Slander or Libel or Defamation of Character?

[midwestmissy]

I have a situation that I would like to know if it is illegal in any way and how and what can be done to stop it? My ex boyfriend in Missouri has put a message on his answering machine that says he is screening calls and it lists both my first and last name and refers to me as "demented and psycho." The only way I found out about this was through a mutual friend that called and told me about it. Apparently he has been receiving some hang up calls and has accused me of them without bothering to research who the calls are actually coming from. He has also told various lies about me to many different individuals and accused me of harrassment and other things. I haven't called or spoken to him in at least 3 weeks and have no desire to ever contact him in the future. The only communication I have had has been instigated on his part. My concern is that awhile ago I had listed him as a reference for several jobs. Obviously I am no longer using him as a reference, but we had worked together at one time and he was able to provide a reference for me. My concern is that people, possible employers, may be calling his number and hearing this message on his answering machine. I've also received phone calls from one of his friends calling me psycho. He seems to have told quite a few lies to many people about me and I would like to have it stopped, but I don't know how. I feel that it's basically ruining my reputation. I'd like to have this man leave me alone, but I don't know how to get him to stop all the name calling. I know that a restraining order will keep him away and I am not concerned about that being that he is in Missouri and I am in Kansas, but how do I get him to stop the slander? Do I have any rights or am I supposed to just live with it?

 

[dorenephilpot]

First, you need to give us a state name AS THE INSTRUCTIONS IN BOLD, RED LETTERS SPECIFY.

Second, in order to sue someone for slander or libel, you have to show communication to others (looks like you have met this requirement).

You also have to show actual damages (such as loss of reputation, business, money, etc.).

However, if the guy doesn't own anything of value, then it's probably not worth fighting over.

If he finds out it bothers you, he won.

If you ignore it and don't suffer any damages, he'll eventually get over his rage and move on to his next person to blame for all his own problems.

Best of luck to you.