Little cousin in mental hospital..

[footballfan]

What is the name of your state?Oklahoma

There is way too much to this story to tell the entire thing so I will give highlights...

mom and dad were never married...had 4 boys...split...mom got into drugs and prositution...dad walked away...he showed up every now and then but no regular contact... Kids moved in with grandma she had legal gaurdianship given to her by mom...
Dad got married came back in the pictured..filed for custody and won..
The g-ma got visits once every four weeks...
Dad and grandma can be civil but SM and grandma have personalilty conflicts...lol to say the least....CPS has been to the house in the last two weeks because the youngest one was denied a visit with grandma when told why by the older boys they said he got spanked and was grounded...so when g-ma dropped them off on Sunday she went in to see youngest boy..he had bruises all over..so g-ma called cops and CPS....so SM called g-ma up and of course shared some words...well that was the last g-ma heard of what was going on....till today.... Bio mom called and said dad called her and that youngest child is trying to break up him and new wife and poked his younger step brother in the eye...so get this child has been put in for 30 days thats a LONG time for someone so young inless something is wrong with him..right???

So question is, is this normal??? For him to be in there soooo long...does that mean during the evaluation the DR. found something wrong?? What are g-ma rights?? Can she see him while in there? What can mom do to get access to find out whats really going on...

By this way child is only 8 years old and lived with grandmas for 5 years of his life then just ripped out so yeah he's gonna have problems..

 

[king sol]

And...........how serious was the poke?

A poke to the eye, regardless of the offender's age, is cause for concern....or at least question.

Eight can be a very "trying" age for both the child and the parents...as well as siblings.

Don't panic, until there is a reason to panic. A litlle "away time" and evaluation, would probably do us all some good.

 

[footballfan]

And...........how serious was the poke?

A poke to the eye, regardless of the offender's age, is cause for concern....or at least question.

Eight can be a very "trying" age for both the child and the parents...as well as siblings.

Don't panic, until there is a reason to panic. A litlle "away time" and evaluation, would probably do us all some good.

I completely disagree...a poke in the eye is not that serious...as kids do that..does it need to be handled? Yes.. but put in a hospital..

And as for it being a trying age..I have a son a month younger than this child...and yes he tries me...his dad..his teachers..but NO WAY is THAT a reason to lock him down either..

And a little away time fofr an eight year old can do damage too..I don't think they understand the away time....I can't imagine my ds being taken away for 30 days or me sending him away for 30 days....I had trouble doing a week at church camp with my child.....and he was enjoying himself....

And going with that "away" time theory send him to grandmas if you need a break..Thats what most parents would do..not too many lock their kids up..for away time... At least none I know..

 

[king sol]

footballfan: I completely disagree...a poke in the eye is not that serious...See next post......full of info on eye injuries

fan: And as for it being a trying age..reason to lock him down...not too many lock their kids...Locking him down? Do you equate seeking medical attention with being prisoned? or shackled?

fan: I have a son a month younger than this child...and yes he tries me...so, you do agree...children can have difficulties at this age! Comparing the two boys? Has your son been "ripped away" from Mom, then Gma and now Dad? Or has he been beaten and bruised? A little common sense...all children not the same!!

fan: me sending him away for 30 days....I had trouble doing a week at church camp..... It is your responsibility as a parent, to do what is in the best interest of your child. A parent who would "have trouble" with their child being in the hospital for a month...may be the next to hear CPS' knock.

fan: And going with that "away" time theory send him to grandmas if you need a break..Time with Gma? Gma seems to be adding to the disharmony. If Gma is so concerned about the welfare of her family...perhaps, she should start at the source of all this boys problems....Gma's daughter (I assume). Gma didn't fair to well with her own child, let Dad raise his. Who interpreted this decision as "Dad needing a break" anyway?

fan: What are g-ma rights?? ...can mom.. find out whats really going on...Gma rights??? This is about the child, not Gma. And now you are suggesting Mom get involved..."the drug addicted prostitute"?

fan: child is only 8... lived with grandmas for 5 years... then just ripped out so yeah he's gonna have problems.. Ripped? From a Dad he hasn't lived with for 8 years? Or like he was ripped from Mom after three years?

Hey fan- Who are you anyway? Not close enough to know the details or witness the beatings? Heresay..BioMom, the drugged up hooker, calls Gma (who seems to be looking for trouble, sense she lost custody). Gma told you (???) that Dad, (who, according to you, split, beats his child and locks him away to get a "break"...told "absent" Bio Mom (in between tricks?) that his son intentionally poked a sibling's eye (causing enough concern to admit him to a mental hospital) in hopes of tearing apart his Dad's marriage.

By your own admission, this boy has had "advocates" on his behalf..."Cops", "CPS", "Dr." and the mental hospital. Not to mention the concern of YOU , Gma, BioMom, Big Bros, Dad and possibly the new wife.

Dad is back in the picture, tell BioMom and Gma to support his efforts...for the child's best interest. Obviously, Dad is doing something right...he is married and trying to raise his family. The court must have seen something more that you, Gma and "the birth mother" as has the "authorities" and mental health community.

In closing....(in my opinion) the quote you choose, speaks volumes for your intellect!

 

[king sol]

http://www.babycenter.com/refcap/toddler/toddlerills/todeyes/11248.html
What should I do if my child's eye has been poked or scratched?
If there's a chance the cornea has been scratched (that is, if the eye is red, inflamed, watering excessively, or draining mucus), you'll have to go to the emergency room. It's extremely important that no one touch the eye in the meantime. If any part of the eye is torn, rubbing can cause vitreous fluid, the colorless jelly that fills the eyeball, to leak out, which can cause permanent damage. A scratched cornea will usually heal within a few days, but your child's doctor will want to check the eye first to make sure it hasn't been seriously damaged. He'll probably also prescribe antibiotic eye drops to prevent infection.

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http://www.sports-health.org/HTML/injuries/eye.htm
Eye Injuries
Bob Collins, ATC
Injuries to the eyes can occur in any sport. The possibility of losing partial or total sight can occur when there is an injury to the eye region. Whether the injury comes from a thrown object, finger poke, or a speck of dirt it is essential to treat any injury to the eye or eye area as significant.
Evaluating an acute injury:
Inspect around the eye for swelling, discoloration, deformities and eyelid movement
Palpate for tenderness and bony deformities around the eye socket
Inspect the entire eye and mucous lining for foreign bodies, blood or other deformities
Check pupils (they should be equal in size, get smaller when exposed to light, larger when exposed to dark)
Determine vision clearness by having the athlete look at an object with the unaffected eye covered. The athlete may complain of blurry vision, seeing double, floating black specks, or flashing light. This may indicated a serious eye injury.

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http://www.rogershospital.org/child_adolescent_services.php#inpatient
Child & Adolescent Services
The Child & Adolescent Services of Rogers Memorial Hospital provides a safe and supportive environment for children and adolescents 4 to 18 years of age. Our experienced staff is concerned about the needs of each individual and will develop a treatment plan that is personalized for each child.

In addition to individual and group therapy, Rogers Memorial offers interactive therapy, including art, music, and drama, to involve the child in the treatment process.
Our therapeutic play yard and Ropes & Challenge Course provide cooperative group skills. Our Oconomowoc campus also offers Challenge Camp, a day camp for children with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder during summer.

We recognize that communication is an important element of treatment. Staff will work with the family, caregiver, school, community support agency and outpatient treatment provider to encourage a smooth transition upon completion of the program.

The Child & Adolescent Services offers three levels of care:
Child & Adolescent Center
The Child & Adolescent Center provides boys and girls age 12 to 17 with a longer term (30-45 days) intensive care program of intervention and treatment to address child and adolescent psychiatric disorders, including ADHD, depression, anxiety disorder, chemical dependency and family issues. The program is designed with the intensity of inpatient treatment and the flexibility and features of a residential program.
Inpatient Program
The child and adolescent inpatient program provides intensive, short-term care for crisis intervention and stabilization for a variety of psychiatric symptoms and diagnoses. The primary focus is on assessment, initial stabilization, and a transition into day treatment or outpatient therapy. An approximate length of stay is 7 to 10 days.

Day Treatment Program
The child and adolescent day treatment program provides a supplement to outpatient therapy, a transition from inpatient care, or an alternative to inpatient treatment. This half-day structured program allows patients to continue involvement with their family and school. An average length of stay is 90 days. The cost is covered by Medicaid and most insurance companies.

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http://www.findarticles.com/p/articles/mi_qa4100/is_200310/ai_n9333108

GOOD LUCK!!​

 

[casa]

What is the name of your state?Oklahoma

There is way too much to this story to tell the entire thing so I will give highlights...

mom and dad were never married...had 4 boys...split...mom got into drugs and prositution...dad walked away...he showed up every now and then but no regular contact... Kids moved in with grandma she had legal gaurdianship given to her by mom...
Dad got married came back in the pictured..filed for custody and won..
The g-ma got visits once every four weeks...
Dad and grandma can be civil but SM and grandma have personalilty conflicts...lol to say the least....CPS has been to the house in the last two weeks because the youngest one was denied a visit with grandma when told why by the older boys they said he got spanked and was grounded...so when g-ma dropped them off on Sunday she went in to see youngest boy..he had bruises all over..so g-ma called cops and CPS....so SM called g-ma up and of course shared some words...well that was the last g-ma heard of what was going on....till today.... Bio mom called and said dad called her and that youngest child is trying to break up him and new wife and poked his younger step brother in the eye...so get this child has been put in for 30 days thats a LONG time for someone so young inless something is wrong with him..right???

So question is, is this normal??? For him to be in there soooo long...does that mean during the evaluation the DR. found something wrong?? What are g-ma rights?? Can she see him while in there? What can mom do to get access to find out whats really going on...

By this way child is only 8 years old and lived with grandmas for 5 years of his life then just ripped out so yeah he's gonna have problems..

Inpatient care for children in troubled families can be a very positive experience. The child receives focused counseling and can be evaluated &/or diagnosed...events of abuse likely come out during this process. The child has many professionals and advocates, who create a comprehensive treatment plan for both in and out of the hospital. The child will likely be set up with continued counseling and parenting agreements with whomever the child will be living with. The information and treatment obtained during this stay will also be vital in the event a future court case ensues. This is a blessing in disquise for this child- Whether he was abused and needs advocacy, or whether he needs diagnosis/treatment for any behavioral disorder.

 

[footballfan]

Inpatient care for children in troubled families can be a very positive experience. The child receives focused counseling and can be evaluated &/or diagnosed...events of abuse likely come out during this process. The child has many professionals and advocates, who create a comprehensive treatment plan for both in and out of the hospital. The child will likely be set up with continued counseling and parenting agreements with whomever the child will be living with. The information and treatment obtained during this stay will also be vital in the event a future court case ensues. This is a blessing in disquise for this child- Whether he was abused and needs advocacy, or whether he needs diagnosis/treatment for any behavioral disorder.

Thank you Casa..as that is all I was asking for..I have no experiance with children being placed in mental hospitals and was courius if this was normal from what I was told which is what I told here...
And for others to posted... I realize an eye injury can be very harmful..but again it was an 8 year old and I am not sure how it really happend...
I guess it would be natural for some of you to reply the way you did...honestly to insult my intellect though was a bit over board..IMO..
I love this child and have seen all that he has gone through...PURE HELL....I didn't say he didnt need help I just questioned if 30 days away was the answer..I have never been in a mental hospital..so I can't say he's been "locked down" but I can say being anywhere away from the family that you have loved and raised you would be tramatic in it's self...
I have since came to the realization that this might not be soo bad for him in the long run...maybe they will see the problems and he will get help he needs..I just thought there was steps to take before it got to this point..
And yes what are grandams rights...she is the only stability this child has known in his short life.. and as for getting mom involved since g-ma has no rights and dad aint sharing...mom does have the right to know where her child is...it is the LAW...regardless of what her problems are...really the questoin was just "IS THIS NORMAL?" Thats all I really asked...wasn't looking to be judged cuzz I think dads an a$$ too....and getting married doesn't make him a good daddy..maybe next time he calls drunk at 2 in the morning I'll ask where he gets his great fathering tips from....
So again thanks.

 

[casa]

Thank you Casa..as that is all I was asking for..I have no experiance with children being placed in mental hospitals and was courius if this was normal from what I was told which is what I told here...
And for others to posted... I realize an eye injury can be very harmful..but again it was an 8 year old and I am not sure how it really happend...
I guess it would be natural for some of you to reply the way you did...honestly to insult my intellect though was a bit over board..IMO..
I love this child and have seen all that he has gone through...PURE HELL....I didn't say he didnt need help I just questioned if 30 days away was the answer..I have never been in a mental hospital..so I can't say he's been "locked down" but I can say being anywhere away from the family that you have loved and raised you would be tramatic in it's self...
I have since came to the realization that this might not be soo bad for him in the long run...maybe they will see the problems and he will get help he needs..I just thought there was steps to take before it got to this point..
And yes what are grandams rights...she is the only stability this child has known in his short life.. and as for getting mom involved since g-ma has no rights and dad aint sharing...mom does have the right to know where her child is...it is the LAW...regardless of what her problems are...really the questoin was just "IS THIS NORMAL?" Thats all I really asked...wasn't looking to be judged cuzz I think dads an a$$ too....and getting married doesn't make him a good daddy..maybe next time he calls drunk at 2 in the morning I'll ask where he gets his great fathering tips from....
So again thanks.

I used to work on an inpatient children's unit- and yes, it's normal. In fact, it's unfortunate more people don't have insurance to cover inpatient programs. The child will get a lot of support and a solid treatment plan for his release- the problem lies in whether or not any of the parents will adhere to it. The grandmother has no rights unless she petitions the court and receives visitation rights, since father was given custody by the courts.

 

[stealth2]

I completely disagree...a poke in the eye is not that serious...as kids do that...

I won't comment on the rest as I think casa did a good job, but I do have to address the above. As someone who is now blind in one eye (unless I opt for a corneal transplant) from a "poke" - it can be extremely serious.

 

[footballfan]

I used to work on an inpatient children's unit- and yes, it's normal. In fact, it's unfortunate more people don't have insurance to cover inpatient programs. The child will get a lot of support and a solid treatment plan for his release- the problem lies in whether or not any of the parents will adhere to it. The grandmother has no rights unless she petitions the court and receives visitation rights, since father was given custody by the courts.

OK now she has been granted visitation rights..it's once every four weeks for the week end...so if the time falls on her time can she visit too? Thats if he is being allowed visitors..I've heard that sometimes the DR. doesn't allow visitors at all...and when would this come into play....I'm not saying that this is what happened..dad really isn't sharing anything other than they took him to hospital...
Thanks again....and I guess it sounded as if I thought the eye wasn't serious..I'm sorry I know it can be....but from what I understood this wasn't a serious injury....no medical treatment was taken... but again thanks...

 

[CJane]

OK now she has been granted visitation rights..it's once every four weeks for the week end...so if the time falls on her time can she visit too? Thats if he is being allowed visitors..I've heard that sometimes the DR. doesn't allow visitors at all...and when would this come into play....I'm not saying that this is what happened..dad really isn't sharing anything other than they took him to hospital...

The mother's best bet, if the father is withholding information, is to call the hospital and identify herself as this boy's mother, and see if she can get any information from his physician. If that fails, contacting an attorney would be my second step, if I were in her shoes.