Is this harassment? Runaway situation

[Doughmama]

You don't have total knowledge either. YOU have YOUR opinion of what went in your daughter's boyfriend's house. So consider that. I am telling you right now that you are asking for trouble because your daughter or you know more than you are sharing with the family about where your daughter's boyfriend is located. My instincts are right more than they are wrong.

And how do you know the boy has written his family and the sheriff letters? Because quite frankly that would NOT have been shared with you unless... Yeah I am my reasons... You and your daughter are in this way too deep and it may end up with you or her or both being charged with felonies.

I know what went on in the home because his parents told me, he told me, and I observed. We were friends with the family.

I knew about the letters because his mother wrote a Facebook post saying they got a letter and the sheriff got a letter.

Come on... I seriously am not the enemy. Nor is my daughter. I had​ a valid question about whether or not I had rights to protect my family. I'm not one bit concerned with what they find... I invited the cops in my house for heaven's sake! I said it above... I have been cooperating. I have been to the cops on my own accord to which they said... Ma'am... We aren't even looking for him. If he wants to come home he will. So the visitors I keep getting are NOT the cops! It is a hired PI the parents are handling....

So I have NO RIGHTS? I cooperate with law officials, have tried to help with what little knowledge we have, and am completely open whenever I've been questioned.... It's okay for privately hired people to still just hang out around my house, on private property because they want to?

 

[Ohiogal]

I know what went on in the home because his parents told me, he told me, and I observed. We were friends with the family.

I knew about the letters because his mother wrote a Facebook post saying they got a letter and the sheriff got a letter.

Come on... I seriously am not the enemy. Nor is my daughter. I had​ a valid question about whether or not I had rights to protect my family. I'm not one bit concerned with what they find... I invited the cops in my house for heaven's sake! I said it above... I have been cooperating. I have been to the cops on my own accord to which they said... Ma'am... We aren't even looking for him. If he wants to come home he will. So the visitors I keep getting are NOT the cops! It is a hired PI the parents are handling....

So I have NO RIGHTS? I cooperate with law officials, have tried to help with what little knowledge we have, and am completely open whenever I've been questioned.... It's okay for privately hired people to still just hang out around my house, on private property because they want to?

They are not hanging on "private property". They are on a PUBLIC street. Deal with it. They aren't in your driveway or on YOUR private property. You have no recourse.

 

[Doughmama]

They are not hanging on "private property". They are on a PUBLIC street. Deal with it. They aren't in your driveway or on YOUR private property. You have no recourse.

It is my private property... We own the road to my house. It is far off the main road. And sitting at my gate is actually 50 yards on my property. There is even a private property sign. The gate is set back from the actual line. They are sitting right at my gate...

 

[stealth2]

So have you reported this surveillance to the local authorities?

 

[Doughmama]

So have you reported this surveillance to the local authorities?

Yes... They were the ones who told me to put a lock on my gate and put signs up. I just don't know how far to push it or what to do... I don't want trouble. Just my kids to feel safe if it was just me I wouldn't care to just deal with it...

 

[eerelations]

Have you put a lock on the gate? Have you posted signs? (A note on the signs - they should be at the entry to your property, not at the gate.)

 

[Doughmama]

Have you put a lock on the gate? Have you posted signs? (A note on the signs - they should be at the entry to your property, not at the gate.)

Thank you for addressing the actual problem. We have put a lock on the gate per the sheriff's office guidance. Good point on the signs... they are close to the gate. We will go move them.
Any advice on what I should actually do? If they continue onto my property to the gate (One way drive with no turn around) do I call the police, take pictures for proof, etc? Then what? I don't want to seem like a whining nelly but at the same time my kids sanity is very important. We have never had any issue with people on our drive so this is unnerving for them, hence the post. I don't know what I can actually do legally or if I should.

Thank you for trying to help, I appreciate the questions directly related to my question.

 

[stealth2]

How old are your kids? I guess I'm not seeing why they are so afraid/upset that there is a car outside of your locked gate... Have you explained to them that sissy's b/f is missing, so his parents are trying to find them and think Sissy knows where he is? That you would be looking for them just as hard if they were missing, and it will all blow over soon.

Since your gate is locked and you have No Trespassing signs, you most certainly could call the police and report the trespassing. Me? I'd likely kill them with kindness. Bring them coffee in the morning, maybe bake them some cookies. Wave and say hello any time you pass them.

 

[Doughmama]

How old are your kids? I guess I'm not seeing why they are so afraid/upset that there is a car outside of your locked gate... Have you explained to them that sissy's b/f is missing, so his parents are trying to find them and think Sissy knows where he is? That you would be looking for them just as hard if they were missing, and it will all blow over soon.

Since your gate is locked and you have No Trespassing signs, you most certainly could call the police and report the trespassing. Me? I'd likely kill them with kindness. Bring them coffee in the morning, maybe bake them some cookies. Wave and say hello any time you pass them.

I like the way you think my youngest is 7 and go up to 17. My teens don't worry as much it's just annoying and they ask why they won't leave us alone... The littles are the ones who have been unnerved. Coming home to an open gate on more than one occasion, barn doors open, shed doors open and rummaged through...But nothing missing. That scared​ them (teens didn't like it either). We've never had a trespasser much less an invasion of privacy. We have explained​ why the people were around and they understand. They are really missing the boy too so they get it... It really just boils down to enough being enough in regards to the presence. For example... One night my 13 year old went to open the gate to be sweet for my husband when he saw lights coming down the road... When he got close to the gate a man stepped out of his vehicle and turned spotlights on our property. My son had to hide behind a tree. That scared him to be so close to a stranger who was violating our privacy, all because he wanted to surprise his dad and have the gate opened. Granted he doesn't carry the fear with him like the littles do, but home is here you feel safe, and the security is being messed with.

 

[Ohiogal]

I like the way you think my youngest is 7 and go up to 17. My teens don't worry as much it's just annoying and they ask why they won't leave us alone... The littles are the ones who have been unnerved. Coming home to an open gate on more than one occasion, barn doors open, shed doors open and rummaged through...But nothing missing. That scared​ them (teens didn't like it either). We've never had a trespasser much less an invasion of privacy. We have explained​ why the people were around and they understand. They are really missing the boy too so they get it... It really just boils down to enough being enough in regards to the presence. For example... One night my 13 year old went to open the gate to be sweet for my husband when he saw lights coming down the road... When he got close to the gate a man stepped out of his vehicle and turned spotlights on our property. My son had to hide behind a tree. That scared him to be so close to a stranger who was violating our privacy, all because he wanted to surprise his dad and have the gate opened. Granted he doesn't carry the fear with him like the littles do, but home is here you feel safe, and the security is being messed with.

You have given them no reason to believe you aren't hiding the child. Why? Because you have been extremely negative about the parents. What if someone said you were a horrible sucky parent . You deserve to be treated like a criminal because of YOUR attitude towards the parents who are missing the child. Maybe your daughter should disappear. I bet you wouldn't look at all anywhere for her. After all she is old enough. Therefore, if you looked for her, you are pathetic because YOU should let her go. Just like you think her boyfriend's parents should do.

 

[Doughmama]

You have given them no reason to believe you aren't hiding the child. Why? Because you have been extremely negative about the parents. What if someone said you were a horrible sucky parent . You deserve to be treated like a criminal because of YOUR attitude towards the parents who are missing the child. Maybe your daughter should disappear. I bet you wouldn't look at all anywhere for her. After all she is old enough. Therefore, if you looked for her, you are pathetic because YOU should let her go. Just like you think her boyfriend's parents should do.

OH NO? Then you are a hypocrite.

You, Ohiogal, are a very hateful person. Maybe this struck a nerve with you, maybe your child ranaway from you and that is why you consistently feel the need to speak on a situation where your views are completely out of line. Since you have no way of knowing the entirety of the situation and all we have been through in regards to this family and what is going on now... I will choose to have grace. I will have grace because I don't know what you have gone through that has made you so biligerent. I don't need your negativity and mean words. I think you need a little Jesus in your life. Seriously...I hope you don't respond to all posts like you have mine. I see you are a senior member with 50K posts. Please tell me you have had a little compassion in your writing to the rest of the world. Spreading hate the way you are is uncalled for. If all you do is sit around and bash people then I think you need to turn your computer off and open your bible... God can help you be a nice person. Do something good for our country, but better yet do something good for your soul and please turn the hate off.

... and yes, I will pray for you. If you would like help seeking God feel free to message me. I don't hate back.

PS... negativity toward something I know for truth doesn't constitute guilt or a reason I/my family should endure our safety feeling tampered with. Negativity about people who have continually hurt my family is justified, we lived it. I am not hurting them back, I don't have their child, and they don't have rights over me just because of the situation. If your logic was true...negativity = guilt, then how many things would you be guilty of I wonder? Think about it.

and yes, if my child begged and told me they couldn't live with me anymore and had to leave... BECAUSE I LOVE MY CHILD I would find a safe place for the child to live. Why? So they wouldn't run away. So I would know the kid was safe. My heart would be eternally broken but out of love for my child I would find them safety if they could no longer live with me and we could not resolve the problems. That... is what I would do before my child ran away.

 

[LdiJ]

You, Ohiogal, are a very hateful person. Maybe this struck a nerve with you, maybe your child ranaway from you and that is why you consistently feel the need to speak on a situation where your views are completely out of line. Since you have no way of knowing the entirety of the situation and all we have been through in regards to this family and what is going on now... I will choose to have grace. I will have grace because I don't know what you have gone through that has made you so biligerent. I don't need your negativity and mean words. I think you need a little Jesus in your life. Seriously...I hope you don't respond to all posts like you have mine. I see you are a senior member with 50K posts. Please tell me you have had a little compassion in your writing to the rest of the world. Spreading hate the way you are is uncalled for. If all you do is sit around and bash people then I think you need to turn your computer off and open your bible... God can help you be a nice person. Do something good for our country, but better yet do something good for your soul and please turn the hate off.

... and yes, I will pray for you. If you would like help seeking God feel free to message me. I don't hate back.

PS... negativity toward something I know for truth doesn't constitute guilt or a reason I/my family should endure our safety feeling tampered with. Negativity about people who have continually hurt my family is justified, we lived it. I am not hurting them back, I don't have their child, and they don't have rights over me just because of the situation. If your logic was true...negativity = guilt, then how many things would you be guilty of I wonder? Think about it.

and yes, if my child begged and told me they couldn't live with me anymore and had to leave... BECAUSE I LOVE MY CHILD I would find a safe place for the child to live. Why? So they wouldn't run away. So I would know the kid was safe. My heart would be eternally broken but out of love for my child I would find them safety if they could no longer live with me and we could not resolve the problems. That... is what I would do before my child ran away.

Ok, the reality of things is that you simply do not understand the legalities of family law...however, that is immaterial to the issue of your family's safety and privacy.

Do you have any idea who the PI's are? You could go for a restraining order against them if you do? Please get a consult with local attorney about getting restraining orders. Your children do deserve to feel safe. None of this is their fault or problem.

 

[Ohiogal]

You, Ohiogal, are a very hateful person. Maybe this struck a nerve with you, maybe your child ranaway from you and that is why you consistently feel the need to speak on a situation where your views are completely out of line. Since you have no way of knowing the entirety of the situation and all we have been through in regards to this family and what is going on now... I will choose to have grace. I will have grace because I don't know what you have gone through that has made you so biligerent. I don't need your negativity and mean words. I think you need a little Jesus in your life. Seriously...I hope you don't respond to all posts like you have mine. I see you are a senior member with 50K posts. Please tell me you have had a little compassion in your writing to the rest of the world. Spreading hate the way you are is uncalled for. If all you do is sit around and bash people then I think you need to turn your computer off and open your bible... God can help you be a nice person. Do something good for our country, but better yet do something good for your soul and please turn the hate off.

... and yes, I will pray for you. If you would like help seeking God feel free to message me. I don't hate back.

PS... negativity toward something I know for truth doesn't constitute guilt or a reason I/my family should endure our safety feeling tampered with. Negativity about people who have continually hurt my family is justified, we lived it. I am not hurting them back, I don't have their child, and they don't have rights over me just because of the situation. If your logic was true...negativity = guilt, then how many things would you be guilty of I wonder? Think about it.

and yes, if my child begged and told me they couldn't live with me anymore and had to leave... BECAUSE I LOVE MY CHILD I would find a safe place for the child to live. Why? So they wouldn't run away. So I would know the kid was safe. My heart would be eternally broken but out of love for my child I would find them safety if they could no longer live with me and we could not resolve the problems. That... is what I would do before my child ran away.

Nope. Not a hateful person. I have dealt with MANY runaway children -- as an attorney GAL who represents the child. I stand by what I stated.

 

[Doughmama]

Ok, the reality of things is that you simply do not understand the legalities of family law...however, that is immaterial to the issue of your family's safety and privacy.

Do you have any idea who the PI's are? You could go for a restraining order against them if you do? Please get a consult with local attorney about getting restraining orders. Your children do deserve to feel safe. None of this is their fault or problem.

No I have no knowledge of family law. This is my first encounter with anything remotely like this and my first experience talking to law officers. That is why I have followed through with everything I could. They aren't my enemy they are just trying to do their job. I get it... The reason for the post was to get advice and I truly appreciate you weeding through the jumble of posts and offering up ideas and understanding my viewpoint in regards to my children. I never thought about a restraining order for the PI's, I will definitely look into that. I really was not sure where PI's stood in the law enforcement scope which is why I was confused as to how to proceed. I don't know who they are but I will walk down and find out next time they come to my house. Thanks for the direction.

 

[Doughmama]

Nope. Not a hateful person. I have dealt with MANY runaway children -- as an attorney GAL who represents the child. I stand by what I stated.

Well I would suggest next time you run across a post you don't like... move along. Offer up your services to posts that you can maintain civility and compassion for the person and situation instead of imposing your view and salty behavior. You made the choice to jump on my thread and "deal with me." I didn't force you to comment or get involved. If it is so difficult to be nice, just do one thing when the need arises to spill your jagged words on a screen... pick your hands up. Leave the keyboard alone and choose a thread more suited to keeping a balanced demeanor.

A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of. Luke 6:45


I do hope you have a good day.