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Needing advise on step parent adoption and terminating fathers rights

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bre456

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

I have a complicated situation, I have a son from a previous relationship who is now going to be 7, my ex (his father) has not been part of his life since he was 3, we split up when he was 2.5 and for a few months I made every attempt I could to make him part of his life until it was very well apparent that he was better of not having his father in his life as his father was a drug user and had court order supervised visitation that he did not exercise. well now 4 years later and no word from my ex (and I know from hearing from friends that he is a heroin addict and has been in and out of jail multiple times)we moved on with our lives, I had another child with someone else who has been my first sons father for the last 4 years now, as far as my son is concerned my finance is dad to him. well this is where things get tricky we are not married but have a child together and have been engaged for 3 years (living together for 4), he wants to adopt my oldest son, can we do this even if we are not married, second I don't know where my ex is to even get his consent can I have his right involuntarily terminated, I get child support from him but I am pretty sure its being pulled by the state out of unemployment. what are my options???? please help
 


Proserpina

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Arizona

I have a complicated situation, I have a son from a previous relationship who is now going to be 7, my ex (his father) has not been part of his life since he was 3, we split up when he was 2.5 and for a few months I made every attempt I could to make him part of his life until it was very well apparent that he was better of not having his father in his life as his father was a drug user and had court order supervised visitation that he did not exercise. well now 4 years later and no word from my ex (and I know from hearing from friends that he is a heroin addict and has been in and out of jail multiple times)we moved on with our lives, I had another child with someone else who has been my first sons father for the last 4 years now, as far as my son is concerned my finance is dad to him. well this is where things get tricky we are not married but have a child together and have been engaged for 3 years (living together for 4), he wants to adopt my oldest son, can we do this even if we are not married, second I don't know where my ex is to even get his consent can I have his right involuntarily terminated, I get child support from him but I am pretty sure its being pulled by the state out of unemployment. what are my options???? please help



Your fiance cannot adopt your son at this point, period.


Get married first. Stay married for a while. Then, speak with a local attorney; in some cases the lack of personal contact may constitute abandonment despite Dad paying child support.
 

Proserpina

Senior Member
What's the wait to get married? Go find a JOP and do the deed. :cool:

ETA: Fiance is not a step-parent until the paperwork is done.



And OP, please don't let your son grow up thinking that your fiance is his Dad. He's not.

He needs and deserves to know the truth.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
I don't have time to read all of this, nor to learn another state's laws -- but you do because it's your family:
http://www.azleg.state.az.us/ArizonaRevisedStatutes.asp?Title=8

Article 2 Termination of Parent-Child Relationship

The answer to your last question, generally, is no. However, see what you can find. Read carefully.
 

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