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Ky custody question

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What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? KY

My best friend since high school is in a situation and I'm looking for answers for her since she works 2 full time jobs. She also resides in KY.

She mistakenly thought she had been common law married for about 19 years. Her 'husband' told her after a year of living together and her using his last name and telling people they were married (they went to get married but didn't due to family emergency and the ppl back home just assumed they had married while gone) that the law saw them as common law married. He's law enforcement so she believed him until calling me last week to see what I knew about common law divorce.

He has become verbally abusive in the past year or 2 and is also throwing things in his rage. He has started treating their 3 children (he signed the birth certificates) the same way and she wants to take the kids and move out of the home but in the same city. He states she can not take the kids.

She terrified and confused because well, he's uncle is the sheriff and his family is high powered. So she's afraid to contact any one legally because she's afraid it'd get back to him.

The question is can she take the kids when she does leave? Or does he have the right to stop her from taking the children or come demand them back because they have all been residing in the same household for all these years?

Thanks.
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
kentucky does not recognize common law marriages.So as such she is the sole custodian of the children HOWEVER she may have other issues such as whether or not she fraudulently filed as married on income taxes and what issues her using an alias may have given her. He can file for custody of the children and to establish paternity and what not. If she does leave she needs to take the children with her.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Common-law marriage (or common law marriage), sometimes called de facto marriage, informal marriage or marriage by habit and repute, is a form of interpersonal status which is legally recognized in some jurisdictions as a marriage even though no legally recognized marriage ceremony is performed or civil marriage contract is entered into. A common law marriage is legally binding in some jurisdictions but has no meaning in others. In some jurisdictions without true common law marriages (e.g. Hungary), the term "common law marriage" is used as a synonym for non-marital relationships such as domestic partnership or reciprocal beneficiaries relationship.

Common-law marriage can still be contracted in eleven states (Alabama, Colorado, Iowa, Kansas, Montana, New Hampshire (posthumously), Oklahoma, Rhode Island, South Carolina, Texas, and Utah) and in the District of Columbia.
Kentucky is NOT listed here.

Common-law marriages can no longer be contracted in the following states, as of the dates given: Alaska (1917), Arizona (1913), California (1895), Florida (1968), Georgia (1997), Hawaii (1920), Idaho (1996), Illinois (1905), Indiana (1958), Kentucky (1852), Maine (1652, when it became part of Massachusetts; then a state, 1820), Massachusetts (1646), Michigan (1957), Minnesota (1941), Mississippi (1956), Missouri (1921), Nebraska (1923), Nevada (1943), New Mexico (1860), New York (1933, also 1902–1908), New Jersey (1939), North Dakota (1890), Ohio (1991), Pennsylvania (2005), South Dakota (1959), and Wisconsin (1917).
Don't think they are that old, right?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Common-law_marriage#United_States

Basically, they are shacking up.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
kentucky does not recognize common law marriages.So as such she is the sole custodian of the children HOWEVER she may have other issues such as whether or not she fraudulently filed as married on income taxes and what issues her using an alias may have given her. He can file for custody of the children and to establish paternity and what not. If she does leave she needs to take the children with her.

If she filed fraudulent income tax returns, so did he. However I agree she may have other issues if she has been using his name in other areas where her legal name should be used.

If she is in a very small town, it could be problematic that his whole family is in law enforcement. I would strongly recommend that she get an attorney that is NOT in that specific community. It will help.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
If she filed fraudulent income tax returns, so did he. However I agree she may have other issues if she has been using his name in other, legal ways.

If she is in a very small town, it could be problematic that his whole family is in law enforcement. I would strongly recommend that she get an attorney that is NOT in that specific community. It will help.

I understand he would as well. But I was answering about her specifically. There are many issues involved here that she needs an attorney to help her straighten.
 
Sorry, I didn't state it sooner but she knows KY doesn't recognize common law marriage. She learned that when I told her so last week.

OHIOGAL - Yes, I told her about the tax issue and that she needed to look into that and be doing whatever she has to do to make it right.

As for the alias, back in 89 when she went into the driver's license's department and told them she was getting married the next week and wanted to change her name. They allowed it.

She then went to the Social Security Department and she told them she was getting married the next week and wanted to change her card. They asked for any documentation with her new name and she handed them the driver's license. She was issued a new card with the name from the driver's license.

I know I used the same place for my driver's license back then and I changed my name on mine after I married and they never asked for any documentation. I remember because I had bought along my marriage license and newly acquired military i.d. and thought how odd they refused to even look at either when I offered them to them.

It's a whole other issue for her as she wants her birth name back. And I have no idea how to even approach that one. Told her to wait as other issues where more important now.

Thanks for the responses. As I thought what Ohiogal posted but couldn't find it when I was searching. I know I was just wording it wrong.
 
And yes, I told her to call too. His family be d@mned. If nothing else find the direct state line and tell them to send state cops as he's former city cop and now a deputy.

And yes, I told her to go out of the area for an attorney. She's still kind of shocked she's not common law married, but I told her no time for shock get your rear in gear and fix it.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
She's always worked and has worked 2 full time jobs for the last few years.
She can always take the tax returns that were done to a tax service and see what the ramification is for them amending the returns. I would go back 3 years.
 
Thanks Ginny.

Actually they have always used a tax service to do their taxes. Small town so always same one. So she has them and the service has so many of them to, I guess. And I told her I thought she could file to amend on some past ones.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
She's always worked and has worked 2 full time jobs for the last few years.

I am a tax professional and I am going to advise that she leave the tax situation alone. She should not file any further joint returns with him, but it would be wiser to let sleeping dogs lie regarding prior years. Filing together means that it was unlikely that they qualified for any EIC or anything like that, so any overall changes in their combined tax would likely not be signficant if they are in favor of the IRS. In fact, if he was a police officer and now is a deputy, I guarantee they didn't qualify for EIC. They most likely paid more tax than they would have paid if they had not filed together....because they wouldn't have been subject to the "married filing separately" rules.

Also, because the rules don't allow a joint return to be separated into separate returns after the 15th of April of the year it was due, it would actually be a very big and complicated mess to change anything now.

Since her social security card has his last name, that IS her legal last name, so she has no issues to deal with there. Although she will have to go to court to legally take back her birth name.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
She might not want them to be reviewed in this small town, KWIM? Might want to look towards bigger town. She can always mail them to another service.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
She might not want them to be reviewed in this small town, KWIM? Might want to look towards bigger town. She can always mail them to another service.

I have actually separated returns in a similar situation. It was a very huge mess and it was necessary to fight the IRS hard to get the returns separated. It took almost two years of fighting with them.

Its very easy to amend returns to change them to joint, its a huge fight to change them to two single returns. The IRS demands that you prove that you weren't married, and that's nearly impossible to do. Its nearly impossible to prove a negative.
 

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