Holiday Schedule

[longislandguy]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

Hi, NY doesn't have a 'standard' parenting plan so we are working together with our lawyers to write our own.

Mothers lawyer suggests:
Parties agree to share parenting time with the minor child on the following holidays:
(i) Christmas Eve;
(ii) Christmas Day;
(iii) minor child's Brithday;
(iv) Thanksgiving;
(v) Easter

My lawyers says we should go with a more specific plan:
Odd years: (Switch for Even years)
February Recess: (Mother)
Easter/Spring Recess: (Father)
Veterans Day: (Mother)
Thanksgiving Break: (Father)
December Recess: (Mother)
Christmas Day: (Father)
Friday & Monday holidays go to who ever has the weekend attached

I want to work with my ex and get along through this process, but i'm not sure her schedule is a good idea and she doesn't like mine. Do you guys have any alternative holiday schedules you can recommend?

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

Hi, NY doesn't have a 'standard' parenting plan so we are working together with our lawyers to write our own.

Mothers lawyer suggests:
Parties agree to share parenting time with the minor child on the following holidays:
(i) Christmas Eve;
(ii) Christmas Day;
(iii) minor child's Brithday;
(iv) Thanksgiving;
(v) Easter

My lawyers says we should go with a more specific plan:
Odd years: (Switch for Even years)
February Recess: (Mother)
Easter/Spring Recess: (Father)
Veterans Day: (Mother)
Thanksgiving Break: (Father)
December Recess: (Mother)
Christmas Day: (Father)
Friday & Monday holidays go to who ever has the weekend attached

I want to work with my ex and get along through this process, but i'm not sure her schedule is a good idea and she doesn't like mine. Do you guys have any alternative holiday schedules you can recommend?

Spell out dates and times of who gets what. See if your county has a standard visitation plan.

 

[stealth2]

The more specific the order is, the more enforceable it is. AND the easier it is for all.

 

[longislandguy]

You guys are really great, thank you! It's really great to have this site to bounce ideas off of! I wish i could just post the whole order and let you guys tell me what we screwed up on! But that would just be too much!

 

[CustodyKing]

You're writing your own order? Who's going to have 'legal custody'? You can go with your wives plan, but put 'in the event of a disagreement on holiday or summer scheduling, father shall have final say'

Don't tell her your adding that second part, just kinda slip it it with all the other legal custody crap.

 

[CSO286]

You're writing your own order? Who's going to have 'legal custody'? You can go with your wives plan, but put 'in the event of a disagreement on holiday or summer scheduling, father shall have final say'

Don't tell her your adding that second part, just kinda slip it it with all the other legal custody crap.

Again--used car salesman tactics.

Please stop posting.

ETA: All this guaranteesis that you'll be back in court to get a more defined holiday split if for some reason the other parent misses this clause.

 

[CSO286]

You guys are really great, thank you! It's really great to have this site to bounce ideas off of! I wish i could just post the whole order and let you guys tell me what we screwed up on! But that would just be too much!

Please, whatever you do, ignore all advice from CustodyClown--it will only cause you problems.

 

[TheGeekess]

You're writing your own order? Who's going to have 'legal custody'? You can go with your wives plan, but put 'in the event of a disagreement on holiday or summer scheduling, father shall have final say'

Don't tell her your adding that second part, just kinda slip it it with all the other legal custody crap.

So sayeth the NYCMisogynist.

 

[stealth2]

You're writing your own order? Who's going to have 'legal custody'? You can go with your wives plan, but put 'in the event of a disagreement on holiday or summer scheduling, father shall have final say'

Who said OP had more than one wife, Teech?

Don't tell her your adding that second part, just kinda slip it it with all the other legal custody crap.

OP.... I would strongly suggest NOT playing the kind of games CustodyJoker proposes. THat will only hurt the kid(s).

 

[CJane]

I really, really, really, really dislike plans that split the holidays. It virtually guarantees that the child spends most of the holiday shuttling or hurrying and also guarantees that no travel can take place.

Go with the plan that awards the holidays on an every other year basis. OR, something like my plan that awarded me every Christmas and my ex every Easter, because those had historically been the holidays we spent with my family/his family and we wanted to keep that bit of normal in the kids' lives.

 

[Ladyback1]

You're writing your own order? Who's going to have 'legal custody'? You can go with your wives plan, but put 'in the event of a disagreement on holiday or summer scheduling, father shall have final say'

Don't tell her your adding that second part, just kinda slip it it with all the other legal custody crap.

reading comprehension is NOT your strong suit is it?? OP indicated that both he and ex have attorneys. You're high (or just plain stupid) if you think Ex's attorney won't spot something just "slipped" into the order.

You are so blinded by your own arrogance, ignorance and bias that you cannot even begin to be an objective voice!
Go away!!

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NY

Hi, NY doesn't have a 'standard' parenting plan so we are working together with our lawyers to write our own.

Mothers lawyer suggests:
Parties agree to share parenting time with the minor child on the following holidays:
(i) Christmas Eve;
(ii) Christmas Day;
(iii) minor child's Brithday;
(iv) Thanksgiving;
(v) Easter

My lawyers says we should go with a more specific plan:
Odd years: (Switch for Even years)
February Recess: (Mother)
Easter/Spring Recess: (Father)
Veterans Day: (Mother)
Thanksgiving Break: (Father)
December Recess: (Mother)
Christmas Day: (Father)
Friday & Monday holidays go to who ever has the weekend attached

I want to work with my ex and get along through this process, but i'm not sure her schedule is a good idea and she doesn't like mine. Do you guys have any alternative holiday schedules you can recommend?

I don't like either of them.

If you want an example of a very comprehensive holiday schedule do a google search for the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines and check out the holiday section there. In particular look at what holidays are included, the Christmas holiday schedule. Also, Spring Break and Easter are often no where near each other date-wise, therefore they should not be considered to be the same holiday.

 

[CJane]

I don't like either of them.

If you want an example of a very comprehensive holiday schedule do a google search for the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines and check out the holiday section there. In particular look at what holidays are included, the Christmas holiday schedule. Also, Spring Break and Easter are often no where near each other date-wise, therefore they should not be considered to be the same holiday.

In many school districts, including mine, they're the same exact thing. We have only had a separate spring break ONCE, and parents hated it so much, it was removed from the calendar for upcoming years. We have Good Friday, and the Monday after Easter as Spring Break, and that's it.

We also don't have a day off school for Veteran's Day, President's Day, Columbus Day, MLK Day, or Patriot's Day. We have virtually NO Monday/Friday holidays at all.

I would suggest that Dad look at the school calendar for whatever district they anticipate the child attending school in, and work a schedule around that.

 

[LdiJ]

In many school districts, including mine, they're the same exact thing. We have only had a separate spring break ONCE, and parents hated it so much, it was removed from the calendar for upcoming years. We have Good Friday, and the Monday after Easter as Spring Break, and that's it.

We also don't have a day off school for Veteran's Day, President's Day, Columbus Day, MLK Day, or Patriot's Day. We have virtually NO Monday/Friday holidays at all.

I would suggest that Dad look at the school calendar for whatever district they anticipate the child attending school in, and work a schedule around that.

I agree with that...but I still think that the ITPG would be helpful to him as well.

 

[Ohiogal]

I don't like either of them.

If you want an example of a very comprehensive holiday schedule do a google search for the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines and check out the holiday section there. In particular look at what holidays are included, the Christmas holiday schedule. Also, Spring Break and Easter are often no where near each other date-wise, therefore they should not be considered to be the same holiday.

Actually in many places THEY ARE near each other date-wise. So you can't say Easter/Spring Break should not be considered the same holiday.

ETA: And ITPG can be helpful. I don't agree with everything in it but it can be helpful.