What is the name of your state?FL
Some of you will have seen some of my other posts on this subject, but here is some history. Mom passed away last monday. State is Florida, we had joint legal, with her as the primary residential parent. Mom, daughter (8) and grandmother all lived together for daughter's entire life. Ever since BM was diagnosed as terminal, we have been getting along well. I haven't seen much of my daughter for the last two months, except for frequent short visits, because I wanted her to spend as much time as possible with mom.
Daughter is still in her grandmother's house. I want to make a gradual transition to my home over the next 6 weeks, adding 1 overnight per week. I know that grandma wants custody, but I also hope that we don't begin any kind of fighting for daughter's sake. I want grandma to continue to be an important part of her life.
Also, we live about an hour apart. I would like DD to finish out the year in her current school (4 weeks left). I am willing to do the drive, but grandma works at the school, so it's convenient for her, plus she wants to do it, and I am ok with it as long as we can get along, and there are no legal ramifications.
Questions:
1) I have been told I can just go and get daughter now, but I would like to do this with the transition approach, am I "opening the door" for grandma to go for custody b/c I am allowing her to stay there for these 6 weeks?
2) I am also filing to terminate child support, arrears, and name me as the primary residential parent, the judge wants a death certificate. Is it extremely important for me to get this petition filed (ex-parte, I'd rather grandma was unaware of it, unless it becomes necessary) before grandma tries to file a temporary custody order?
3) Grandma keeps telling me she will get me the cert. soon, but it's been 10 days now, and still no copy of the death certificate. I have checked online, but it is not listed in the county's records, is there any way to get a certified copy of this sooner?
4) DD is in counseling, and the counselor and I are on the same page. I have not explicitly told grandma that DD will be living with me (I am trying to make everything go as smooth as possible, I think it's still too soon for her, she just lost her only daughter). If we make any kind of agreements between gma and I in front of the therapist (such as "Dad has custody of DD, but we want her to continue in school, so gma will provide after school care for DD until the end of the term."). If the therapist' testifies to this, could that be a tool in case she tries to go for custody, and claims that I was willing for her to have custody by letting her stay there?
5) I really feel like there's no good solution for this, any other advice on a course of action that will ensure that a) I have sole custody and b) still keep a good relationship with grandma?
6) if gma were to try to get a temp. custody order, would she have to serve me first, or could she do it ex-parte? (I believe that's the right term)
7) any other suggestions?
Some of you will have seen some of my other posts on this subject, but here is some history. Mom passed away last monday. State is Florida, we had joint legal, with her as the primary residential parent. Mom, daughter (8) and grandmother all lived together for daughter's entire life. Ever since BM was diagnosed as terminal, we have been getting along well. I haven't seen much of my daughter for the last two months, except for frequent short visits, because I wanted her to spend as much time as possible with mom.
Daughter is still in her grandmother's house. I want to make a gradual transition to my home over the next 6 weeks, adding 1 overnight per week. I know that grandma wants custody, but I also hope that we don't begin any kind of fighting for daughter's sake. I want grandma to continue to be an important part of her life.
Also, we live about an hour apart. I would like DD to finish out the year in her current school (4 weeks left). I am willing to do the drive, but grandma works at the school, so it's convenient for her, plus she wants to do it, and I am ok with it as long as we can get along, and there are no legal ramifications.
Questions:
1) I have been told I can just go and get daughter now, but I would like to do this with the transition approach, am I "opening the door" for grandma to go for custody b/c I am allowing her to stay there for these 6 weeks?
2) I am also filing to terminate child support, arrears, and name me as the primary residential parent, the judge wants a death certificate. Is it extremely important for me to get this petition filed (ex-parte, I'd rather grandma was unaware of it, unless it becomes necessary) before grandma tries to file a temporary custody order?
3) Grandma keeps telling me she will get me the cert. soon, but it's been 10 days now, and still no copy of the death certificate. I have checked online, but it is not listed in the county's records, is there any way to get a certified copy of this sooner?
4) DD is in counseling, and the counselor and I are on the same page. I have not explicitly told grandma that DD will be living with me (I am trying to make everything go as smooth as possible, I think it's still too soon for her, she just lost her only daughter). If we make any kind of agreements between gma and I in front of the therapist (such as "Dad has custody of DD, but we want her to continue in school, so gma will provide after school care for DD until the end of the term."). If the therapist' testifies to this, could that be a tool in case she tries to go for custody, and claims that I was willing for her to have custody by letting her stay there?
5) I really feel like there's no good solution for this, any other advice on a course of action that will ensure that a) I have sole custody and b) still keep a good relationship with grandma?
6) if gma were to try to get a temp. custody order, would she have to serve me first, or could she do it ex-parte? (I believe that's the right term)
7) any other suggestions?
