long distance parenting plan?

[Ohiogal]

Last night I got an email stating that with the child support order would be an order for visitation. Correct me if I am wrong but there are several things wrong with this;

1) I am not subject to the jurisdiction of WY courts in the matter of custody and visitation due to not being a resident for the last 18 months
2) since there was not a stipulation or addition to the original support issue, he would have to bring a separate motion at a different time.
anything I missed?

Another issue though, since he is not a resident of MN, would he HAVE to hire an atty here in order to bring any M&O addressing custody and visitation?

He could file pro se in the MN courts. What orders do exist? Just support?

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

He could file pro se in the MN courts. What orders do exist? Just support?

The only orders that exist are the support orders which only reference custody offhandedly when naming the parent with whom he lives. There isn't anything else that exists regarding this. He signed the ROP in WY at the hospital, but there has not been a separate adjudication of parentage in court to my knowledge, I would have had to be served, correct?

 

[Ohiogal]

The only orders that exist are the support orders which only reference custody offhandedly when naming the parent with whom he lives. There isn't anything else that exists regarding this. He signed the ROP in WY at the hospital, but there has not been a separate adjudication of parentage in court to my knowledge, I would have had to be served, correct?

The court determined parentage with the child support order. They had to determine and adjudicate paternity. Did he file a custody modification? Because technically, depending on exact wording, custody remains in the state you moved from if dad still lives there as a determination of custody was made then.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

The court determined parentage with the child support order. They had to determine and adjudicate paternity. Did he file a custody modification? Because technically, depending on exact wording, custody remains in the state you moved from if dad still lives there as a determination of custody was made then.

Nope nothing to do with custody. No inclusion of custody wording, no separate order. Just the support.

 

[Ohiogal]

Nope nothing to do with custody. No inclusion of custody wording, no separate order. Just the support.

That is contradicting what you stated earlier --

The only orders that exist are the support orders which only reference custody offhandedly when naming the parent with whom he lives.

That is a determination of custody.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

That is contradicting what you stated earlier --


That is a determination of custody.

Going back to the original order: "Stipulation to Establish Support and Judgment of Arrears"
3. " Custody and Duty of Support: (states my name) has physical custody of the parties' minor child. There exists an obligation for the respondent (states his name), to contribute to the current and future support and maintenance of above said child. "

does that change anything?

 

[Ohiogal]

Going back to the original order: "Stipulation to Establish Support and Judgment of Arrears"
3. " Custody and Duty of Support: (states my name) has physical custody of the parties' minor child. There exists an obligation for the respondent (states his name), to contribute to the current and future support and maintenance of above said child. "

does that change anything?

Custody was determined with that order. Hence that state has jurisdiction over modifications to custody.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

Custody was determined with that order. Hence that state has jurisdiction over modifications to custody.

OG, being that I have not been a resident of WY for over 18 months and have no intention of moving back, would it be prudent to file a countersuit here in MN when I receive my (assuming it ever happens) summons (or whatever it'll be) from WY? Would I be correct in stating that if I file a response to his claim that I would be subjecting myself to the jurisdiction of the WY court?

 

[Ohiogal]

OG, being that I have not been a resident of WY for over 18 months and have no intention of moving back, would it be prudent to file a countersuit here in MN when I receive my (assuming it ever happens) summons (or whatever it'll be) from WY? Would I be correct in stating that if I file a response to his claim that I would be subjecting myself to the jurisdiction of the WY court?

YOu cannot file a countersuit in MN to a WY case. If you file a response without disputing jurisdiction then you would be subjecting yourself to the jurisdiction of the WY court. However the WY court may -- and probably does -- have jurisdiction based on the fact that dad still lives there and they made an initial determination of custody.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

YOu cannot file a countersuit in MN to a WY case. If you file a response without disputing jurisdiction then you would be subjecting yourself to the jurisdiction of the WY court. However the WY court may -- and probably does -- have jurisdiction based on the fact that dad still lives there and they made an initial determination of custody.

Could I then petition for a change of jurisdiction?

 

[Ohiogal]

Could I then petition for a change of jurisdiction?

You could but they could deny it. What you need to do is consult with an attorney in MN and one in WY.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

OG, sorry its been so long in responding... had to find the thread!

Thanks for all of your advice, things keep getting more interesting as the days progress. First the 'threat' of visitation schedule, now I haven't heard anything from him in weeks. Its kind of funny how things are working, when I don't do what he asks me to, there are all kinds of things he 'threatens' to do, when I've done what he asks, there is no contact. ie, reporting my income directly to the court and company who run the county's child support agency, he now has not contacted me, although things that I've asked him to do remain unaccomplished as well.

*sigh* he doesn't know what he is missing in the time that he hasn't attempted to see our son. I won't even try to force him to exercise his parental rights, that wouldn't be fair to our child. Thanks to all who have responded.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

Now What?

Since my last posting, there has been no contact with my son's father. None. No letters, no calls and his phone and internet has apparently been disconnected.
Yesterday, my mom brought my son home from daycare and when I pulled into the driveway (I don't get home until after they do), my mom asked who was at the house. (its a game we play, learning to differentiate between sounds of vehicles). He said, Uncle! my mom said no, who else could it be... he said Daddy! then it was onto me....

My question does not necessarily need a legal answer, as I don't believe that there is one, but rather personal experience. What now? How do I explain to a child who hasn't seen his father since he was 5 months old who daddy is? How do I get past the gut wrenching reaction when he says it? I know that he's picked up the term from daycare and from my nieces, but does anyone know and wants to relate their story on how they've dealt with the broken home and absent parent?

Thanks in advance!

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

Its been six months, not really a legal question

Its been six months (give or take a couple of days) since the last time I heard from my son's father. Although I know it sounds bad, its a relief because the only time we communicate is him threatening me with custody, visitation etc (not that the visitation would be a bad thing) and me asking him to not talk to me the way he does.

I've been on this forum for about the same amount of time and have learned a lot. But with the holidays upon us, how do I encourage and facilitate a relationship with my son and his father when there is none? Earlier this year I had been sending monthly updates and fell behind with my work schedule being what it is. I haven't sent a monthly update since April. I'm not proud of the fact that we can't seem to co-parent, he hasn't ever asked to see his son, just says that 'at some point there will be a visitation order set up and it will be a meet in the middle for the exchange for the summer and maybe Christmas. He is my son and you will not keep him from me.' As if I could should he decide to come and see him.

Thoughts would be nice. I am really struggling with the fact that all of our communications are threats coming from him and his girlfriend (can tell by the syntax of the sentences who its from). I do not want to keep him from our son, I don't believe that I have. However, am I supposed to just offer for him to come here for Christmas? I know he won't, he won't spend the money and he won't come alone. I will not allow his girlfriend in my house, and since he hasn't seen his father since he was 5 months old (its been almost 2 years now), I do not feel comfortable just giving our son over to him for any length of time without supervision. I am open to him coming here (alone) and spending some time with our child but want to avoid all of the drama that is associated with our communications.
Help?

 

[Ohiogal]

Don't dictate that he come alone. Facilitate does NOT necessarily mean invite him to stay with you. You can send dad a Christmas card from his child. Let the child doodle in it. Send him pictures of his child. Ask him to send pics of him (and even his girlfriend) so that your child can see him.