phone documentation

[waitinMd]

What is the name of your state? Md

My ex has supervised visitation twice per week during the week and on Saturdays at her grandmothers house. Last week she was kicked out of her mothers house (even though the court order states she is to move back into her mothers house and continue to reside there).

She called me last Monday, said she was kicked out and that she would call me to set visitation for Tues/Thurs. She never called back. On Friday night her grandmother canceled for Saturday. My ex didn't know it was canceled until she showed up at the grandmothers. She called me 3.5 hours after the court ordered visitation and wanted to see her somewhere else, but I had made other plans. Plus the court order states 'ms x will have supervised visitation at Mrs. X's house Saturday from x to x.' It does not give an alternate location.

Today I got a call from my atty's paralegal saying her lawyer sent an urgent fax saying more or less that I don't control the visitation. I don't have a way to call her! I was at the designated visitation spot during the week, she did not show up. My ex lied to her lawyer and said she has been trying to call me and leaving numbers for me to call her back. I have messages from her on my phone that say 'I will call you back on a different number, I don't know where I will be'. I called one cell phone number she called me from and no one answered the phone, I got the voice mail.

We agreed to Tueday morning at 10 am and Thurs night at 5:30 am, but she is now saying she did not agree to that. She told me to schedule my college classes any time I wanted because she could work her own schedule, now she is saying she didn't say that.

I can't prove she didn't call me until after the hearing, as my bill will not be generated until the 30th of August, the hearing is the week before.

Let me also add, she was positive for meth her last hair follicle test. Her family was supposed to get hair follicle tests 7 days from our hearing, and so far have not done so, plus she has new criminal charges filed against her, as of last week.

What is the best way to document and handle this situation?
Is it unreasonable to ask if we have set days/times?
Can I ask that she put everything in writing? She has been very violent lately, then she hangs the phone up on me.
Thanks

 

[CJane]

What is the best way to document and handle this situation?

My cell phone co has 'ongoing tracking' on their website, so that I can log in anytime and see all the calls that were made/received in the past 24 hours. See if you can do something like that, or if you can call CS and briefly explain the situation - they should be able to generate a call list.

Is it unreasonable to ask if we have set days/times?

Absolutely not.

Can I ask that she put everything in writing?

Yes. Request contact only by email - and when she says she doesn't have access, remind her that any library does.

She has been very violent lately, then she hangs the phone up on me.
Thanks

She can't be violent on the phone. She's unreasonable.

 

[waitinMd]

Thank you very much, great suggestions...

and yes unreasonable on the phone, but 'horrid' in person.

I know she will say, I can't email you because I have no transportation, but she can put it in writing and we can both sign it when we meet for the visitation.

I am worried she will ask that visits be at this new boyfriends house. This one is as bad as the last one!

 

[CJane]

I know she will say, I can't email you because I have no transportation, but she can put it in writing and we can both sign it when we meet for the visitation.

I think that's an excellent alternative... and it gives you notice of the next week's visitation.

I am worried she will ask that visits be at this new boyfriends house. This one is as bad as the last one!

I thought she married the last one?

I don't think you'd have any issues at all getting the judge to order that visitation NOT take place there. And if she's no longer living where she's ORDERED to live... you might not have issues having visitation suspended altogether.

 

[waitinMd]

We thought she married the last one also. She said she did, and then told the judge she was 'engaged', in fact her lawyer put it in a motion that they were engaged and that his house would be 'fit' to have the child .. blah blah blah....

In Dec 06, Feb 07 and then just recently, the lovebirds have charged each other with criminal charges/domestic violence. She didn't have witnesses, he had very credible witnesses. They are no longer engaged.. but they go back and forth. Now she has a new bf, previous charges of drug/alcohol abuse, but nothing recent. His home does not even look livable. I thought it was abanded.

I'm sure her lawyer will argue that Ms. X was kicked out of her house and then probably say that it is because of 'her' mothers bf, who has documented domestic violence charges against him concerning this entire family.

My ex's mothers bf is not allowed around the baby either. Last hearing the judge said, "visitation may be at Mrs. X's home (My ex's mother) beginning the Monday following negative hair follicle tests submitted by Mrs. X and Mrs. X's mother (my ex's grandmother). It is further ordered that Mr. X (ex's bf), and Mrs. X's boyfriend may not be present during the visitation." The hair follicle tests have not happened thus far.

I also do not like calling all these cell phone numbers she calls me from. She changes friends all the time, seems like every 2 weeks. I don't want to call a boyfriends cell phone, especially during the day when he is at work. I went through that with the first bf, and he constantly interfered. It makes them think they have rights. I have enough of a hard time dealing with her!

Thnks again...