sole custody VS joint custody

[wildthing]

State of Indiana. Does anyone know the pros and cons of sole custody VS joint costody. A friend's husband has jost told her he wants a divorce and that he will be willing to keep this a "nice divorce" as long as she agrees to let him have joint custody of their 3 year old son.

 

[meleahk1]

joint means just that! JOINT. and sole means just that Sole.

joint-both parents share in all decisions of the child/ren etc.

sole-on the custodial parent makes those decisions and does not have to let the ncp know.

however, the ncp will still have visitation rights and will still have to pay child support

 

[wildthing]

Her main concern seems to be if she gives him joint custody does he have to pay support? Or does the child live with mom for 6 months and dad 6 months? Also can he take the child out of state without her permission (he has family in another state). I told her that if she gave him joint custody she should ask for phisical custody, that way the child lives with her and her ex will have to pay support. Was my advise accurate?
They are talking about doing the divorce themselves and not using a attorney. I told her that even if she didn't hire a attorney it would be worth her time & effort to at least talk to a attorney, even if he charged her a couple hundred for the consult.

 

[dorenephilpot]

There's "joint legal" and "joint physical."

With joint legal, the two parents share equally in decisions on the big issues in a child's life, such as medical issues, religion, education.

With joint physical, the parties spend equal time with the child. Whether there is support money that changes hands depends on whether the time is truly split 50-50 and whether there is a disparity in income. If there IS a disparity, even if the parties share time w/the child equally, the one who makes more money will pay support to the one who makes less money.

Judges usually order joint legal custody. However, they usually do NOT order joint physical. Why not? It's really unworkable for kids who have reached school age, unless the parents get along beautifully, live in the same school district and agree on everything.

When two people are divorced, they just don't agree on things. That's why joint physical doesn't work except in very rare circumstances.

That's why judges give primary physical custody to one parent, even if they give joint legal custody to both.

The parties can AGREE to anything they want in a settlement agreement, that is later signed off on by the court, but if it goes before a judge, count on ONE parent getting primary physical custody.

Hope this helps answer your questions....