joint custody

[armymedic1]

My ex and I have joint custody of a 7 year old. I have him Monday - Friday and he has him Friday night to Monday morning. I have to go away on a course and I want my son to continue to come here to my home with his brother and sister and his step-father. I will be gone for 2 1/2 months. My ex says he wants him full time while I am gone. Can he do that or can I keep things the way they are? The custody order is actually one week on and one week off but because my ex is in school, we agreed to the change.

 

[sirxamiel]

My ex and I have joint custody of a 7 year old. I have him Monday - Friday and he has him Friday night to Monday morning. I have to go away on a course and I want my son to continue to come here to my home with his brother and sister and his step-father. I will be gone for 2 1/2 months. My ex says he wants him full time while I am gone. Can he do that or can I keep things the way they are? The custody order is actually one week on and one week off but because my ex is in school, we agreed to the change.

Regardless if you are gone, the order states what he has to do. If you dont want him to go full time with him, then he cannot do anything about it. He can however, get the child as it is written in the order,1 week with you, and 1 week with him. If you deny him that, then he can file for contempt. If he doesnt bring the child back to your home, regardless if you are there or not, then he will be in contempt. What does the child want to do? If the child wants to stay with his dad, then just by reading your post, it seems to me that you guys are reasonable to each other. If that is so, then I would suggest you 2 get together and ask the child. BUT DONT ARGUE IN FRONT OF THE CHILD!!! Both of you need to assure the child that both of you respect his decision as to where the child is to stay. But if you two cannot come to an agreement, then by law you both have to follow the order.

 

[LdiJ]

Regardless if you are gone, the order states what he has to do. If you dont want him to go full time with him, then he cannot do anything about it. He can however, get the child as it is written in the order,1 week with you, and 1 week with him. If you deny him that, then he can file for contempt. If he doesnt bring the child back to your home, regardless if you are there or not, then he will be in contempt. What does the child want to do? If the child wants to stay with his dad, then just by reading your post, it seems to me that you guys are reasonable to each other. If that is so, then I would suggest you 2 get together and ask the child. BUT DONT ARGUE IN FRONT OF THE CHILD!!! Both of you need to assure the child that both of you respect his decision as to where the child is to stay. But if you two cannot come to an agreement, then by law you both have to follow the order.

I must respectfully disagree with that advice. The custody doesn't vest in the PLACE but in the person. If they took it to court a judge might rule either way...a judge might rule that the child remains with dad while mom is away, or that the current placement continue because of the siblings. However if dad simply "kept" the child its unlikely that a judge would punish dad for that...because mom wasn't there.