need advice now, please - emergency situation

[wonkothesane]

What is the name of your state? Florida (and Illinois)

I need advice right away becuase I need to act *now* (assuming I even have grounds to act)

Here's the situation:

Got divorced a couple of years ago in Illinois. I have 3 children. My ex wife and I have joint custody with NO court designated "custodial parent". But I now live in Florida and my wife has de facto guardenship.

About a month ago, on a visit to Illinois (because my ex's phone was cut off and I had no idea what was going on I went up there to check things out) anyway...on that visit my ex gave me my youngest child (5) to me to take back to Florida. There were no *legal* arrangements (stupid, I *know*, but it was an on-the-fly kinda thing) but my ex did sign a note, make a recorded statement, and the transfer of the child was doen in front of neutral witnesses (just in case she tried to claim I "stole" the child.

The note my ex signed said the I was to keep the child untill May 1st, or June 1st at the latest.

Now, my ex just called today and says she is comming for her on Staurday, and I have to give her back?

So why don't I just give her back? Well, if I *have* to I will, of course, but the conditions that my ex live under are appaling. My ex is disabled, in a wheelchair part time, HAS BEEN EVICTED (pending court appeal) for letting her convicted felon boyfriend (new hubby/whatever he is this week) live with her agains the housing authority - and the polices - warning that he is not to be there, and ALOS because her house is a filthy mess. She is living alone (well, a homeless guy is living with her, but he only sleeps there at night) and
she's been sick lately. The kids all wear dirty filthy clothes, are never bathed,
rarely make it to school, are poorly fed and often neglected. And my ex is dirt poor (he bf takes all the kids afdc and food stamps for himself.) I have called the Dept. of Children and Famlies but they just blow me off as a "jelous ex-husband" (athought I should call them right away seeing as how she is being exicted because of her messy house and the bf/whatever living there...)

And also, my daughter doesn't *want* to go back. She want's to stay here. She has told me and her mom this. (She wants her mom to move down here and I have *offered* to help her do this - even fund it to the best of my very, very limited abilities - but she refuses.)

So, is there ANY way I can *legally* make moves to keep my daughter??? Make some kind of legal appeal to a judge, get an emergency order???

There has got to be a way. I just can't afford a lawyer - at all - so I have to do anything myself, but I just *can't* see a judge *making* a child go back to live under these conditions. Only problem is we live in 2 different states, 300 miles apart, and a judge here won't be as aware as a judge there would be about it. And I *can* see a (local) police officer *make* me give her back.

There has *got* to be SOME action I can take, or am I just backed into a corner???

Any advice would be greately appreciated. (And feel free to email me as well: microgravitas@gmail.com )

- bryce

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state? Florida (and Illinois)

I need advice right away becuase I need to act *now* (assuming I even have grounds to act)

Here's the situation:

Got divorced a couple of years ago in Illinois. I have 3 children. My ex wife and I have joint custody with NO court designated "custodial parent". But I now live in Florida and my wife has de facto guardenship.

About a month ago, on a visit to Illinois (because my ex's phone was cut off and I had no idea what was going on I went up there to check things out) anyway...on that visit my ex gave me my youngest child (5) to me to take back to Florida. There were no *legal* arrangements (stupid, I *know*, but it was an on-the-fly kinda thing) but my ex did sign a note, make a recorded statement, and the transfer of the child was doen in front of neutral witnesses (just in case she tried to claim I "stole" the child.

The note my ex signed said the I was to keep the child untill May 1st, or June 1st at the latest.

Now, my ex just called today and says she is comming for her on Staurday, and I have to give her back?

So why don't I just give her back? Well, if I *have* to I will, of course, but the conditions that my ex live under are appaling. My ex is disabled, in a wheelchair part time, HAS BEEN EVICTED (pending court appeal) for letting her convicted felon boyfriend (new hubby/whatever he is this week) live with her agains the housing authority - and the polices - warning that he is not to be there, and ALOS because her house is a filthy mess. She is living alone (well, a homeless guy is living with her, but he only sleeps there at night) and
she's been sick lately. The kids all wear dirty filthy clothes, are never bathed,
rarely make it to school, are poorly fed and often neglected. And my ex is dirt poor (he bf takes all the kids afdc and food stamps for himself.) I have called the Dept. of Children and Famlies but they just blow me off as a "jelous ex-husband" (athought I should call them right away seeing as how she is being exicted because of her messy house and the bf/whatever living there...)

And also, my daughter doesn't *want* to go back. She want's to stay here. She has told me and her mom this. (She wants her mom to move down here and I have *offered* to help her do this - even fund it to the best of my very, very limited abilities - but she refuses.)

So, is there ANY way I can *legally* make moves to keep my daughter??? Make some kind of legal appeal to a judge, get an emergency order???

There has got to be a way. I just can't afford a lawyer - at all - so I have to do anything myself, but I just *can't* see a judge *making* a child go back to live under these conditions. Only problem is we live in 2 different states, 300 miles apart, and a judge here won't be as aware as a judge there would be about it. And I *can* see a (local) police officer *make* me give her back.

There has *got* to be SOME action I can take, or am I just backed into a corner???

Any advice would be greately appreciated. (And feel free to email me as well: microgravitas@gmail.com )

- bryce

You can file an emergency petition for custody...but you will need to do it in the state that has jursidiction. If the original custody orders were made in mom's state...then that is where you would need to file.

 

[wonkothesane]

You can file an emergency petition for custody...but you will need to do it in the state that has jursidiction. If the original custody orders were made in mom's state...then that is where you would need to file.

I suppose there is no way I can do this long distance???

 

[BelizeBreeze]

You can file an emergency petition for custody...but you will need to do it in the state that has jursidiction. If the original custody orders were made in mom's state...then that is where you would need to file.

He can file the emergency petition in Florida and ask the court to accept jurisdiction due to the circumstances. At the least, he'll have the issue before the court and they can fight it out.

 

[wonkothesane]

He can file the emergency petition in Florida and ask the court to accept jurisdiction due to the circumstances. At the least, he'll have the issue before the court and they can fight it out.

Does anyone know how I can do this without a lawyer? If there are papers to file, I'll do it myself first thing in the morning!

 

[LdiJ]

He can file the emergency petition in Florida and ask the court to accept jurisdiction due to the circumstances. At the least, he'll have the issue before the court and they can fight it out.

I agree...it could work....but I think that his chances would be greater in the state that currently has jurisdiction.

 

[LdiJ]

Does anyone know how I can do this without a lawyer? If there are papers to file, I'll do it myself first thing in the morning!

I know that the Florida State website provides a great deal of online forms for pro-se (without an attorney) petitions....unfortunately I don't have any links. Type "Florida" into your search engine...find the state government website and then search there for the forms. They DO exist online, I have been there....I just don't have the links and don't have the time to look for them.

 

[DianeJanay]

This might help

http://www.flcourts.org/
Hope this helps.

 

[DianeJanay]

Hope this one helps

Just type this in the address bar:www.flcourts.org and click on general public. There might be something there that can lead you in the right direction. When I tried to link to it, it would not work. So just type it in

 

[wonkothesane]

Just type this in the address bar:www.flcourts.org and click on general public. There might be something there that can lead you in the right direction. When I tried to link to it, it would not work. So just type it in

Thanks. I went to THIS page...

But so far only found a motion to petition for non-removial of children durring a pending litigation, and a motion to change the custody arrangements - but it has to be filed in the original county the custody arrangement was made in (and if you were in a different county is said, basically, "see your attourney".)

If I have to go up the Illinois to do this I will, but even there I just wouldn't be sure what to file.

If you can't afford a lawyer, you are screwed I guess because there is no one to help you if you are on your own...

 

[wonkothesane]

I'm going to go first thing tomorrow to to offices of Jacksonville Legal Aid...see if I can get *some* help. (But I'm not holding my breath.)

This is exactly why my ex just *sprang* this on me today...didn't want me to have a chance to fight back.

I wish I at least knew if I was *obligated* to just turn her over when she comes. Can the cops *make* me? I mean, my ex *did* give her to me.

It so frustrating because there is *always* some reason why the authorities say they are "backed into a corner" or their "hands are tied"...they always have "sympathy" for me, but in the end she always seems to have the advantage.

And my kids suffer for it.