Not fulfilling visitation

[big girls mommy]

What is the name of your state? Ohio

My ex has visitation rights every wednesday and every other weekend. Wwe had some problems with the weekends a few months ago and since then, he has stopped seeing her on weekends. It has been about 3 1/2 months now that he hasn't bothered to pick her up for his weekend visit. All of a sudden I thought to myself, what if he tries to say that I don't allow him to get her? Totally untrue, on his weekends, we wait and see if he calls or show up and never does so we go on about our business. I don't want him to try to say I am in contempt when in fact, he isn't bothering to get her... should I call and tell someone that he isn't picking her up by choice in case he tries to report that I don't let him see her? He likes to try to get me into any trouble he can to make me look worse than him. I try to be honest and follow the rules and so far, none of his immature tricks have worked... thanks!!!

 

[bulldogg70]

You cannot force a donkey to drink the water. I would make a journal and just write a brief entry in it everytime he does not pick her up. You will have proof of such if he ever took you to court. The one thing I would suggest not doing is attempting to end his weekend visitation even if it takes a few months for him to get back on the ball again. Always have the child available for the minimum visitation schedule.
Hopefully he will see through it all and want to be a dad to his daughter.

 

[big girls mommy]

thanks for the quick reply. I am not trying to deny his visitation at all. When we had problems recently, as Common Pleas court said I should, get a calendar and write the weekends he gets her for his visitation. I did. I just don't want him to say I am denying him when in fact he is just not showing up to get her. I have no complaints about it however, that is just more time I get to hang out with my little princess!

 

[stealth2]

I email my ex confirming any of this sort of thing. If he calls, if he doesn't call, if he cancels visitation, etc. You may also want to have a third party present for the times when he is supposed to pick her up to corroborate that he didn't show.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

There is another issue that no one has yet to discuss. Would anyone care to take a shot????

 

[big girls mommy]

I am sorry but I do not know.....

 

[BelizeBreeze]

I know you don't. But the others do and I'm waiting for them

 

[snostar]

Is he still showing up for his Wed visits?

 

[big girls mommy]

Yes he picks her up from school on wednesdays and takes her thursday morning.

 

[bulldogg70]

I know you don't. But the others do and I'm waiting for them

Well, here it goes, I am sure it is one of these situtations where I give you an opportunity to make me look like an azz.

Anyway, I would feel if he attempts to say she violating the court order when he goes to court the burden of proof is on him to prove she is willfully obstructing his visitation. Further, though not argued he is actually in violation of the court order as well by not excercising his visitations or informing her of changes he needs, other than CS recalculations I might be missing the point of wisdon from you.

 

[snostar]

Visitation is a right, not an obligation therefore he does not have to utilizing his court ordered visits. As the others suggested, document missed visits and have a third party present at the time of pick up.

 

[big girls mommy]

I am going to just start logging everything. I don't know for sure that he will try anything but nothing he does suprises me.

 

[BelizeBreeze]

Since no one else has bothered to tell you, the child had better be ready for visitation at every moment during the time dad is court ordered to have visitation. While it's fine to document everything, the first time that dad appears at your door 12 hours late for visitation and the child is not there, you can bet your bippy that he will file a show cause for contempt action against you.

and THAT is what I was waiting for. Come on kids, you're letting me down

 

[stealth2]

Nah - just not playing your game.

 

[snostar]

While it's fine to document everything, the first time that dad appears at your door 12 hours late for visitation and the child is not there, you can bet your bippy that he will file a show cause for contempt action against you.

OH please! Are you on a sugar high? The OP stated, "on his weekends, we wait and see if he calls or show up and never does so we go on about our business." Of course he can file contempt anytime he damn well pleases, but do you think a judge will expect her and the child to be waiting at the door the ENITIRE weekend?