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lostinthoughts

Junior Member
What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state?az, moving to california
I am moving to california, I am divorced with 3 young (under 5 yrs old) children that are living with my ex ( I was not able to provide the same home ( house with a yard ext...) as him ). I have to move back to our hometown in another state ( the reason is long and compicated ), we had a verbal agreement that they would move with me and he would have them every summer, plus holidays until they were in 7th grade, when we they would live with him. Now he dosent want to do this unless we change our parenting plan, something that can not change until we have had our divorce papers signed atleast a year.( We havent been divorced that long) My understanding is that it would be very unlikely that i would be allowed to remove the children from this state , even if he was ok with it, because it would be detrimental to the relationship the children have with their father. Now, I would not leave the state if I felt I had a choice, but I have to think of my other child and what is best for him. We have come to another agreement, this time in writing, that the children will live with him until they are in 7th grade, with me having visitation in the summers and the same holiday arrangments we had in our parenting agreement. in the agreement he sent it states
"I (his name) hereby agreet o the following custody changes regarding (childrens names). this change is needed because (my name) has decided to move to california and cannot abide be the current agreement. We have both come to a mutual agreemetn that we believe to be the benefit of all those concerned. the children shall live with their father(his name) until (the twins names) are ready to enter 7th grade at that time the children, including( babies name) shall live with their mother( my name). We have agreed on the following. One, Christmas and Spring Break shall alternate just as in our parenting plan. two, ( my name) will have the children every summer until they reach 7th grade at that time the children shall spend their summers with their father. Summer Breakshall start one week after school gets out to one week befor school starts. (me) will be able to visit the children any time as long as she gives a minimum of 30 days notice. (me) will be able to call and speak to the children during reasonable hours"

If i agree to this will he be able to keep the children from living with me once they reach the stated age? Also, is this something that would be approved of if we both agreed on it. this is not something i really want, but if its whats best for the kids, well as much as it hurts its what i have to do. I hate it. Any suggestions? And, yes i am selfish when it comes to my kids, who wouldnt be, but we all try to overcome our shortcomings and do whats best for them. Any suggestions/help would be greatly appreciated!!
 


lostinthoughts

Junior Member
then what can i do? I barely can make the child support payments, have nothing to sell to get a lawyer. I have to leave for my other child, his father lives back where we are moving to. All my family as well as my exs family lives there.

Are you saying that even if we both agree, with noterized signatures, the paper would have no standing in court ?
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
A contract against public policy is void on it's face. ONLY a court can change a custody order or issue one. I would strongly advise you to call your state bar association (look in the phone book for the nearest chapter) and see about attorneys in your area doing pro bono filings.
 

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