Please HELP!!

[scaredmom123]

What is the name of your state? Ohio

This is a complicated story. I have to appologize already, because I know this is going to be long and I'm really upset. I have primary custody of my daughter. Her father has visitation EOWeekend. He owns a duplex in a bad neighborhood. He has been SLEEPING during my daughters entire visits for the last 6 months or so!!! He is staying up during the wee-night hours and sleeping the entire daylight hours when my child is awake. There is another daughter involved also. My daughter was fending for herself and her half-sister during the day. My daughter is only 10 years old!! The half-sister is 7yo. Lately, the woman who rents the other apartment in this duplex has been keeping an eye on the girls. She has been feeding them, taking them places and bringing my daughter home when the visit is over. I am irate! This woman is very nice to be doing this, but this is not her business. I am appreciative that the woman has stepped in to take care of my child while she is there, and I have no ill feelings toward this woman. My problem is the father! I had contacted my lawyer months and months ago and he supposedly filed emergency paperwork, but tells me that the court system is all backed up. It has been 5 months!!! He is telling me that I have to send my daughter or I will be held in contempt of court, thus risk the chance of losing my daughter??? What kind of justice system is this? My daughter lives here with her step-dad and myself. She is loved, clean, well nourished, a little spoiled and always looked after at all times. Who in their right mind would threaten to take my daughter from a home that she is loved and taken care of? I just don't get this and maybe I am wrong, but I don't think my daughter should have to go to her fathers house if he plans to spend no time with her. I started taking her to a therapist because she was having a lot of anxiety problems. The therapist contacted Children and Youth Services about the father. They dismissed the case!!! After not even checking into anything or contacting my daughters father or us. I am so confused. Where are the rights of my 10yo little girl in this?? I don't understand how the court system can be too backed up to help us. My question is does anyone have a similar situation? What was your outcome? This cannot be right! My daughter should not be forced in a situation that is unhealthy to her!!! I feel so helpless! Can anyone offer legal advice?

 

[scaredmom123]

I just wanted to add that the counselor my daughter has been seeing cannot help us without a court order. And I cannot get to court to get an order!!!Originally she had stated that if my lawyer were to contact her in writing she would give him a written statement, well after talking with her boss she cannot do this without a court order signed by a judge. My lawyer is confusing me saying "go ahead and don't send" my daughter next time, then saying "You could lose custody because of contempt." Please ... someone has to be able to offer some advice??????

 

[Smarty Panties]

I could be mistaken but I'm pretty sure ex parte petitions are supposed to be heard within 30 days. I would be checking to see if your lawyer actually filed anything.

In the mean time, he's right. you have to send her or risk contempt.

 

[scaredmom123]

Well, that is what I thought too. My lawyer is telling me that the court system is all backed up in civil trials. I think he's full of S^%$. I just don't know how to go about finding that information out to find out if he is a liar.

 

[MinCA]

"What kind of justice system is this?" It's an INjustice system.

"This woman is very nice to be doing this, but this is not her business." It may not be her legal business, but it if her moral business to make sure that helpless children don't starve for a few days. Would you rather these girls be hungry for the weekend?

Here are your options regarding sending her, and neither if fair to your daughter. You can withhold her and risk contempt and the father getting sole custody and she'd be there all the time, or send her every other weekend and only let the wolf have her part-time.

If the neighbor willing to go to court and testify to his negligence and lack of interest in the child? Does he even know that the girls are gone while he sleeps?

Make sure your attorney filed something, an ex parte for emergency protection or something. Anything to keep her from having to go back to a place where she is definitely unsafe and unsupervised.

Has this been before a judge at all?

 

[scaredmom123]

I am grateful that this woman is helping my daughter and her half-sister out. Believe me! I'm just saying that this should not be going on at all! This woman is a savior in my eyes right now, but who knows how long she will put up with this crap from the father ... and what happens when this woman has had enough and moves out? Then what happens to my daughter? That is what I am concerned about ... plus, I don't think it is right to send my child to her fathers while he is sleeping period.

Thanks for your advice. I just wanted to clear that up. This woman will not testify anything in court unless I subpeona her since my daughters father is the owner of the duplex she is residing in. I have asked her, and she is too afraid because she has kids of her own and needs a place to live.

I don't think my attorney has done jack squat. I have listened to the lies ... and believed them about the whole civil hearing stuff taking up the courts time ... I think it's a line of crap. Do I actually have to pay this man for stuff he has lied about?

 

[MinCA]

Unfortunately, if you don't, the attorney can hold your casefile "hostage," but if you can prove he lied, you may have grounds for a lawsuit against him.

 

[sugarj]

You should be able to call the clerks office in the county that your case would be heard. They should be able to confirm if anything has been filed. They can usually do a query by name but just in case it has been misspelled in the system, have the case number handy. I think that it would have the same case number as your divorce, etc. They should also be able to tell you the time frame that emergency orders are heard. good luck

 

[scaredmom123]

I called the prothonotary's office a couple weeks ago ... the lawyer filed nothing!!! I just couldn't believe it. Now he won't return my calls. So, I went and got a new lawyer who filed paperwork already. My new lawyer feels this is an environment with a lot of red flags for my child and her half-sister. Also, dad sleeps all the time - does nothing with them. It will be about 5 weeks until I get to go to court with a modification for custody. The new lawyer believes my chances are good and we'll subpoena the counselor who will testify that she has concerns. New lawyer also wants to order a psychological exam for dad since he is sleeping all the time. He has past drug and alcohol issues ... I don't think he's into that now ... must be depression or something??? I just don't know why my daughters father wants her at all for visitation in his current state of mind? Can anyone answer that? My new lawyer is questioning the same thing.

 

[Jillian483]

Very Important!!!!

You CAN deny him visitation if the child is being neglected!!!! Subpoena you therapist to have her testify on your behalf if you are held in contempt. State that your child is having a lot of emotional problems because of her fathers actions!!!!