Stepparent Adoption

[ekfoote]

NC Stepparent Adoption

I'm interested in information regarding stepfather adoption of minor child where the biological father is deceased. What are the steps in order to proceed with the adoption? We are married, there are no ties to biological grandparents. Any information would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks,
Emily

 

[Just Blue]

NC Stepparent Adoption

I'm interested in information regarding stepfather adoption of minor child where the biological father is deceased. What are the steps in order to proceed with the adoption? We are married, there are no ties to biological grandparents. Any information would be greatly appreciated!

Thanks,
Emily

Hire an Adoption Attorney. Adoption is not a "do it yourself" project.

 

[ekfoote]

Thanks for your advice however given the circumstances I was advised the process would be pretty straight forward since there is no need for relinquishment of parental rights from biological father. I have the certificate of death and all neccessary documents to support this. I will continue to seek information on this to avoid any unneccessary expenses from an attorney.

thanks,
Emily

 

[Just Blue]

Thanks for your advice however given the circumstances I was advised the process would be pretty straight forward since there is no need for relinquishment of parental rights from biological father. I have the certificate of death and all neccessary documents to support this. I will continue to seek information on this to avoid any unneccessary expenses from an attorney.

thanks,
Emily

"unneccessary expenses"? Okay then.

 

[ekfoote]

I'm sorry, I must have misunderstood the purpose of this site. I was under the impression I would get advice from an attorney, not unwarranted sarcasm.

thank you for your comments

 

[LdiJ]

I'm sorry, I must have misunderstood the purpose of this site. I was under the impression I would get advice from an attorney, not unwarranted sarcasm.

thank you for your comments

Adoption is honestly not a DIY project. Too many things can go wrong.

 

[Just Blue]

I'm sorry, I must have misunderstood the purpose of this site. I was under the impression I would get advice from an attorney, not unwarranted sarcasm.

thank you for your comments

You did not read the TOS.

I was not being sarcastic. It is interesting that you wouldn't want to handle this most important legal matter in a way that will most benifit your child/ren.

You do understand that once the adoption happens then STBF will have the same legal rights and obligations as you do...right? Then means in the event of a divorce, he could end up with custody and you will be ordered to pay child support. Or he could be NCP with visitation rights and a support order.

Good luck
Blue

 

[ekfoote]

I understand that going through an attorney is the best way but I was told by an attorney at our church that it would be an easy enough process that we could handle ourselves without having to pay for an attorney. As far as divorce goes, that isn't an option for us, and if it were, I would want him to have visitation rights. So I fully understand what would happen if that were to occur. Thanks you all, I will contact the attorney at our church for details.

 

[Just Blue]

I understand that going through an attorney is the best way but I was told by an attorney at our church that it would be an easy enough process that we could handle ourselves without having to pay for an attorney. As far as divorce goes, that isn't an option for us, and if it were, I would want him to have visitation rights. So I fully understand what would happen if that were to occur. Thanks you all, I will contact the attorney at our church for details.

Is the church friend/attorney an adoption attorney? If not...Just ask for a referral to one.

Again...Good luck.

 

[Zigner]

Thanks for your advice however given the circumstances I was advised the process would be pretty straight forward since there is no need for relinquishment of parental rights from biological father. I have the certificate of death and all neccessary documents to support this. I will continue to seek information on this to avoid any unneccessary expenses from an attorney.

thanks,
Emily

It IS a fairly straight-forward process. You aren't going to need to pay a ton of money to the attorney. I have done a step-parent adoption pro-se, and I would recommend that you hire the attorney, even if only on a consultation basis...

 

[ecmst12]

Adoption is a really big deal and if you mess something up it will affect your child's future in a serious way. "Fairly straightforward" is not the same as "so easy a layperson can do it without any problems". The legal expenses should not be nearly as much as they would be if there was a living biological parent, and every penny you pay for it will be worth it in peace of mind of knowing that all your T's are crossed and I's dotted and you won't have any surprises 5 or 10 years down the line.

 

[mistoffolees]

I understand that going through an attorney is the best way but I was told by an attorney at our church that it would be an easy enough process that we could handle ourselves without having to pay for an attorney. As far as divorce goes, that isn't an option for us, and if it were, I would want him to have visitation rights. So I fully understand what would happen if that were to occur. Thanks you all, I will contact the attorney at our church for details.

What are you trying to accomplish?

You have a situation where:
1. Father is deceased. He can't come back and file any claims
2. NC recognized de facto parent status. If anything happens to you, your new husband would have a very strong claim for de facto parent status and custody.

Given those facts, there's very little up side. The only one I can see is attempting to keep Dad's family from making a claim for visitation later, but you can preclude that by simply not letting them see the child while you're alive.

On the other hand, there is a significant down-side to adoption in your case:
1. If you do divorce or separate, you could lose custody (believe me, lots of people say it's not an issue - and then end up divorced later).
2. Your new husband could end up paying child support if you divorce or separate

Seems to me that there's a lot of down side with very little (if any) upside.

So what is it that you're hoping to accomplish? Why are you so eager for adoption - and why does it have to be now rather than waiting until you can afford an attorney to do it right?

 

[nextwife]

and if it were, I would want him to have visitation rights.

And you realize he'd have equal standing for primary custody, and YOU could be the one with visitation rights?

 

[Zigner]

I want to follow up on my prior post. I agree that an attorney should be used. Even though I went successfully navigated through the process pro-se, I would HIGHLY recommend that an attorney be used, even if only to advise on the various steps required.