really confused

[upset_wisconsin]

What is the name of your state? Wisconsin

My husband only acts like a dad when he want sto be he verybally abuses me in front of our child. She is only one and i know she does not understand but last night when she was crying for me he flung her at me. He said fine go find another daddy. Though he did not toss her but a couple of inches and we were in bed is this physical abuse is it verbal abuse if so can it be used in court

 

[HomeGuru]

What is the name of your state? Wisconsin

My husband only acts like a dad when he want sto be he verybally abuses me in front of our child. She is only one and i know she does not understand but last night when she was crying for me he flung her at me. He said fine go find another daddy. Though he did not toss her but a couple of inches and we were in bed is this physical abuse is it verbal abuse if so can it be used in court

**A: yes, she is not a Raggedy Ann doll, right?

 

[Gilly Bean]

It all starts somewhere, so my guess is, it will only get worse. Get out before it does. Whether you love him or not right now, the child should be placed first in this situation.

 

[hmmbrdzz]

What is the name of your state? Wisconsin

My husband only acts like a dad when he want sto be he verybally abuses me in front of our child. She is only one and i know she does not understand but last night when she was crying for me he flung her at me. He said fine go find another daddy. Though he did not toss her but a couple of inches and we were in bed is this physical abuse is it verbal abuse if so can it be used in court

======================================

Question: Was the child in bed with you during an argument, and if so -- why? Does she sleep with you all; were you just laying around; were you in a heated discussion on the bed and trying to tend to daughter at the same time, etc. etc. Second question: how can he "fling" her or "toss" her at you "but a couple of inches" ? I'm not saying he's not abusive and that you don't need to show him the &%$&#* door, but I can't help but question your description of what happened because it's impossible to fling and/or toss a one-year old child a couple of inches (therefore your allegations of "abuse" might not fly). It almost sounds like you're making excuses for him. Don't. If he's being abusve, get rid of his sorry a** and file for divorce and custody. But describe any "abuse" as it actually occurred. If he was angry at the child and handed the child to you and angrily said "fine -- go find another daddy", then say that's what happened. Otherwise, you won't sound credible. Best of luck to you.


hmmbrdzz

 

[Gilly Bean]

**side note**

It's possible he flung the child towards her, and she caught the kid before anything serious happened. If he did it with any force at all other than just handing the baby over, i'd consider it to be flinging. Especially if the child left his hands before she caught her, then it's definatly not something to take lightly.

 

[hmmbrdzz]

I agree that this incident isn't something to take lightly, but she has stated her husband is abusive and has used only this incident as an example. She can use this incident against him, but if she does she'll be required to describe it in detail. To me, she sounds kind of "iffy" about it (as if she is uncertain herself as to whether the incident constitutes abuse). She somehow needs to get around sounding uncertain about the allegations of abuse. I guess that's what I'm trying to point out to her.




hmmbrdzz

 

[fear4life]

I am not sure that this would actually constitute as child abuse due to the fact that your child was not hurt in the process (at least not that you have stated). But as others have said, incidents like this tend to eventually increase, especially when one is angry. Don't let him take his frustrations out on your child!! You also mentioned he is verbally abusive towards you but that your child is too young to understand. Speaking from experience though she may not understand fully...she is capable of understanding that daddy is being mean to mommy and making her upset. If you continue to let this man treat you or your daughter that way, serious problems are bound to arise in the future.

 

[upset_wisconsin]

To answers all the questions no we were not laying around arguiing she was fussy i went to get a bottle when i came back i laid down beside him. I am not iffy i know that he flung her because i had to cathch her before anyharm was done.. He does verbally abuse me and i belive it is affection our child please understand i want to file for divorce but we live with his parents and i don't know how to get my child out of here with me for any help please respond

 

[nurse_nan]

Every state in the union has provisions for women who are attempting to leave an abusive situation without resources to support themselves. That goes double if you have children. Go to your local hospital or police department, ask for assistance in leaving an abusive situation. The social services department of the hospital will have tons of resources for shelters that will assist you in leaving and will protect your anonymity if you are afraid he will hurt you for leaving. And keep a journal... Clear statements regarding what was actually said and done. NO opinions, no emotions just the facts, ma'am. You come across much more stable and credible if you can just state the facts. Dates, times, witnesses.