Other/ Dental Bill - College (not child support)

[x0il_lamp]

What is the name of your state? NY

My Ex has sent me a bill for my childs braces. In the decree it states, Ex has to consult me in any major desicion making (we have joint), but doesn't. I got an unexpected high bill without any advance notice, and ex demanded that I pay as outlined in the letter and checks are suppose to made out to him, and that rightaway.

I got really mad about this type of treatment, that I called the dentist and set up an payment schedule that I can handle and have been paying. I did not respond to ex's demands. Now ex threatens to let child support collections deduct this from my pay, if I don't respond. Do I have to respond?

I've allways paid everything I was suppose to and even more.

 

[snodderly]

The only way he can deduct anything from your pay is if he has a court order for a specific amount of money. He would have to take you to court for contempt and if he did that he would be cutting his nose off to spite his face because he is the one in contempt due to not involving you in such a major decision. Plus, a medical expense is entirely separate from child support. How does he logically think he is going to get that done?

He is just blowing smoke. Let him blow and turn a deaf ear to him. Tell him that you will not, in the future, pay any more bills that he runs up unless he first discusses the issue with you...as per the divorce decree.

You were smart to call the dental office. That is what my ex and I did when our son wore braces. We had separate accounts and it kept the conflict to a minimum.

 

[x0il_lamp]

I kinda thought so. He's been doing this sort of stuff for years, incl stonewalling anything regarding my kid. I know he's just out to stick me and I am just trying to keep my head over water hoping not to make a mistake (I am foreign).

Thanks much for your response!

 

[snodderly]

I'm aware of how it feels to have to question every move you make out of fear of making a mistake. My ex is a person who never follows court orders and keeps me on my toes constantly. It's hard not to feel threatened or intimidated when they pull their stunts and that is exactly what they want us to feel. I know one thing, if I had done some of the things my ex has done they would lock me up and throw away the key. It's that fear that keeps me on the striaght and narrow when dealing with him.

Just love you child and try not to let your ex get to you. Good luck!