 days
and move her to Louisiana.the Lawyer told us that my husband does not have to have the sister's permission to sell the house.
we are going to have to sell the house and put the money in an account for my mother in law's care if she needs it.Long term care should be there hopefully for a couple of years.
so hopefully we can get all this done and get the proper care for Mom.
we are going to have to find a Dr. here in Louisiana and probably get Medicare to pay an aide to come and bathe and dress her 3 days a week .and get Adult Day care 2 times a week and then for the future an assisted living facility.
the sister did not get Mom to do anything but sit in front of the tv.
I just got Mom to practice writing her name and got her to start coloring in a coloring book
I have been reading things on the internet to learn more about Alzheimers and what other people go through.
Thanks yall for trying to help! I feel like we are figuring it all out and making some progress.
Hi Yall!
well we did it,we were able to take care of everything and get my MIL's belongings.
it was hard but we had to drive to Mo. and the day we got there we went to the lawyer's office and revoked the Sister's POA.
the sister was suppose to be in rehab.
we had to go to the house and find out about all the utilities and have them cut off.the sister had her car in her Mom's name and we had to cancel the insurance that the Mom was paying for.
we found out that the sister was using her Mom's money to pay for her(sister)cell phone ,internet service ,cash to herself ,cash to her son****************************..
we had to move Mom's things quickly and then the CRAZY SISTER and her son show up.
she started screaming and saying it was her house
we were very calm(it made the sister and son look like fools) and telling her that it was Mom's house and we are selling it.she also said that her Mom's antique furniture was hers too and we said that Mom needs it(bedroom suite) and the sister said tough
the sister tells us to shut up and tries to lock us out of the house,she calls the cops and tells him that she is the POA and she wants us to leave.
so we give the cop the POA papers that state her POA is revoked and she goes CRAZY.
so I say we are doing what is best for Mom and we have not stolen Mom's money like her.
the cop has to hold her back because she is trying to jump on me and she does hit me
it was too funny ,she is CRAZY and I am glad that we were able to get Mom out of that sad situation.
the son was cursing at us and telling us that he is going to come get us in LA.
I mean they were totally out of control and we thought the cop was going to let it escalate but he said he has been dealing with them since 1990 and he finally got them to leave.
we did not feel safe after all that ,we did not want them to come back .
so we quickly got the rest of Mom's things and got out of there and did all this in 2 days.
we gave the keys to the real estate company and when the sister and son has to get there belongings the cops will escort them so they will not tear up the house.
here is my question
when the house does sell Mom may only get $50,000 and the lawyer told my husband to put the money in his name because the sister and brother my try to take it(they have mooched off Mom for years).
our plan is to put it in a CD for her care(Alzheimers) after her Long Term insurance runs out.(5 yrs.)
Is that the proper procedure to do this?
We want to make sure that this money is for Mom .
sorry for the long post but I thought yall would find this story interesting.
the sisters true colors came out!
well we did it,we were able to take care of everything and get my MIL's belongings.
it was hard but we had to drive to Mo. and the day we got there we went to the lawyer's office and revoked the Sister's POA.
the sister was suppose to be in rehab.
we had to go to the house and find out about all the utilities and have them cut off.the sister had her car in her Mom's name and we had to cancel the insurance that the Mom was paying for.
we found out that the sister was using her Mom's money to pay for her(sister)cell phone ,internet service ,cash to herself ,cash to her son****************************..
we had to move Mom's things quickly and then the CRAZY SISTER and her son show up.
she started screaming and saying it was her house
we were very calm(it made the sister and son look like fools) and telling her that it was Mom's house and we are selling it.she also said that her Mom's antique furniture was hers too and we said that Mom needs it(bedroom suite) and the sister said tough
the sister tells us to shut up and tries to lock us out of the house,she calls the cops and tells him that she is the POA and she wants us to leave.
so we give the cop the POA papers that state her POA is revoked and she goes CRAZY.
so I say we are doing what is best for Mom and we have not stolen Mom's money like her.
the cop has to hold her back because she is trying to jump on me and she does hit me
it was too funny ,she is CRAZY and I am glad that we were able to get Mom out of that sad situation.
the son was cursing at us and telling us that he is going to come get us in LA.
I mean they were totally out of control and we thought the cop was going to let it escalate but he said he has been dealing with them since 1990 and he finally got them to leave.
we did not feel safe after all that ,we did not want them to come back .
so we quickly got the rest of Mom's things and got out of there and did all this in 2 days.
we gave the keys to the real estate company and when the sister and son has to get there belongings the cops will escort them so they will not tear up the house.
here is my question
when the house does sell Mom may only get $50,000 and the lawyer told my husband to put the money in his name because the sister and brother my try to take it(they have mooched off Mom for years).
our plan is to put it in a CD for her care(Alzheimers) after her Long Term insurance runs out.(5 yrs.)
Is that the proper procedure to do this?
We want to make sure that this money is for Mom .
sorry for the long post but I thought yall would find this story interesting.
the sisters true colors came out!
Hi Yall!
just thought I would tell you what the CRAZY sister and her son have done today.
I got a call from the real estate lady and she said they went to change the locks on MIL's house(MO.) and they found that someone(crazy sister)had gone in the house and turned on all the stove burners on high,they turned on the heat to the house all the way up.and they did something to the hot water heater.and trashed the house.
CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!!!
the CRAZY sister and her son were trying to burn the Mom's house down!
these people are CRAZY!
we do not know what they will do so we are going to have to get Guardianship here in LA.
just thought I would tell you what the CRAZY sister and her son have done today.
I got a call from the real estate lady and she said they went to change the locks on MIL's house(MO.) and they found that someone(crazy sister)had gone in the house and turned on all the stove burners on high,they turned on the heat to the house all the way up.and they did something to the hot water heater.and trashed the house.
CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT!!!!
the CRAZY sister and her son were trying to burn the Mom's house down!
these people are CRAZY!
we do not know what they will do so we are going to have to get Guardianship here in LA.
my MIL said that she wanted to go to Louisiana and have her daughter taken off as POA because she understands that the daughter is going to jail and there is no one else in MO. to take care of her.
and when I told her today that her daughter tried to burn her house down my MIL said
THAT IS JUST STUPID ,I DO NOT WANT TO SEE HER ANYMORE.
those were her exact words so she understands what is going on.
and according to the Law you are not incompetent unless a court deems you so but we are going to get Guardianship to protect Mom from these crazies ,we do not know if they will try to come to LA. to burn our house down 
and when I told her today that her daughter tried to burn her house down my MIL said
THAT IS JUST STUPID ,I DO NOT WANT TO SEE HER ANYMORE.
those were her exact words so she understands what is going on.
and according to the Law you are not incompetent unless a court deems you so but we are going to get Guardianship to protect Mom from these crazies ,we do not know if they will try to come to LA. to burn our house down
then tell me how in the world were we suppose to deal with all this in 3 days.
the MIL was in La. with us already ,the SIL agreed to it but the SIL would not give us MIL's money or belongings to take care of MIL.
the SIL was in rehab because she tried to kill herself after she got her 4th DWI.
there was NO ONE to take care of MIL in MO.
the SIL and her son were living off MIL's money and house.
we had to act quick.
and now we are getting Guardianship in LA.
and from what I have read is that all MIL has to say is that she does not want her daughter as POA and it is revoked.
and that is what she did.
my husbands 2 brothers and sister are all in jail. I say that is horrible!
all my husband's brothers and sister have STOLEN from there Mom.
they are all felons,so don't you think that my husband who does not have a criminal history would be best to TAKE CARE OF MOM.
sheesh,I am ticked off that this family is so screwed up and they think it is ok to STEAL from their Mom!
1 son has been in prison for 25 years for murder ,he jumped bail and Mom lost $50,000 .
and when he jumped bail in 1980 he lived for 2 years with an alias .
He even got a grant to go to school!
But what was bad was at that time the other brother was 16 and he helped bury the body in the desert.
PRETTY SICK HUH!
so now this other brother has been doing meth for many years(and charged Mom's credit cards up) .He is in jail now and was due to get out at the end of August to parole TO MOM"S HOUSE with crazy sister while Mom was in LA. with us.
So please explain to me How you would protect your Mom in these crazy situations?
we did not know the sister was this bad until we realized that she would not give us any of Mom's money to take care of Mom.
After we spent OUR MONEY to go get Mom ,Mom's dog needed Frontline so I would not get fleas in my house.
My husband called his sister(July) and she said that Mom did not have any money but that in August sister would send us $200.
So a big red flag went up !
So think about what would you have done to protect your Mom from CRIMINALS!
the MIL was in La. with us already ,the SIL agreed to it but the SIL would not give us MIL's money or belongings to take care of MIL.
the SIL was in rehab because she tried to kill herself after she got her 4th DWI.
there was NO ONE to take care of MIL in MO.
the SIL and her son were living off MIL's money and house.
we had to act quick.
and now we are getting Guardianship in LA.
and from what I have read is that all MIL has to say is that she does not want her daughter as POA and it is revoked.
and that is what she did.
my husbands 2 brothers and sister are all in jail. I say that is horrible!
all my husband's brothers and sister have STOLEN from there Mom.
they are all felons,so don't you think that my husband who does not have a criminal history would be best to TAKE CARE OF MOM.
sheesh,I am ticked off that this family is so screwed up and they think it is ok to STEAL from their Mom!
1 son has been in prison for 25 years for murder ,he jumped bail and Mom lost $50,000 .
and when he jumped bail in 1980 he lived for 2 years with an alias .
He even got a grant to go to school!
But what was bad was at that time the other brother was 16 and he helped bury the body in the desert.
PRETTY SICK HUH!
so now this other brother has been doing meth for many years(and charged Mom's credit cards up) .He is in jail now and was due to get out at the end of August to parole TO MOM"S HOUSE with crazy sister while Mom was in LA. with us.
So please explain to me How you would protect your Mom in these crazy situations?
we did not know the sister was this bad until we realized that she would not give us any of Mom's money to take care of Mom.
After we spent OUR MONEY to go get Mom ,Mom's dog needed Frontline so I would not get fleas in my house.
My husband called his sister(July) and she said that Mom did not have any money but that in August sister would send us $200.
So a big red flag went up !
So think about what would you have done to protect your Mom from CRIMINALS!
maybe I should mention that the WHOLE town(pop. 1000) knows what is going on.
the very small police station knows all of this and everybody KNOWS that my husband is doing what is best for Mom.
the police officer told the real estate lady to not deal with sister especially when she is drunk!
Nobody feels safe dealing with sister and her son!
and that is why we had to act quickly and my husband works 6 days a week so it is VERY HARD to find the time to deal with all of this!
the very small police station knows all of this and everybody KNOWS that my husband is doing what is best for Mom.
the police officer told the real estate lady to not deal with sister especially when she is drunk!
Nobody feels safe dealing with sister and her son!
and that is why we had to act quickly and my husband works 6 days a week so it is VERY HARD to find the time to deal with all of this!
earlofcrankcase
Member
Good on you & your husband. Way to go. I have heard a guardianship brings on a lot of unnecessary legal expenses. www.eldercareanswers.com Her poa being revoked should do it. The CD is a good way to easily document the accounting of funds you will need to do. LTHC insurance & SS payments should hold you in good position for the next few years. So keep turning the CD's. & make sure you account for the SS funds. I don't think you need to worry about trouble from physco. Well, legal trouble anyway.
I don't think you should be telling mom about her daughters transgressions though.
Her children are her greatest achievement. Let her have that while she can still remember it.
Hope you have more than your fair share of patience. You will need all of it & then some. In the meantime you will still have the no girl is good enough for my son thing to deal with.
I didn't think my mom could top the taking & misplacing of a 17k check out of our locked mail box but yesterday she did it. Yesterday my best dog got hit by a car $340.00 later we are back home & everything is going to be ok. 3:00 am in the morning I find the dog in my mom's room with the Elizabethine color removed. I fricken poped. Time gives you practice dealing with this. But is also wears you down. You are going to need a lot of hart to make it & I hope that you do. good luck.
I don't think you should be telling mom about her daughters transgressions though.
Her children are her greatest achievement. Let her have that while she can still remember it.
Hope you have more than your fair share of patience. You will need all of it & then some. In the meantime you will still have the no girl is good enough for my son thing to deal with.
I didn't think my mom could top the taking & misplacing of a 17k check out of our locked mail box but yesterday she did it. Yesterday my best dog got hit by a car $340.00 later we are back home & everything is going to be ok. 3:00 am in the morning I find the dog in my mom's room with the Elizabethine color removed. I fricken poped. Time gives you practice dealing with this. But is also wears you down. You are going to need a lot of hart to make it & I hope that you do. good luck.
WOULD YOU JUST STICK TO WHAT YOU KNOW -- POURING CONCRETE!!earlofcrankcase said:
Snowey's mother-in-law CANNOT revoke a POA. Snowey's MIL is INCOMPETENT!!!!
Snowey and her husband are getting themselves in LEGAL trouble. I can see the judge now reviewing the bank statements and asking about the money.
Hi yall
legal trouble from who?
I have proof the daughter was living off Mom and if she ever wanted to do anything about this we would Petition the Court to have her give an account of her POA.
Do you really think that the sister that has 4 DWIs ,Burglary in 2nd degree ,property damage in first degree and does not have a job would look very good in the eyes of a court?
and she probably is going to jail for a few years.
Do you think that the 1 son who is suppose to parole at the end of August ,that is in jail for Meth is going to look good in the eyes of the court?
Do you think that the other son that has been in prison for 25 years would look good in the eyes of the court?
Do you understand that Guardianship takes MONEY and TIME ?
I asked questions on this board about what to do and now you want to criticize!
there are many family members(cousins &uncles)that would testify to how bad Mom's situation was and that they know Mom is being taken care of now.
and that is what really matters!
and also the Law does say that the principal of the POA is the one who revokes the POA.and that is what Mom did and it can be proven that my husband acted IN HER BEST INTEREST.
I do not believe that the sister using Moms's money to pay for the sister(49 years old) and her son's(30) cell phone bill ($100 month) was acting in her Mom's best interest!not to mention all the other crap she did!
also we talked to an Attorney in LA. and they said that the DPOA is ok right now and that Guardianship is EXPENSIVE.
Guardianship is actually opposing Mom ,they would have to hire a lawyer for her to show she is competant and our lawyer would have to prove she is not.
so if her lawyer proved she is competent then we would have to pay all the lawyer fees which we do not have.
Thanks Earl!
Mom is doing great! she has a calm sweet disposition. she never complains about anything!
I have found that she will do what I do and also she likes to clean, so sometimes she picks up my 13 year olds money that he lays around and she puts it in strange places.
I am so glad she has LTCI and it should last about 5 years and after that she would use her money from the sell of her house.
so right now I think we might look into ALF because we have stairs in our house and she hates them.plus I do not want her to ever fall down the stairs.
legal trouble from who?
I have proof the daughter was living off Mom and if she ever wanted to do anything about this we would Petition the Court to have her give an account of her POA.
Do you really think that the sister that has 4 DWIs ,Burglary in 2nd degree ,property damage in first degree and does not have a job would look very good in the eyes of a court?
and she probably is going to jail for a few years.
Do you think that the 1 son who is suppose to parole at the end of August ,that is in jail for Meth is going to look good in the eyes of the court?
Do you think that the other son that has been in prison for 25 years would look good in the eyes of the court?
Do you understand that Guardianship takes MONEY and TIME ?
I asked questions on this board about what to do and now you want to criticize!
there are many family members(cousins &uncles)that would testify to how bad Mom's situation was and that they know Mom is being taken care of now.
and that is what really matters!
and also the Law does say that the principal of the POA is the one who revokes the POA.and that is what Mom did and it can be proven that my husband acted IN HER BEST INTEREST.
I do not believe that the sister using Moms's money to pay for the sister(49 years old) and her son's(30) cell phone bill ($100 month) was acting in her Mom's best interest!not to mention all the other crap she did!
also we talked to an Attorney in LA. and they said that the DPOA is ok right now and that Guardianship is EXPENSIVE.
Guardianship is actually opposing Mom ,they would have to hire a lawyer for her to show she is competant and our lawyer would have to prove she is not.
so if her lawyer proved she is competent then we would have to pay all the lawyer fees which we do not have.
Thanks Earl!
Mom is doing great! she has a calm sweet disposition. she never complains about anything!
I have found that she will do what I do and also she likes to clean, so sometimes she picks up my 13 year olds money that he lays around and she puts it in strange places.
I am so glad she has LTCI and it should last about 5 years and after that she would use her money from the sell of her house.
so right now I think we might look into ALF because we have stairs in our house and she hates them.plus I do not want her to ever fall down the stairs.
Snowey, I am extremely well versed in guardianship law as I am a Plenary Legal Guardian and know EXACTLY what the court, the judges, and the court auditors & monitors do, unlike Earl who is clueless about these things (check out his posts).Snowey said:Hi yall
legal trouble from who?
I have proof the daughter was living off Mom and if she ever wanted to do anything about this we would Petition the Court to have her give an account of her POA.
Do you really think that the sister that has 4 DWIs ,Burglary in 2nd degree ,property damage in first degree and does not have a job would look very good in the eyes of a court?
and she probably is going to jail for a few years.
Do you think that the 1 son who is suppose to parole at the end of August ,that is in jail for Meth is going to look good in the eyes of the court?
Do you think that the other son that has been in prison for 25 years would look good in the eyes of the court?
Do you understand that Guardianship takes MONEY and TIME ?
I asked questions on this board about what to do and now you want to criticize!
there are many family members(cousins &uncles)that would testify to how bad Mom's situation was and that they know Mom is being taken care of now.
and that is what really matters!
and also the Law does say that the principal of the POA is the one who revokes the POA.and that is what Mom did and it can be proven that my husband acted IN HER BEST INTEREST.
I do not believe that the sister using Moms's money to pay for the sister(49 years old) and her son's(30) cell phone bill ($100 month) was acting in her Mom's best interest!not to mention all the other crap she did!
also we talked to an Attorney in LA. and they said that the DPOA is ok right now and that Guardianship is EXPENSIVE.
Guardianship is actually opposing Mom ,they would have to hire a lawyer for her to show she is competant and our lawyer would have to prove she is not.
so if her lawyer proved she is competent then we would have to pay all the lawyer fees which we do not have.
Thanks Earl!
Mom is doing great! she has a calm sweet disposition. she never complains about anything!
I have found that she will do what I do and also she likes to clean, so sometimes she picks up my 13 year olds money that he lays around and she puts it in strange places.
I am so glad she has LTCI and it should last about 5 years and after that she would use her money from the sell of her house.
so right now I think we might look into ALF because we have stairs in our house and she hates them.plus I do not want her to ever fall down the stairs.
That is why you and your husband are getting yourselves in legal trouble. Though you are trying to protect your MIL from the exploitation that is happening, what you, hubby, and Earl DO NOT understand is how the court, judges, and court auditors views things that you & hubby have done that HAVE crossed the legal line, regardless of the proof you have about hubby's criminal & flunky siblings.
Your hubby and hubby's lawyer has absolutely NO legal authorization to revoke the POA. No one can revoke the POA.
IMMEDIATELY UPON APPOINTMENT OF GUARDIANSHIP BY THE COURT IS WHAT LEGALLY REVOKES THE POA.
Here is why earl needs to stick to pouring concrete:
Guardians are NOT responsible for the legal fees of wards, unless they choose to be. Because the ward & the ward's property is under the scrunity of the court, a guardian MUST have court authorization (via a court order) to do certain things on behalf of the ward.
Already covered. Only a judge can revoke the POA via appointment of a guardian.
The court will absolutely love Snowey's husband putting his mother's money in HIS name.
Furthermore, depending on the amount of money THAT NEEDS TO BE IN A GUARDIANSHIP ACCOUNT, all the money in a CD is NOT an intelligent thing to do.
Oh, brother....please tell me how Snowey's husband can have Social Security send him his mother's SS money with a POA, earl.
Snowey, it takes 6-8 weeks for the guardianship. Ask the attorney about being reimbursed for the retainer & other costs.
Earl posting crap like he does will end his membership here.
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