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Teen Won't Come Home, Dad doesn't have custody.

  • Thread starter Thread starter SCTallgirl
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SCTallgirl

Guest
What is the name of your state? SC
I have sole legal custody of my 15 (almost 16) yr. old son. He visits his Dad alternate weekends. He got mad at me about a month ago because 1. I had him on restriction for poor grades, and I wouldn't let him get his license until he brought me an A/B report card, 2. I wouldn't buy his spring clothes at Abercrombie and Fitch 3. I took his computer away for one week because he had spoken very contemptuously to me when he was mad about the clothing situation.

He went to his Dad's that weekend for his visitation, and he called on Sunday night to say he had decided to live with his Dad. His Dad, who is a Psychologist, by the way, said that he could live with him and his live-in concubine, and he told me that HE would be making all of the decisions about this child now! He said he would NOT discuss this with me, because it was all between my son and me. I told him to send my son home, and he said he couldn't MAKE him do anything that he didn't want to do, because he is almost 16, and he is bigger than his Dad!

The next week, the ex took my son to get his license, even though he did NOT bring home an A/B report card. Plus, he gave him a vehicle, bought him a new cell phone, got him a tanning bed membership and a health club membership, took him off restriciton, and let my son enter my house when I wasn't home and retrieve his computer!!!

My son wants to live over there, because there are no rules or restrictions or chores. We have that over here. I am an excellent disciplinarian (former teacher) and I set clear rules with consequences and rewards.

His Dad's concubine has a teenage son who is moving in with them in a few weeks. My son is in 10th and this boy is in the 11th, and they are best friends. My ex and his concubine work long hours, and I'm retired from the public schools and am a stay-at-home Mom. I do not want my son unsupervised after school, during the summer, and on school holidays while his Dad works three jobs to keep up his high lifestyle. I have always stayed home with my children during the summer.

His Dad still lives in the house where we all lived, and it is a huge house, and I have moved into a small house, and my son doesn't like living in this small house with a small room. I just cannot compete with the material things the ex has offered! But this man doesn't supervise my son, nor does he discipline him.

Since I have full custody, and he is violating the agreement, I am forced to take him to court to get what is already mine!

MY question is....is this case winnable by me? Is the fact that this child is almost 16, and he says he wants to live with hid Dad reason enough for a judge to grant him custody? How can you make a spouse abide by the legal custody agreement? I am desperate.
 


enjay

Member
The judge will take your son's feelings into account, and there's a good chance your ex will receive custody. You won't know, though, until you go back to court.

You should stop referring to your ex's girlfriend as a concubine. It makes you sound bitter.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Yes, you can take him to court for contempt of the order. Whether you prevail will depend on (a) what your son says (at his age, his wishes will likely be taken into consideration) and (b) what sort of proof you have to back up your allegations of no rules, the motivation, etc.

(edit) ditto on the "concubine" tag... It's not going to help you in court one bit. Use g/f, SO, or something similar. Concubine & mistress will bite you.
 

withonel

Member
just an interested observer

Your post sounded sane and reasonable until you threw in 'concubine' at every available opportunity. It casts a really negative view and shows that you bring more to the issue than your son's best interest.
 

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