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Question about custody...

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acmb05

Senior Member
Can anyone tell me what I would need to do? Based on the false addresses, not returning her etc?

At this point nothing because it has not happened yet. You have documented evidence it happened in the past and that can be brought up in court. If he does it again then call the police again and file contempt again.
 


maryjo

Member
I am sorry that I have come here for advice. I read on here alot and have found alot of answers to other small questions. But apparently some people have no thoughts about what is best for a child. I cannot tell you of one GOOD parent that would think that dragging a child around like that (not like Military etc. where there is a residence etc.) would be in the childs best interest.

I will not argue with anyone or be rude. I appricate the responses but do not agree. If there is no case, then just saying - "your concerns are not valid in court and you cannot do anything." would have been sufficent. I appriciate the people who were not rude.

Thank you.


I am a good parent and I think a child getting to see different planes for a couple weeks during the summer is a GREAT idea. Sounds like a vacation to me! My son would love it. At first I thought you had said they were going to be drug all over the country. But its COUNTY. How far could they possibly go?! Tons of people take vacations for weeks at a time and stay in different hotels.

Oh, earlier you were talking about having to go to the doctor or whatever. If the child has insurance it shouldnt be a problem. Why wouldnt the visits be covered by insurance? If nothing else they could take the child to Solantic (in Florida...dont know if they have them elsewhere). They take insurance or they will take you without it. Its the best thing in an emergency in my opinion. In fact, until they changed to acute care and started charging more, I used to take my son there every time he got sick. They dont need records to diagnose an illness. And its MUCH cheaper than the ER.

I think you are thinking too hard about this. Everyone here has the child's best interest at heart. What you seem to think is best for the child is what YOU want. What you want and what is legal are obivously two different things. Its also fact that everyone here also knows the law and they arent going to tell you what you want to hear just to make you feel good. They are going to tell you the correct legal advice whether its all happy happy for you...or not. You are going to have to face the facts that the father IS going to be in this child's life and that it isnt going to be on YOUR terms.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
No, I think it really IS all over the country. But still - so what? The main issues brandie seems to have are clothes, meds and possible doctor visits.

Well..... I don't know many places w/o a laundromat. And seriously - at 5 in the summer, she needs clean underwear and socks daily. A bathing suit or two. Everything else can be laundered as needed at..... the laundromat. If meds are needed - pretty much every town has..... a drug store! They can even get prescription items if needed. There's that funky new invention that lets them do that - it's called a phone. Doctor visits? Urgent care. Come *on*, brandie - your complaints are absurd. Your kid won't die staying in a hotel for the summer.
 

CJane

Senior Member
Are you kidding? When I was younger we went on 2 months summer vacations all over the U.S. and stayed in motels. I would think a child would be excited about traveling around the Country and seeing all the wonders this Country has to offer.

We were too poor for hotels. So we camped. For weeks at a time. On trips from Kansas out to Colorado and back through Oklahoma and Arkansas. Altitude, climate, thunderstorms, HOT weather... all in a TENT w/my mom, step-dad, gramma, dogs, 7 kids and usually an extra kid or two for good measure.

We would have LOVED a hotel for just a couple of those weeks.

And it's NOT for 6 weeks, Mom. Though that was a nice shot at being overly dramatic. It's for TWO WEEKS 3x during the summer. I would assume she comes home in between those 2 week blocks for a change of clothes or two.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
maybe it makes brandie's hair frizzy .... since I live in the humid south ...

Brandie, you can either teach your child to embrace change, or have her as small-minded as you are at this time. Think of all she could write on "What I did for my summer vacation."
 
If the order says the father has 3 blocks of two week visitation during the summer he does. He has the right to take her wherever he wants. Your main concern should be if she is going to be returned to you as agreed upon. Otherwise, everything else is nil. See if the father would be willing to give you their itinerary so you can call and speak with your daughter during her 2 week vacation. Until you have concrete proof he's a danger to her well being, then you're out of luck.
 
My main concern is not the clothes, meds, etc. The MAIN concern is that they have given me and the courts false addresses, taken her before and not returned her! The other concerns are only secondary. If you all say that they don't matter, then they don't. That's fine.

Like I said, my main concern is that they constantly move and don't provide me with the addresses, have given false addresses to me and the courts and refused to return her.
I don't agree that staying in a motel room is best but - the main point is - they will be moved frequently around the COUNTRY and I am VERY concerned about them moving places and not giving me correct information and/or not bringing her back, especially after they are mad because of the child support issues. And because they have made this a habit.

That is my main concern..... what do I do if they won't give me correct info and then don't return her (and because they have given false addresses etc. I have no idea even where to start looking)?

Thanks for everyones responses. As I said, My main concerns are not the clothes, etc. That is just my thoughts because I would not do that. But the Main problem is the false address etc. and if they choose not to return her, I would have no idea where to start looking because they will be all over the country, no one location.
 

TinkerBelleLuvr

Senior Member
Actually, I do understand your concern. I went thru a debacle last summer when my X did not return my child. I'm still paying on that one.

Hopefully you documented with the court that the child was not returned properly.

If you child is NOT returned, then file for contempt immediately. You have the option of doing an amber alert. Any further problems, you can request that they issue a high enough bond that would be used to pay your attorney fees, and other cost in retrieving a child.
 
Thank you Ginny J.

So basically what I was wanting to know is- is there anything I can do to be proactive, to keep this from happening?

My understanding from your post and others I have read is basically that I have to wait for it to happen, then deal with it.

I will just do my best to keep track of them, thanks alot for the responses!
 
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