Marriage/Parental Neglect

[Sabbykins]

What is the name of your state? Tennessee

I'm asking this for my father-in-law and sister-in-law. My sister in law, who is 16 (17 on May 1st) Has been seeing a 26 year old, with parental consent, for a year and a half. DCS caught wind of it, and have mailed a letter to my father in law threatening charges of neglect.

Father in Law and Mother in Law have agreed to sign for them to get married.

Will it still be considered neglect if they are married, due to the four year statutory rape laws in TN, or will the marriage nullify that since it is legal? Can my father in law still get in trouble for letting them see each other prior to the marriage, after the fact?

Thanks for your help!

 

[Wolflmg]

What kind of parent allows their 16 year old to date a 26 year old?

I don't know what is wrong with your father in law, but I think something should be done about this. It seems to me he's looking for an easy way out, agreeing for his kid to get married at a young age. Which will probably somewhere down the line only end up with her getting hurt badly.

I would be willing to bet DCS will do whatever is in their power to make sure things go the way they should.

 

[Sabbykins]

My father in law is, honestly, at the end of his rope. If he didn't consent, Matt and Susie would run away out of state, or Susie would get pregnant...NEITHER option being very good for her life, and NEITHER option could be avoided. Susie is just like me at that age; she will do whatever it takes to get what she wants regardless of who she hurts. She'll have to learn from experience, just like I did. You can't talk her out of anything. (I was in fact imancipated at age 16, moved to Arizona with my boyfriend at the time, and had to learn a hard life lesson that way. I don't regret it a bit, because I know that I never would have listened otherwise.)

Opinions aside, I was asking from a purely legal standpoint. Susie has already dropped out of school twice (this last time, however, *I* paid for her schooling through Thompson so she would at the very least get a diploma instead of a GED, and *I* have home schooled her, within a month she is already 1/4 through getting her diploma.)

What kind of parent lets their daughter see a 26 year old man? The kind that cares, to be frank. If you had NO real control over your teen, and knew that she would do something completely stupid, how can a parent NOT allow it? Would you honestly rather it be done behind your back? I know I wouldn't, and neither would most intelligent people. You can harp that the state could step in and take her all you want, you can say there are other options, but they would NOT benefit Susie beyond pissing her off for a little while and hardening her to the system.

Like the old saying goes, opinions are like mouths, everyone has one (well that's not the saying exactly, but you know what I mean.)

So, I'll request that my question be answered from a legal standpoint, not one of opinions, because opinions are just that - your ideals about a situation. And, since given the electronic medium in which we are speaking, the situation cannot be fully assessed and therefore an informed opinion can not be made.

So please, lets keep it legal for now.

 

[Wolflmg]

here's some web sites that may help you out.

http://www.jesbeard.com/6e.htm
http://www.redwoodsgroup.com/ymca-articles-15.asp


But the fact is your not going to find many people on here that would aprove of a parent allowing their 16 year to date someone that is ten years older then them. For one because it is agaisnt the law, and it really is agaisnt the law if that adult is having sex with the minor, that adult can and will go to jail, it's called statutory rape. Which is probably the reason as to why DCS is after your father in-law, they may have reason to believe that the relationship is sexual.

Now whether he concents to her getting married at 16, that the charges would be dropped. I really don't see that happening. DCS may see that as a way for your father-in-law trying to get out of the charges. By useing his daughter to get married at a very young age, they may see it as another way of neglect.

Best thing for your father-in-law would be probably to get a lawyer, or end the relationship between his daughter and this 26 year old. And wait until she is 18 to start this relationship back up with him, when it would be legal for them to be togther.

 

[ENASNI]

aww

Wo

here's some web sites that may help you out.

http://www.jesbeard.com/6e.htm
http://www.redwoodsgroup.com/ymca-articles-15.asp


But the fact is your not going to find many people on here that would aprove of a parent allowing their 16 year to date someone that is ten years older then them. For one because it is agaisnt the law, and it really is agaisnt the law if that adult is having sex with the minor, that adult can and will go to jail, it's called statutory rape. Which is probably the reason as to why DCS is after your father in-law, they may have reason to believe that the relationship is sexual.

Now whether he concents to her getting married at 16, that the charges would be dropped. I really don't see that happening. DCS may see that as a way for your father-in-law trying to get out of the charges. By useing his daughter to get married at a very young age, they may see it as another way of neglect.

Best thing for your father-in-law would be probably to get a lawyer, or end the relationship between his daughter and this 26 year old. And wait until she is 18 to start this relationship back up with him, when it would be legal for them to be togther.

Wolfie... you soo cute.. I wish I could give you a great big hug! That was a nice response... rather than lash out... very mature for your age! (sorry )

A hug As a Mom of course.. I am 16 years older than you... anything else would be SICK!
which is why I am talking to YOU... not the original poster.. even if she was very articulate... and spells better than you...

If my 16 year old... ohhhh.. can't even get it out.. Blood pressure... gotta take a pill.

 

[Wolflmg]

Wo

Wolfie... you soo cute.. I wish I could give you a great big hug! That was a nice response... rather than lash out... very mature for your age! (sorry )

A hug As a Mom of course.. I am 16 years older than you... anything else would be SICK!
which is why I am talking to YOU... not the original poster.. even if she was very articulate... and spells better than you...

If my 16 year old... ohhhh.. can't even get it out.. Blood pressure... gotta take a pill.

Thanks...speaking of pills, I better go and take my blood pressure pills. (Yeah, I know I'm pretty young, but it runs in the family so I just have to make do).

 

[ENASNI]

Yup

Thanks...speaking of pills, I better go and take my blood pressure pills. (Yeah, I know I'm pretty young, but it runs in the family so I just have to make do).

yup... and these kinda posts do not help..

Lets advise they just marry off the whelp... let her get her self in her own trouble and then .. well we see her here in the future.

Just tics me off.. my own girl is sixteen.. looking to a good future.. trouble.. sure... usual stuff.. so I don't know about all this "hard to control stuff" I just know the normal.
I still will not talk to the OP.. this is to you wolfie... but be careful..Kay?
As I am.. hee hee hee.
Hope you are doing okay wolf... check into spellchecking....
I suck at it and look all the time... (and still miss )

 

[Wolflmg]

yup... and these kinda posts do not help..

Lets advise they just marry off the whelp... let her get her self in her own trouble and then .. well we see her here in the future.

Just tics me off.. my own girl is sixteen.. looking to a good future.. trouble.. sure... usual stuff.. so I don't know about all this "hard to control stuff" I just know the normal.
I still will not talk to the OP.. this is to you wolfie... but be careful..Kay?
As I am.. hee hee hee.
Hope you are doing okay wolf... check into spellchecking....
I suck at it and look all the time... (and still miss )

Yeah. Probably would be the only way they, as well as she will learn.

 

[stealth2]

Legally? Pops could be in a world of hurt, whether he consents to a marriage or not.

 

[cmorris]

It is the parent's fault for not having control of their daughter. Why can't your father in law actually be the adult in the situation? He has a say in the relationship, whether he believes it or not. If they run away to another state, the 26 year old can have a boatload of charges brought against him. Let's not forget that the marriage would be void.

If this were my child, there would be no relationship. B/f would be sitting in JAIL. Daughter would be locked in the house under constant adult supervision. While sleeping or in the bathroom, door/window alarms would be a good substitute. And if by chance she still got out, a nice call to the police department might change her mind in the future.

The father-in-law is just a lazy excuse for a parent. He is handing his minor child to an adult to be raped. SICK! And I would venture to guess that even if he allowed the marriage, it doesn't change the past. Charges could still be brought.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Legally? Pops could be in a world of hurt, whether he consents to a marriage or not.

Not according to the Tennessee statutes. There is a clear line in the sand on this issue.

Under Tennessee law, a person must be at least 16 years old before they can get a marriage license, and a marriage license is required for anyone to get married. TCA 36-3-105. For anyone less than 18, both parents or the guardian or next of kin must join in the application for a marriage license. TCA 36-3-106. If either party is less than 18, even if both parents sign the application, there will be a three day waiting period before the marriage license is issued. TCA 36-3-104.

If the parents or guardian or next of kin won't join in applying for a marriage license, the couple can still get a marriage license in Tennessee if the judge of the probate, juvenile, circuit or chancery court, or county executive approves it. TCA 36-3-107. The judge of the probate, juvenile, circuit or chancery court, or county executive can also waive the three day waiting period required for anyone under 18 to get a marriage license.

The only exception to T.C.A 39-13-506, Defining statutory rape in the state of Tennessee, is if the girl is married to her sexual partner. Then it doesn't matter if she is under age, or if the man she is with (her husband) is more than four years older than she is.

And THAT, aside from the emotional claptrap, is the answer to the questions asked.

 

[stealth2]

Hence the use of the word "could", Beebs.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Hence the use of the word "could", Beebs.

I know sweetchecks, I just used your reply because this discussion is sounding more like jerry Falwell than legal advice. it's getting old.

 

[cbg]

Sorry, but legal or not, "She's going to do what she wants anyway so I'll give her permission to do it" just doesn't cut it for me as either a sign of caring or responsibility.

 

[stealth2]

hehehe Is he still alive?