international travel

[NSA4answers]

What is the name of your state? Co.

My oldest daughters father is not active in her life. He has not been for the majority of her life, does not pay child support and is supposed to appear for a contempt hearing on thrusday, however my guess is that he doesn't plan on showing up.

I tried to travel to Cozumel when my daughter was a little over 2 however the airlines would not let her board the plane. This was because of our custody orders wording. It says I have sole legal decission making responsibility after consultation with respondent. At the time I didn't even know where he was and was unable to get him to sign/notarize anything stating I could travel outside of the country on vacation with my daughter.

Short of motioning the court to change the orders so that it properly states that I have sole legal decission making, how would I go about being able to travel on vacation outside of the US with my daughter? I'd like to plan a vacation to Mexico but having lost thousands of dollars in non refundable travel costs in the past I'd like to make sure before booking that we'll be able to get on the plane this time, well.... and back into the US as well.

Thanks in advance

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? Co.

My oldest daughters father is not active in her life. He has not been for the majority of her life, does not pay child support and is supposed to appear for a contempt hearing on thrusday, however my guess is that he doesn't plan on showing up.

I tried to travel to Cozumel when my daughter was a little over 2 however the airlines would not let her board the plane. This was because of our custody orders wording. It says I have sole legal decission making responsibility after consultation with respondent. At the time I didn't even know where he was and was unable to get him to sign/notarize anything stating I could travel outside of the country on vacation with my daughter.

Short of motioning the court to change the orders so that it properly states that I have sole legal decission making, how would I go about being able to travel on vacation outside of the US with my daughter? I'd like to plan a vacation to Mexico but having lost thousands of dollars in non refundable travel costs in the past I'd like to make sure before booking that we'll be able to get on the plane this time, well.... and back into the US as well.

Thanks in advance

You need sole legal custody. That does mean sole decision making, but its important that you actually have sole legal custody.

 

[nextwife]

In the meantime, if you want a Caribbean vacation, try Puerto Rico. Or the US Virgin Islands.

"Travel within United States and USVI unaffected by Western Hemisphere Initiative"

 

[Ohiogal]

You need sole legal custody. That does mean sole decision making, but its important that you actually have sole legal custody.

And quite frankly it would be best if the court order states that mom has sole discretion regarding the children on travel outside the United States and gives her permission to take the children outside the country. That way there is no argument that sole legal custody is not enough. Because she may still have issues.

 

[NSA4answers]

And quite frankly it would be best if the court order states that mom has sole discretion regarding the children on travel outside the United States and gives her permission to take the children outside the country. That way there is no argument that sole legal custody is not enough. Because she may still have issues.

Okie dokie... I've been told a thousand times what Ld and OG have said. The only reason it hasn't been done is because this is the only time that this has ever become an issue. (In regards to international travel.) And sometimes I feel like it's better to leave well enough alone. Right now he has supervised visitation, and has never (not once) done it since the order was adopted in 1999. If I were to ask for sole custody/decision making, would I be able to request that there be no visitation considering he has not done it anyways?

 

[Zigner]

Okie dokie... I've been told a thousand times what Ld and OG have said. The only reason it hasn't been done is because this is the only time that this has ever become an issue. (In regards to international travel.) And sometimes I feel like it's better to leave well enough alone. Right now he has supervised visitation, and has never (not once) done it since the order was adopted in 1999. If I were to ask for sole custody/decision making, would I be able to request that there be no visitation considering he has not done it anyways?

You could - but why rock the boat?

 

[Humusluvr]

Okie dokie... I've been told a thousand times what Ld and OG have said. The only reason it hasn't been done is because this is the only time that this has ever become an issue. (In regards to international travel.) And sometimes I feel like it's better to leave well enough alone. Right now he has supervised visitation, and has never (not once) done it since the order was adopted in 1999. If I were to ask for sole custody/decision making, would I be able to request that there be no visitation considering he has not done it anyways?

So, what you are saying is that by going back to court to request this one thing, he'll come back into your lives and start visiting.

I guess it depends on how bad you need the international travel thing. How much does it mean to you? what do you think it will mean to him?

 

[Ohiogal]

And there is nothing wrong if he actually decides to start visiting according to the custody decree.

 

[NSA4answers]

So, what you are saying is that by going back to court to request this one thing, he'll come back into your lives and start visiting.

I guess it depends on how bad you need the international travel thing. How much does it mean to you? what do you think it will mean to him?

I dont necessarily NEED an international vacation persay. I'd like one though, I'd like to be able to give my kids that experience. And it means nothing to him. Unfortunately nothing has ever meant anything to him in regards to our 9 year old daughter.

He doesn't want to see her. He's been able to for the last 9 years and hasn't even made an attempt to. I am very close with his sister and her family. They live in another state and we saw them more times in 2007 alone than my daughters father has seen her in his entire life.

Like another poster said... I could request sole custody etc etc. But why rock the boat? It's a bunch of time and effort that I don't want to put forth to change something that is for the majority not a problem anyways. This is the only area where the wording of my orders has been a problem. It's time off I'd have to take from work, money out of my pocket, and more than likely he wouldn't even show up anyway, and a whole bunch of unneeded stress.

I was looking mostly for a way to obtain this permission from the court with out actually having to change the orders all together.

 

[nextwife]

Don't take it to court. First see if he'll sign a letter in front of a notary agreeing to such travel.

And there's still Puerto Rico and the USVIs.

 

[Zigner]

Like another poster said... I could request sole custody etc etc. But why rock the boat?

That's NOT what I said. My "rock the boat" comment was related to you seeking to take away visitation.
If I were in the same situation, I'd petition the court for a specific order allowing you to take the child on vacations out of the country without having to consult with the child's father. I wouldn't touch the visitation issue under these circumstances.

 

[NSA4answers]

That's NOT what I said. My "rock the boat" comment was related to you seeking to take away visitation.

Oh gotchya. I wouldn't necessarily "take it away." and don't need to as he doesn't do it anyway... more so wondering if it's better that our order say he doesn't have visitation than have it and have him not use it. I worded that wrong I guess.

If I were in the same situation, I'd petition the court for a specific order allowing you to take the child on vacations out of the country without having to consult with the child's father. I wouldn't touch the visitation issue under these circumstances.

Ok, that's what I was wondering if was possible. I didn't know if I could do that or if I actually had to change the order to state that I have sole legal decision making. Would I use just a general motion form stating what I want and why it's in my daughters best interest to be able to do?

 

[NSA4answers]

Don't take it to court. First see if he'll sign a letter in front of a notary agreeing to such travel.

And there's still Puerto Rico and the USVIs.

He's in jail, from what his sister tells me. Driving with out a license I guess. (word through the grape vine though, we are not quite sure.) He's suppose to appear tomorrow in court in Minnesotta for contempt for not paying child support. I imagine, from what the woman handling the case in their county told me, if he doesn't show up, they will issue a bench warrant. But if he does show up he is looking at 160 days in jail if he agrees to be/is found in contempt anyways. My understanding is if you're in jail you can't sign things for a notary anyway.... am I wrong?

 

[Humusluvr]

My dad is a notary, and I just asked him if he could go to a jail and notarize things for an inmate. He looked at me like I was bonkers - but he said he could..... so.....

In my non-lawyery-ness, it sounds like the notarized letter is a possibility.

 

[nextwife]

He's in jail, from what his sister tells me. Driving with out a license I guess. (word through the grape vine though, we are not quite sure.) He's suppose to appear tomorrow in court in Minnesotta for contempt for not paying child support. I imagine, from what the woman handling the case in their county told me, if he doesn't show up, they will issue a bench warrant. But if he does show up he is looking at 160 days in jail if he agrees to be/is found in contempt anyways. My understanding is if you're in jail you can't sign things for a notary anyway.... am I wrong?

You're wrong. I've handled real estate closings where we've needed to get docs to the jail to be signed. And yes, they were notarized.