Is this Attorney for real or am I just to paranoided of losing my daughter?

[herwords]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Nebraska

I am currently going through a custody battle. We have just went through the temporary custody hearing but havent' gotten an answer back from the judge on that yet. My ex and I currently have joint custody with him having primary physical possesion of our daughter but in all actuality I have had her in my care 85% of the time since our divorce 4 1/2yrs ago do to his job and working out of state so much. I never deny him visits and we use to get along great. The only reason I took him back to court was just to redu the modification of decree but he made a stink about it. Why? I don't know. I even told him I didn't want his money, if he thought I was going after child support, cause he has never had to pay. I was just trying to protect myself since he got remarried is all.
Here is my problem

I am not sure my current attorney is doing all she is actually capable to do for me and I fear for my case and my daughter.

Example 1: I was so excited about the temp. court hearing date so that the ex couldn't hold my daughter against me anymore, cause I figured I would win since I am the one who has raised my daughter. Wrong-judges usually don't change the original decree in a temp case unless there is eminit danger to the child. She didn't tell me this until 3 days after the hearing. Talk about shoot my hopes down. Why couldn't she tell me at the very start?

Example 2: Since this all started my ex is trying to keep my daughter from me. He is only letting me have my daughter on weekends. I asked my attorney what I can do. She suggested to said a visitation letter to his attorney. I said that would be wonderful. She forget to mention to me that, they didn't have to respond or do anything with that letter and I assumed they did. She charged me almost $100 to write that letter and nothing came out of it.

Example 3: She gave my ex 30 days from being served with papers to respond or the court might find him at fault, etc.....Well I finally called my attorney when they were 35days late cause she hadn't called me. She said owe since we have a temp custody hearing in 2 1/2 weeks I am not going to make a big stink about it. AAAHHHHHHHHHHH, wouldn't this have been a bonus for me?

Example 4: During my initial consultation with her I am thinking this should have rang a bell for me not to go with her on this case but would prefer others opinions. I have to use her on another case in which she didn't have to do much so she did fine. I said to her when I was talking about my ex "yah my ex husband thinks he can buy his way into winning custody" and her come back was "well he can" "this is going to cost a lot of money and if he has more money he will probably will if he carries it out farther then you". I said no what I meant was "he thinks his money can get anyone or anything to lie for him to win" then she said nothing.

Example 5: My ex's new wife seems very nice, she has always been wonderful to my daughter and my daughter loves her(thats the most important) When I go to pick up my daughter I even tell my daughter to make sure she gives ****** a hug and a kiss. Heres the problem. The sm had 2kids from a previous marriage and she got them stripped from her and for what reason I don't know. It could have been something very minor cause I know she hasn't shown any sign of harm to my daughter but I would still like it checked out and have my attorney find out why she got her kids stripped from her. I trust very easily and one day I may get slapped in the face and on that day I don't want it involving my daughter so I want all my steps protected. Well my attorney said she will try and look but its not a big issue to her. AAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhh, how can it not be?

Example 6: My attorney wants my ex's records like tax's, driving, etc. but she wants me to get them. Now how am I suppose to get those? With the new hippa laws plus I feel I would be invading his privacy. If my attorney was to get them then she would be the only one reading them and getting the info she needed. Why won't she do this? Is this normal?
She hasn't even requested for my daughters medical records yet and I keep telling her there is lots of evidence within them, yet nothing.

So I am stuck. Do I stick it out with this attorney and hope for the best or can I switch attorneys without looking bad infront of the court system?
I don't want to lose my daughter from something a simple as modifing and she is turning it into that from what I believe but I could use every and anyones opinions please.
Thanks

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Nebraska

I am currently going through a custody battle. We have just went through the temporary custody hearing but havent' gotten an answer back from the judge on that yet. My ex and I currently have joint custody with him having primary physical possesion of our daughter but in all actuality I have had her in my care 85% of the time since our divorce 4 1/2yrs ago do to his job and working out of state so much. I never deny him visits and we use to get along great. The only reason I took him back to court was just to redu the modification of decree but he made a stink about it. Why? I don't know. I even told him I didn't want his money, if he thought I was going after child support, cause he has never had to pay. I was just trying to protect myself since he got remarried is all.
Here is my problem

My personal opinion is that you need a new attorney. If you have had your child basically 85% of the time your attorney is doing a BAD job of this case.
I am not sure my current attorney is doing all she is actually capable to do for me and I fear for my case and my daughter.

Example 1: I was so excited about the temp. court hearing date so that the ex couldn't hold my daughter against me anymore, cause I figured I would win since I am the one who has raised my daughter. Wrong-judges usually don't change the original decree in a temp case unless there is eminit danger to the child. She didn't tell me this until 3 days after the hearing. Talk about shoot my hopes down. Why couldn't she tell me at the very start?

Example 2: Since this all started my ex is trying to keep my daughter from me. He is only letting me have my daughter on weekends. I asked my attorney what I can do. She suggested to said a visitation letter to his attorney. I said that would be wonderful. She forget to mention to me that, they didn't have to respond or do anything with that letter and I assumed they did. She charged me almost $100 to write that letter and nothing came out of it.

Example 3: She gave my ex 30 days from being served with papers to respond or the court might find him at fault, etc.....Well I finally called my attorney when they were 35days late cause she hadn't called me. She said owe since we have a temp custody hearing in 2 1/2 weeks I am not going to make a big stink about it. AAAHHHHHHHHHHH, wouldn't this have been a bonus for me?

Example 4: During my initial consultation with her I am thinking this should have rang a bell for me not to go with her on this case but would prefer others opinions. I have to use her on another case in which she didn't have to do much so she did fine. I said to her when I was talking about my ex "yah my ex husband thinks he can buy his way into winning custody" and her come back was "well he can" "this is going to cost a lot of money and if he has more money he will probably will if he carries it out farther then you". I said no what I meant was "he thinks his money can get anyone or anything to lie for him to win" then she said nothing.

Example 5: My ex's new wife seems very nice, she has always been wonderful to my daughter and my daughter loves her(thats the most important) When I go to pick up my daughter I even tell my daughter to make sure she gives ****** a hug and a kiss. Heres the problem. The sm had 2kids from a previous marriage and she got them stripped from her and for what reason I don't know. It could have been something very minor cause I know she hasn't shown any sign of harm to my daughter but I would still like it checked out and have my attorney find out why she got her kids stripped from her. I trust very easily and one day I may get slapped in the face and on that day I don't want it involving my daughter so I want all my steps protected. Well my attorney said she will try and look but its not a big issue to her. AAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhh, how can it not be?

Example 6: My attorney wants my ex's records like tax's, driving, etc. but she wants me to get them. Now how am I suppose to get those? With the new hippa laws plus I feel I would be invading his privacy. If my attorney was to get them then she would be the only one reading them and getting the info she needed. Why won't she do this? Is this normal?
She hasn't even requested for my daughters medical records yet and I keep telling her there is lots of evidence within them, yet nothing.

So I am stuck. Do I stick it out with this attorney and hope for the best or can I switch attorneys without looking bad infront of the court system?
I don't want to lose my daughter from something a simple as modifing and she is turning it into that from what I believe but I could use every and anyones opinions please.
Thanks[/QUOTE

I think you need a new attorney...

 

[Inquiry123]

I agree...

You have identified a couple of Red Flags. You are right to be concerned.

I would consult with a couple of other attorneys who specialize in Family Law. Find one that is able to FIGHT and WORK for you.

In every profession, there are individuals of varying degrees of ability...find one that you feel comfortable with -- you will have to live with the results. Good luck.

 

[scaredmom123]

I would RUN to find a new attorney. I recently had to aquire a new attorney in a modification case also. This has cost me a substancial amount of money because now I had to pay two retainers. But, I would rather lose the money than lose my daughter!!

 

[hayley"s mom]

You definitely should get a new attorney, if she says your ex can buy a vote that just doesn't sound right to me, and who gives a rats ass what anybody thinks, when you retain an attorney they are suppose to fight for YOU!!!!!!
Even in a murder trial if an attorney knows for a fact their client did it, but their client wants to get off, they have to defend them to the best of there ability, right.... I'm gonna pay my attorney to fight for me, if I don't feel like they are doing there job then they are fired and I'm turning them into the bar association or whatever, I definitely am not going to endorse them to anybody else. It's about our kids not about the "benjamins" right. It makes me sick my ex always tells me "money talks and bull**** walks" but I think you should run not walk and find a new attorney, before yours does anymore damage to you or your wallet! Good Luck

 

[SMURFEELAW]

I agree that a new attorney may be in order but keep in mind that firing this one and asking for another would put you in the position of most likely needing a continuance and thus waiting longer to be with your daughter other than the weekends.

Just a few questions

How do you know the new wifes children were "stripped" from her, could she not have given custody over, adopted them out etc?

Why did dad get primary and what are the original visitation orders? Can you PROVE you have had the child 85% of the time?

 

[herwords]

I agree that a new attorney may be in order but keep in mind that firing this one and asking for another would put you in the position of most likely needing a continuance and thus waiting longer to be with your daughter other than the weekends.

Just a few questions

How do you know the new wifes children were "stripped" from her, could she not have given custody over, adopted them out etc?

Why did dad get primary and what are the original visitation orders? Can you PROVE you have had the child 85% of the time?

Thank You and Yes I have taken that into consideration. I have asked around & people have told me she is good but slow. One lady I just became friends with. I asked her if she knew of a good attorney and she asked who I had now. She laughed and said don't lose her. My ex had her and got everything. So I think I am just wanting it all done and over like yesterday and it just doesn't happen that way.

As for my ex's new wife. My ex and I use to have great communication. He actually told me she had them stripped but left it at that. They have only been together 14months(that includes dating and marriage). She hasn't had her kids once. They live in a different state.

As for the original visitation order. I couldn't afford and attorney when we divorced and we were civil and tried to agree but I got blind sided. I agreed on joint custody but didn't realize the primary physical rights meant so much, though he hasn't used those rights. He only used them for 3months after the divorce then I got her and have had her. He has her now just because he is being a jerk through this fight and he is holding her against me. I only get her on weekends but my attorney said that hurting him because he isn't corporating.

The 85%. I have never put a number or percentage on it. I have a stack of papers about a foot high of just documents showing I have had her yes. As for the 85%. That I am not positive. My ex works out of state most of the time but when he was home for visits I never stopped him from seeing his daughter. But as far as Dr.s, Dentist, School, you name I have the record of it. He has only been to about 3 of her appointments in the past 4 1/2yrs due to his job has him gone.

Well I hope this explains a litte. Thanks Again

 

[Phnx02]

What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Nebraska

I am currently going through a custody battle. We have just went through the temporary custody hearing but havent' gotten an answer back from the judge on that yet. My ex and I currently have joint custody with him having primary physical possesion of our daughter but in all actuality I have had her in my care 85% of the time since our divorce 4 1/2yrs ago do to his job and working out of state so much. I never deny him visits and we use to get along great. The only reason I took him back to court was just to redu the modification of decree but he made a stink about it. Why? I don't know. I even told him I didn't want his money, if he thought I was going after child support, cause he has never had to pay. I was just trying to protect myself since he got remarried is all.
Here is my problem

I am not sure my current attorney is doing all she is actually capable to do for me and I fear for my case and my daughter.

Example 1: I was so excited about the temp. court hearing date so that the ex couldn't hold my daughter against me anymore, cause I figured I would win since I am the one who has raised my daughter. Wrong-judges usually don't change the original decree in a temp case unless there is eminit danger to the child. She didn't tell me this until 3 days after the hearing. Talk about shoot my hopes down. Why couldn't she tell me at the very start?

Example 2: Since this all started my ex is trying to keep my daughter from me. He is only letting me have my daughter on weekends. I asked my attorney what I can do. She suggested to said a visitation letter to his attorney. I said that would be wonderful. She forget to mention to me that, they didn't have to respond or do anything with that letter and I assumed they did. She charged me almost $100 to write that letter and nothing came out of it.

Example 3: She gave my ex 30 days from being served with papers to respond or the court might find him at fault, etc.....Well I finally called my attorney when they were 35days late cause she hadn't called me. She said owe since we have a temp custody hearing in 2 1/2 weeks I am not going to make a big stink about it. AAAHHHHHHHHHHH, wouldn't this have been a bonus for me?

Example 4: During my initial consultation with her I am thinking this should have rang a bell for me not to go with her on this case but would prefer others opinions. I have to use her on another case in which she didn't have to do much so she did fine. I said to her when I was talking about my ex "yah my ex husband thinks he can buy his way into winning custody" and her come back was "well he can" "this is going to cost a lot of money and if he has more money he will probably will if he carries it out farther then you". I said no what I meant was "he thinks his money can get anyone or anything to lie for him to win" then she said nothing.

Example 5: My ex's new wife seems very nice, she has always been wonderful to my daughter and my daughter loves her(thats the most important) When I go to pick up my daughter I even tell my daughter to make sure she gives ****** a hug and a kiss. Heres the problem. The sm had 2kids from a previous marriage and she got them stripped from her and for what reason I don't know. It could have been something very minor cause I know she hasn't shown any sign of harm to my daughter but I would still like it checked out and have my attorney find out why she got her kids stripped from her. I trust very easily and one day I may get slapped in the face and on that day I don't want it involving my daughter so I want all my steps protected. Well my attorney said she will try and look but its not a big issue to her. AAAAAAAAhhhhhhhhhhhh, how can it not be?

Example 6: My attorney wants my ex's records like tax's, driving, etc. but she wants me to get them. Now how am I suppose to get those? With the new hippa laws plus I feel I would be invading his privacy. If my attorney was to get them then she would be the only one reading them and getting the info she needed. Why won't she do this? Is this normal?
She hasn't even requested for my daughters medical records yet and I keep telling her there is lots of evidence within them, yet nothing.

So I am stuck. Do I stick it out with this attorney and hope for the best or can I switch attorneys without looking bad infront of the court system?
I don't want to lose my daughter from something a simple as modifing and she is turning it into that from what I believe but I could use every and anyones opinions please.
Thanks

In your last message to this post, you say your current attorney used to be your ex's attorney? This is a huge confict of interest! I'm surprised she even took your case. You need to weigh out all the pro's & con's of keeping her or finding a new attorney. You need an attorney that is working for you, and only you.....not taking your ex into consideration, and "fights with gusto" on your behalf.

Years ago, I fired my first attorney when he always suggested I just agree to everything my ex wanted because "he seems like a good guy" to telling me he didn't want to "piss off" my ex's attorney. Hello.......who's the guy working for anyways!?!?

Yes, attorney's will write a simple letter or make a phone call, and charge you up the yang-yang for it. Don't expect them to ever do anything as a courtesy. That's just not the way they do business. Most lawyers have a digital watch attached to their phone and computer, and will charge you down to the minute for every little thing they do.

It's silly to ask YOU to get his tax and pay records. Of course, you can't do this. She can, but expect to be charged for it. If you know his new wife lost her kids at some time in the past, I would defiantely look into the reason why. If it was due to child abuse or neglect, drugs or alcohol problems.....you will want to know this! You will not want your daughter sent into this person's care, even if she seems "recovered". The reason why she doens't have custody of her kids may be very important information in your custody case. Since your're worried about legal bills, play detective yourself to see if you can get this info.