Just A Question

[Peanuts200788]

What is the name of your state? GA

I've read several posts where people would say something like 'my child was at my X's house and something happened (ex. breaking a bone, injesting a bottle of cough syrup, etc.) while he/she was in his/her care.

IF something like this happened what would you do? Would you report it right away, and if so who would you report it to?

I am just curious...I am discovering I have a lot of questions, not necessarily for myself just in general.

 

[Isis1]

for me...it all depends. what did the child say (if he/she were old enough)? children have accidents, and sometimes get into things out of nowhere. no parent is picture perfect. what really matters is what was/or is being done to rectify the accident. such as taken to the emergency (calling 911 is more efficient) and what precautions are being done to prevent the accident again?

but that's just my opinion as a custodial parent.

 

[Peanuts200788]

ok, I'll use a family member for an example...

he has two kids...he was seperated from his wife and while they were in her care, his youngest son broke his arm because she was sick and unable to watch the child as closely as she should have...

so what would a parent do in this situation?

like i said these questions are just in general...I find I like learning new things.

 

[jbowman]

Honestly, accidents happen. It is merely an opinion that the broken arm happened because the child wasnt supervised. Jeese, my son has had a broken arm, bruised ribs, all kinds of stuff. If the NCP tried to say it was from my neglect, there would be hell to pay.

Now if you suspect ABUSE, in my opinion, that is a whole different story. If my child came home from the other parents house with bruise, welts etc, I would immediately take him to the ER to have it documented and checked out. That is to protect my child as well as myself. If my child was abused and I did nothing, I would be in just as much trouble.

 

[TinkerBelleLuvr]

Don't borrow trouble. I believe it'll be a while before you have to worry about some of these items. Work with an experienced mom to make sure you have a safe place for your baby.

 

[CJane]

Ya know, one thing you'll learn VERY quickly as a new mom is that stuff happens.

They're going to fall down, bump their heads, walk into walls, fall down stairs, get bit by dogs, fall off bikes, fall out of trees, hit their thumbs with hammers, step on shards of glass, cut themselves w/knives, drink cough syrup, eat your makeup, eat crayons, burn themselves, fall off the top bunk, get scratched by the cat, develop allergies, throw up, cough, get snotty noses, tear their clothes, lose their shoes, draw on themselves... I can't even list everything.

If you (and by that I mean anyone) start trying to assign blame or fault to things like that, you'll not only go mad, you'll drive everyone else around you crazy as well.

Trust me. I wanted everything that went wrong at my ex's house to be HIS fault too... and then I got sane.

Just be the best parent you can be when your child is with you. Take responsibility for YOUR actions/decisions and hope that the other parent will too.

 

[Peanuts200788]

Curiosity Is All

you're right Ginny, I had just read several posts where parents had said something about their children getting into things bc they werent supervised at whichever parent's home they were at, and later they were asked by someone on here did they document it or report it right away if they had these suspicions and my question was who would you report it to?

Like I said, just a question to satisfy curiosity, not really applying to me, just curious

 

[CJane]

ok, I'll use a family member for an example...

he has two kids...he was seperated from his wife and while they were in her care, his youngest son broke his arm because she was sick and unable to watch the child as closely as she should have...

so what would a parent do in this situation?

like i said these questions are just in general...I find I like learning new things.

Like someone else said, that's an opinion. Granted, it may have been because Mom wasn't supervising closely... but that's not neglect.

My kid got her pinky finger broken at daycare. She was screwing around with another kid and he kicked her, hit her finger just right and it was broken. It was no one's FAULT.

Gawd, I'm 34 and I broke my thumb this summer being stupid and competing in a mock Survivor game. It was no one's FAULT and my kids were participating in the same game and could have broken themselves.

 

[Peanuts200788]

Thank You

well thank you all...you've answered my question! Much appreciated...

I'm finding that since being in this forum I find myself addicted, I like reading others' stories and cases and learning...this is a very interesting field

 

[LdiJ]

Ya know, one thing you'll learn VERY quickly as a new mom is that stuff happens.

They're going to fall down, bump their heads, walk into walls, fall down stairs, get bit by dogs, fall off bikes, fall out of trees, hit their thumbs with hammers, step on shards of glass, cut themselves w/knives, drink cough syrup, eat your makeup, eat crayons, burn themselves, fall off the top bunk, get scratched by the cat, develop allergies, throw up, cough, get snotty noses, tear their clothes, lose their shoes, draw on themselves... I can't even list everything.

If you (and by that I mean anyone) start trying to assign blame or fault to things like that, you'll not only go mad, you'll drive everyone else around you crazy as well.

Trust me. I wanted everything that went wrong at my ex's house to be HIS fault too... and then I got sane.

Just be the best parent you can be when your child is with you. Take responsibility for YOUR actions/decisions and hope that the other parent will too.

Incredibly well said Cjane.

 

[Ohiogal]

Peanut keep learning. On your other thread, you said I made you mad. I want to comment on that -- GOOD! If I made you mad and you are still here, that means you are getting prepared. Court is never pretty. Raising a child with an ex is seldom easy. Its hard. VERY HARD at times. But you need to do it. You need to get court orders. You need to deal with your ex. If you get mad and then learn from that, you will be further ahead than someone who is on a constant pity party and full of woe.

 

[Peanuts200788]

To: OG

Well... I have learned a lot in these forums and I have obtained a lot of useful information as well.

OG, thank you for making me mad because it made me want to find out all I could about this subject and I have.

You have made me realize what it is that I need to be doing to get myself in order, and ready for this baby.

I've researched on the Internet, called my local Medicaid office and DFCS office and they have answered a lot of my questions.

 

[CJane]

I've researched on the Internet, called my local Medicaid office and DFCS office and they have answered a lot of my questions.

Book mark everything of interest. Keep reading. Learn how to read statutes for your state as they pertain to family law. If you know anyone who's divorced, read THEIR custody order or parenting plan so you know what to expect.

It's not your state, but look up the Indiana parenting time guidelines for infants and read those.

Google Parenting Plan + information for ideas on what should be included.

Keep yourself educated and informed so you CAN deal with stuff that WILL happen.

 

[Peanuts200788]

I will def. do that, and I have another question which may make me sound dumb but it's one of those hindsight is 20-20 situations...

I called the DEFCS office earlier, told them what I had heard about having a baby and if you refuse to divulge who the father is your Medicaid would be revoked, and asked them if they knew anything about this.

I was told that no my pregnancy Medicaid would not be affected, but if I went to apply for Medicaid later that I would be denied if I refused to give up this information.

It did not occur to me then to ask was the baby included in this, so that is question, and yes I know it is stupid, and I was embarassed to call back up there and ask them to clarify. :

 

[CJane]

It did not occur to me then to ask was the baby included in this, so that is question, and yes I know it is stupid, and I was embarassed to call back up there and ask them to clarify. :

I think this is a state by state issue.

In MY state, if you apply for medicaid for the child AFTER THE CHILD'S FIRST BIRTHDAY (because if you don't have insurance, the child is automatically covered for 12 months), they will require that you divulge the name of the father. For medicaid, they will NOT go after him for CS, but if there is already an order, they will amend the order to include him paying for insurance. But you're required to give the info regardless.