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Non-custodial parent moving out of State

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wendysuecpa

Junior Member
I have had her in counseling numerous times, but her dad always finds a way to turn the whole thing around & have the counseling stopped, even the counselor that he picked and went to court to get, he decided that he didn't like what the counselor had to say about his behavior, so he refuses to go or support our daughter going.
The step mom is a controlling bitch & I don't have to say anything to my daughter about that-the step mom says enough bad things to her about me.
Dad is the one moving across the country, not for a job or for any reason other than his wife wants to. Maybe he should figure out what abandonment of his daughter is going to do to her in the future and stop being so selfish & stay around until our daughter is 18. Believe me, I am rejoicing inside that he is going, but I still think he should stay for her sake.
 


haiku

Senior Member
Maybe he should figure out what abandonment of his daughter is going to do to her in the future and stop being so selfish & stay around until our daughter is 18. Believe me, I am rejoicing inside that he is going, but I still think he should stay for her sake.

oh so if he stays you will encourage the relationship, but if he goes you won't?

Seems to me if he does move, you will need to be MORE supportive of your daughters important relationship. Not LESS.

its YOU who holds the key**************.

think of the positives of your childs long distance realtionship, the cool things she may see or do in Arizona, and the time she gets with her dad. NOT the loss of YOUR time.....
 

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
I have had her in counseling numerous times, but her dad always finds a way to turn the whole thing around & have the counseling stopped, even the counselor that he picked and went to court to get, he decided that he didn't like what the counselor had to say about his behavior, so he refuses to go or support our daughter going.
The step mom is a controlling bitch & I don't have to say anything to my daughter about that-the step mom says enough bad things to her about me.
Dad is the one moving across the country, not for a job or for any reason other than his wife wants to. Maybe he should figure out what abandonment of his daughter is going to do to her in the future and stop being so selfish & stay around until our daughter is 18. Believe me, I am rejoicing inside that he is going, but I still think he should stay for her sake.

Listen lady, you came on this site asking a very simple question You received your answer a long time ago. When it wasn't the answer you WANTED to hear, you decided to claim domestic violence.

Do you think it's something that has NEVER happened on this forum?

Now, when that didn't work, the new wife is a controlling bitch.

That's been tried before also. The plain fact is, because you waited until you weren't getting the answer you wanted, you discounted those issues, as well as the grown son. And we, and by extension, the court, will also discount them.

You can decide what he should get all you want. The plain fact is the simple to the question of 'does he have the "RIGHT" to ask for these things'? is yes. Plain, simple and done.
 

wendysuecpa

Junior Member
Wow!

Listen lady, you came on this site asking a very simple question You received your answer a long time ago. When it wasn't the answer you WANTED to hear, you decided to claim domestic violence.

Do you think it's something that has NEVER happened on this forum?

Now, when that didn't work, the new wife is a controlling bitch.

That's been tried before also. The plain fact is, because you waited until you weren't getting the answer you wanted, you discounted those issues, as well as the grown son. And we, and by extension, the court, will also discount them.

You can decide what he should get all you want. The plain fact is the simple to the question of 'does he have the "RIGHT" to ask for these things'? is yes. Plain, simple and done.

You sound like a bitter non custodial parent. The domestic violence and new wife were always there, just trying to get the whole story out. Thankfully, the court is not an extension of you.
 

GrowUp!

Senior Member
1-untill she turns 18, she has no say in the visitation matter, she either goes, or YOU can be held in contempt, and be fined, jailed, or lose custody. 2-you can take her on vacation when she is with you. 3-yes they can,see number 1. she legally cant refuse
Wow Kelly...you are never short of ideas for screen names on here are you? You're up to how many fake email addys to create all of these screen names?! :rolleyes:
 

GrowUp!

Senior Member
You sound like a bitter non custodial parent.
Please deposit a quarter into the "every time someone like you has made that comment when you don't like the attitude given the OP" jar. I forget how much it's up to with your contribution, but I am sure it's enough for a one-way airline ticket to Cancun or Hawaii from any major airport in the Continental U.S.

The domestic violence and new wife were always there, just trying to get the whole story out.
And you didn't think to mention this in your FIRST post, huh? The new wife thing is irrlevant, but the DV thing is. To a point -- which was told to you already. But you didn't mention it until later replys.

Thankfully, the court is not an extension of you.
You have no idea. Unless making ignorant comments is your full-time job, you should stop. Like NOW.
 

wendysuecpa

Junior Member
Thanks

oh so if he stays you will encourage the relationship, but if he goes you won't?

Seems to me if he does move, you will need to be MORE supportive of your daughters important relationship. Not LESS.

its YOU who holds the key**************.

think of the positives of your childs long distance realtionship, the cool things she may see or do in Arizona, and the time she gets with her dad. NOT the loss of YOUR time.....

My ex has dragged our daughter to Arizona for the last 3 years during spring break, she's sick of it & doesn't want to go anymore. But I see what you are saying. I have been a parent to my kids for 27 years now & it's hard to let go. Especially when she cries and clings & begs me not to make her go. She didn't want to go 18 miles away for 6 weeks in a row, started having panic attacks, so what happens if she has to go 3000 miles away for 10 weeks in a row??? Her dad won't let her have any contact with me when she's with him. I feel like I'm between a rock & a hard place.
:(
 

wendysuecpa

Junior Member
Not gonna happen

guess what? SHE DOESNT HAVE A CHOICE WETHER OR NOT SHE GOES TO DAD'S. whatever the court order says goes, and unless you want to lose custody, you best obey it. dad doesnt have to allow the child to contact you on his time unless there is a court order allowing phone contact. you keep this up, and your daughter will be living with dad.

I always have & always will obey the court orders. Why doesn't anybody care what the child wants? If her dad didn't act like such a jerk all the time, she would want to spend more time with him.
 

Multimom

Member
IF your daughter is truly having panic attacks (diagnosed by a credible authority) then that is information that the court will take into consideration with regard to the length of her
stay, but if he's the one moving, they might require him to be solely responsible for the cost of the transportation both ways as moving was his decision.

Also they may take into consideration the strain on her education with the frequency issue.

However, he does have the "right to ask" but that doesn't necessarily mean he'll get what he is asking for.
 

demartian

Member
Sorry

I always have & always will obey the court orders. Why doesn't anybody care what the child wants? If her dad didn't act like such a jerk all the time, she would want to spend more time with him.

You may not realize this, but plenty of those who answer on here know exactly about domestic violence and the other issues you post of.

If there were a domestic violence issue that threatened your daughter in any way, then the father would have had SUPERVISED Scheduled Visitation written on his custody orders.

The fact that he is no longer getting any weeknights or weekends and only asking for 4 more weeks in the summer shows that he is simply asking for the number of days he already had.

No one here knows your story for real, but there is nothing wrong with that request and you have a right to hire an attorney and go after what you want as well.
 

CJane

Senior Member
IF your daughter is truly having panic attacks (diagnosed by a credible authority) then that is information that the court will take into consideration with regard to the length of her stay

Really? I don't think so. More likely, it's something that would result in the court telling mom to teach the child some coping skills, and to be more supportive of the time she's going to spend w/her father.

13 is a little old for separation anxiety.


Also they may take into consideration the strain on her education with the frequency issue.

There is no frequency issue. Dad wants holidays and summer. That's pretty standard, and it's all time that the child isn't in school.
 

h.flat

Junior Member
Run as fast as you can

What is the name of your state? Michigan
My ex is moving out of State, from Michigan to Arizona. Our divorce decree gives him every other weekend, Wednesday evenings until 8:30, every other holiday, every spring break, one week at Christmas and six weeks in the summer in three week intervals. He is now moving to Arizona. He wants 10 weeks in the summer, every spring break, every other holiday and one week at Christmas. He also expects me to drive her to Detroit or Chicago to catch a non-stop filight ( a six hour round trip each time). Our daughter is 13. She is involved in school, choir, swimming, friends, her whole life is here with me. She does not want to spend that much time in Arizona.
Does my ex legally have the right to these unreasonable demands?

OP, for your own good, lock this thread and stop responding asap. Use this site for entertainment purposes and not for advice. Because it seems to be impossible for them to just answer a question, you will get more questions, and each time you answer, you'll get more opinions that you don't want or need. Trying to defend yourself on this forum is almost impossible.

Unless you kiss butt and tell them how wonderful they are they'll come back with some sarcastic comment or - if they can't find anything to complain about, your paragraph structure or your spelling. If you enjoy reading the opinions of self-righteous couch potatos, questioning your parenting abilities, your morals, etc., then go for it. Otherwise, as I said, get out as soon as you can. Then when you're bored come here and pretend you're watching Jerry Springer.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
****yawn....**** :p
Don't you have a soap opera to watch now?

OP, for your own good, lock this thread and stop responding asap. Use this site for entertainment purposes and not for advice. Because it seems to be impossible for them to just answer a question, you will get more questions, and each time you answer, you'll get more opinions that you don't want or need. Trying to defend yourself on this forum is almost impossible.

Unless you kiss butt and tell them how wonderful they are they'll come back with some sarcastic comment or - if they can't find anything to complain about, your paragraph structure or your spelling. If you enjoy reading the opinions of self-righteous couch potatos, questioning your parenting abilities, your morals, etc., then go for it. Otherwise, as I said, get out as soon as you can. Then when you're bored come here and pretend you're watching Jerry Springer.
 

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