"I'll kill you before they get here"

[PayrollHRGuy]

How will that help with:

I tend to buy Men's sweats, lounge pants, jeans purely for the pockets, as I don't carry a purse.

Sorry, I thought we were still talking about the carry of guns. Had I noticed that we were talking about knives as a weapon I would have warned against their use without much training.

 

[adjusterjack]

Worthy sentiments, but a lot of women's clothing lack functional pockets. That's why we have pocketbooks.

A purse can be a formidable weapon.

 

[cbg]

A former responder here ran a non-profit organization to help victims of domestic violence. She passed away a few years ago. However, I have only recently learned that some of her tips for securing safety have been archived. Here, with Catherine's love and concern.

http://rcgnc.com/WellnesLibrary/Abu...lence Personal Safety Plan - aardvarc.org.pdf

 

[quincy]

Adding a firearm to an already-volatile home situation raises the odds that the victim of domestic abuse will be killed.

https://www.justice.gov/ovw/blog/increased-risk-domestic-violence-requires-proper-gun-safety

https://giffords.org/lawcenter/gun-laws/policy-areas/who-can-have-a-gun/domestic-violence-firearms/

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

The DOJ article while informative says nothing of the sort.

Even the anti-gun organization Gifford.org's article is talking about a gun in the home while the couple is cohabitating. And some percentage of spoken of here...
"In fact, firearms are used to commit more than half of all intimate partner homicides in the United States."
...are women who kill abusers while defending themselves.

Sure there is a chance that an abuser will take a gun away from the abused and use it on them. But the chance of that can be significantly reduced with training. And the other half of those "intimate partner homicides" were done without a gun.

A gun is a tool that requires some training to use properly but it is a great equalizer in domestic abuse cases where the woman is way more often than not smaller and physically weaker than the man.

 

[quincy]

The couple is currently cohabitating.

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

The couple is currently cohabitating.

And the OP has been advised to get the hell out and if she won't do that the gun will be of no help in the first place.

Luckily if she does get out she lives in a state that has no waiting period and she can get one right away.

 

[quincy]

I want to make sure Michelle knows that having a gun, even when safety-trained on its use, does not offer absolute protection from abuse - and she runs the very real risk of being killed by the very gun she has purchased to protect herself.

 

[stealth2]

Even the anti-gun organization Gifford.org's article is talking about a gun in the home while the couple is cohabitating. And some percentage of spoken of here...
"In fact, firearms are used to commit more than half of all intimate partner homicides in the United States."
...are women who kill abusers while defending themselves.

And what percentage would that be?

I'll answer for you (from https://www.apa.org/topics/violence/partner):

• 74 percent of all murder-suicides involved an intimate partner (spouse, common-law spouse, ex-spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend). Of these, 96 percent were women killed by their intimate partners.

 

[PayrollHRGuy]

Very little

And what percentage would that be?

I'll answer for you (from https://www.apa.org/topics/violence/partner):

I have no idea that's why I wrote "some percentage."

No, that doesn't answer the question. That is the percentage of women that are killed most of which probably didn't have a gun or the training to use it.

 

[quincy]

This really does not have to become a gun thread.

Michelle should use the domestic violence assistance resources made available to her already and she and her son should seek safe shelter if they fear for their lives.

After the boyfriend is removed from the home and a protection order is in place, Michelle can think about the wisdom of purchasing a gun - or she can inquire of the domestic violence experts about the wisdom of purchasing a gun, now or later.

Her main goal is to stay alive.

 

[Just Blue]

It would be surprising if OP didn't have a gun in the house.


1. Her recently deceased husband was a Marine.
2. She is in Texas.

 

[quincy]

It would be surprising if OP didn't have a gun in the house.


1. Her recently deceased husband was a Marine.
2. She is in Texas.

She could have one already. If so, she needs to keep it far away from her boyfriend.

 

[Mass_Shyster]

Forget the gun. OP needs to go the police NOW and report the domestic assault and battery and threatening. This may be charged as "Assault Family Violence – Choking ". Get a restraining order, and get this guy out of the house NOW!


Then, go get yourself a gun in case he ignores the restraining order and comes back.

 

[quincy]

Forget the gun. OP needs to go the police NOW and report the domestic assault and battery and threatening. This may be charged as "Assault Family Violence – Choking ". Get a restraining order, and get this guy out of the house NOW!


Then, go get yourself a gun in case he ignores the restraining order and comes back.

The most dangerous time for a victim of domestic violence is the time s/he is planning on leaving the relationship. If a police report is made - and I agree it should be - it probably shouldn’t be made until after other safety plans are in place.