how do I handel this?

[seniorjudge]

Katy, I beg to differ. I know a number of people both male and female, who are "touchy" people and there's nothing sexual about it. Some people are born touchers - they need physical contact. To a certain extent I'm one myself. Not all instances of touching in the workplace are sexually based.

Quite apart from that, I also do NOT recommend writing a letter such as you describe. It's been reported to the manager - give the manager a chance to handle it before taking further steps.

"...my manager has a hand problem, I've told him already twice not to touch me. he has a thing for rubbing you on the back, he smacked me in the head once and this past weekend he flicked me on the hand. ok, i know it's not a sexual but i don't want this man touching me...."

Maybe it's just me, but I have 25 women working for me; I would not do this to any of them. First thing, I'd be a dead man. Second, this is offensive to me (and possibly to them...I don't plan on finding out).

 

[cbg]

I'm not saying it's okay for him to do this; I'm saying that Katy's assumption that it MUST be sexual on his part is incorrect.

 

[seniorjudge]

I'm not saying it's okay for him to do this; I'm saying that Katy's assumption that it MUST be sexual on his part is incorrect.

Katy said: "...ok, i know it's not a sexual but i don't want this man touching me...."

 

[cbg]

Katy also said, "however all this touching, while it hasn't gotten too out of hand (BAD PUN) - you can bet it's sexual"

 

[seniorjudge]

Katy also said, "however all this touching, while it hasn't gotten too out of hand (BAD PUN) - you can bet it's sexual"

Okay, Katy, which is it. I'm confused!

 

[Katy W.]

What I've experienced is that in a situation like this, not just hugging hello or goodbye but finding other excuses to touch, at least part of the motivation was that the "hands" person was (sexually) attracted to the other person. That has just been my experience.

Listen to CB on the letter thing, she would know better than I do what is appropriate.

 

[seniorjudge]

What I've experienced is that in a situation like this, not just hugging hello or goodbye but finding other excuses to touch, at least part of the motivation was that the "hands" person was (sexually) attracted to the other person. That has just been my experience.

Listen to CB on the letter thing, she would know better than I do what is appropriate.

I do agree with the listen to CB part; but not that other stuff. I think there are handsy people who have no sexual agenda at all. But that is not really a legal opinion!

 

[pluckey]

thank you for your responses

cat