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K
krispenstpeter
Guest
NO *hit!
Now, read through my entire number of responses and maybe you'll get the hint.
You need to....
get an attorney. I'm not as well versed at all as some of the posters here but you are living a dream world if you think you can just skate thru a divorce with children involved.
If you end up the custodial parent, she may end up paying you. If she is the CP, you may end up paying her.
Either way, while things may look agreeable at this stage, it can and, probably will, get not so agreeable at some point. Especially considering you are now with someone else and having another baby. You really do need to wake up here and get some good legal advice. It will be worth it's weight in gold.
Take some time and read some of the posts on here. Perfectly, nice, normal, agreeable people have posted some horrors stories of things that went from "we agree on everything" to "I want to take him/her for everything." Educate yourself, it will be worth your time.
get an attorney. I'm not as well versed at all as some of the posters here but you are living a dream world if you think you can just skate thru a divorce with children involved.
If you end up the custodial parent, she may end up paying you. If she is the CP, you may end up paying her.
Either way, while things may look agreeable at this stage, it can and, probably will, get not so agreeable at some point. Especially considering you are now with someone else and having another baby. You really do need to wake up here and get some good legal advice. It will be worth it's weight in gold.
Take some time and read some of the posts on here. Perfectly, nice, normal, agreeable people have posted some horrors stories of things that went from "we agree on everything" to "I want to take him/her for everything." Educate yourself, it will be worth your time.
Inquiry123
Member
Half of the bras?!
RLD -
Fair or not, many of the components of a divorce (including spousal support and child support) could be viewed as a business transaction between you and your wife. The state of KY has it's own standard support guidelines that it will use to set a "fair" amount of child support based upon the gross income of the CP and the gross income of the NCP. It doesn't look like the standard guidelines for KY take into account the number of overnight visits that the children have with the NCP.
That's not to say that an AGREEMENT between the CP and NCP as to a fair amount of support (if any) would not be accepted by the court. In a true 50/50 custody split such as you describe, both parents could AGREE that each would be bearing an equal amount of financial responsibility for the children. I don't see that happening in your case. Your wife is asking for support, and she'll most likely get at least the state minimum based on your incomes unless you can convince her to agree with your argument. I'm not taking that bet.
How long were you married? What are the children's gender and ages? Have you been practicing the 50/50 custody arrangement for the past year? Would you have been considered the children's primary caregiver before you moved out? Who supplies the free child care? Questions similar to these would be considered by the court if it came down to a fight for 'primary' custody and spousal support between you and your wife.
As Jenni said, a consult with a Family Law att'y wouldn't hurt...you need to get an idea of the normal and worst case senarios for your situation. The att'y would be able to give you some idea of the merits of your argument for YOUR state. Get a realistic idea of your options and then get down to business (negotiation.) Then decide for yourself if you are going to need an attorney to 'fight to the death' or if you can reach an agreement between you and your wife. BUT, even if you agree, I strongly recommend that you counsel with someone with EXPERIENCE in divorce issues and have them review your agreement BEFORE you sign-off.
Krispenstpeter is right, IMO. I know this won't sound fair...and maybe it isn't entirely. Your argument isn't very strong as far as support is concerned. Are you going to buy half of the kid's clothes every week? Half of their bras? Half of their school lunch ticket? Half of their backpack? Half of their haircut? Half of a ton of other things that are constantly purchased by one of the parents even in a 50/50 arrangement? It's too messy...and that's part of the reason the NCP pays a fixed amount. In some states, your argument would have more weight...you would receive a large deduction in the amount of support you would be obligated to pay based on the idea that you have the children 50% of the time and provide for food, shelter, transportation, etc. while they are with you.
I'm sure you already know this deep inside...the time you spend with your kids is infinitely more valuable than any amount of support you may be required to pay. Get the support straight and then forget about it -- love those kids! After you read a few of the stories on this forum, you'll feel BLESSED to pay $300 and have your kids HALF (wow!) of the time. Good luck.
RLD -
Fair or not, many of the components of a divorce (including spousal support and child support) could be viewed as a business transaction between you and your wife. The state of KY has it's own standard support guidelines that it will use to set a "fair" amount of child support based upon the gross income of the CP and the gross income of the NCP. It doesn't look like the standard guidelines for KY take into account the number of overnight visits that the children have with the NCP.
That's not to say that an AGREEMENT between the CP and NCP as to a fair amount of support (if any) would not be accepted by the court. In a true 50/50 custody split such as you describe, both parents could AGREE that each would be bearing an equal amount of financial responsibility for the children. I don't see that happening in your case. Your wife is asking for support, and she'll most likely get at least the state minimum based on your incomes unless you can convince her to agree with your argument. I'm not taking that bet.
How long were you married? What are the children's gender and ages? Have you been practicing the 50/50 custody arrangement for the past year? Would you have been considered the children's primary caregiver before you moved out? Who supplies the free child care? Questions similar to these would be considered by the court if it came down to a fight for 'primary' custody and spousal support between you and your wife.
As Jenni said, a consult with a Family Law att'y wouldn't hurt...you need to get an idea of the normal and worst case senarios for your situation. The att'y would be able to give you some idea of the merits of your argument for YOUR state. Get a realistic idea of your options and then get down to business (negotiation.) Then decide for yourself if you are going to need an attorney to 'fight to the death' or if you can reach an agreement between you and your wife. BUT, even if you agree, I strongly recommend that you counsel with someone with EXPERIENCE in divorce issues and have them review your agreement BEFORE you sign-off.
Krispenstpeter is right, IMO. I know this won't sound fair...and maybe it isn't entirely. Your argument isn't very strong as far as support is concerned. Are you going to buy half of the kid's clothes every week? Half of their bras? Half of their school lunch ticket? Half of their backpack? Half of their haircut? Half of a ton of other things that are constantly purchased by one of the parents even in a 50/50 arrangement? It's too messy...and that's part of the reason the NCP pays a fixed amount. In some states, your argument would have more weight...you would receive a large deduction in the amount of support you would be obligated to pay based on the idea that you have the children 50% of the time and provide for food, shelter, transportation, etc. while they are with you.
I'm sure you already know this deep inside...the time you spend with your kids is infinitely more valuable than any amount of support you may be required to pay. Get the support straight and then forget about it -- love those kids! After you read a few of the stories on this forum, you'll feel BLESSED to pay $300 and have your kids HALF (wow!) of the time. Good luck.
L
Lil Miss Smarty Panties
Guest
Inquiry, you're a regular with a new name, aren't ya? Just tell me I'm correct. 
Inquiry123
Member
I wish!
Nope...I'm somewhat "irregular". But the fiber seems to be helping.
Nope...I'm somewhat "irregular". But the fiber seems to be helping.