visitation/warrant

[Hisbabygirl77]

I understand the frustration of not receiving support. I haven't received a penny sinec the day I was divorced and to date my ex is now over $45,000 behind. Have i ever thought about having him arrested? NO WAY! Why? Because when my children are older are they going to say I hate or dont want a relationship with my father because he didnt pay support? No! Are they going to have to deal with issues like not knowing their daddy because he didnt pay support? No! Children love their parents based on attention, time spent with, and because that is their daddy not because of money. There are a few things I want my children to be able to say when the grow up.....
1) That they NEVER heard a bad word spoken about their father from me.
2) That their parents loved them enough to overcome any bitterness towards the other parents to both be involved in their lives in a friendly loving union
3) That their mom always tried to involve their father.
4) That their mom did NOTHING to take their father away from them.

Now when your children grow up do you think they are going to care why you sent daddy to jail? Do you think they will understand that now? Money isnt important to that child but their daddy is. Why would you do that to them? Seems like the priorities are mixed up here. Sure it would be wonderful if their dad paid child support but nothing is more wonderful than seeing my babies faces light up when their daddy gives them a hug, comes around or even just simply calls.

 

[LdiJ]

I understand the frustration of not receiving support. I haven't received a penny sinec the day I was divorced and to date my ex is now over $45,000 behind. Have i ever thought about having him arrested? NO WAY! Why? Because when my children are older are they going to say I hate or dont want a relationship with my father because he didnt pay support? No! Are they going to have to deal with issues like not knowing their daddy because he didnt pay support? No! Children love their parents based on attention, time spent with, and because that is their daddy not because of money. There are a few things I want my children to be able to say when the grow up.....
1) That they NEVER heard a bad word spoken about their father from me.
2) That their parents loved them enough to overcome any bitterness towards the other parents to both be involved in their lives in a friendly loving union
3) That their mom always tried to involve their father.
4) That their mom did NOTHING to take their father away from them.

Now when your children grow up do you think they are going to care why you sent daddy to jail? Do you think they will understand that now? Money isnt important to that child but their daddy is. Why would you do that to them? Seems like the priorities are mixed up here. Sure it would be wonderful if their dad paid child support but nothing is more wonderful than seeing my babies faces light up when their daddy gives them a hug, comes around or even just simply calls.

Its great that your children haven't had to suffer because they have a parent who isn't paying child support. However it doesn't work that way in all families.

Nor is it true that there aren't children who resent their parents for not paying child support. Even if mom keeps it from them they will eventually get to an age where they will figure it out on their own.

Many people (maybe even most) wouldn't pay if there was no pressure to do so.

 

[jslopez711]

This is not the first time that my ex-husband has been taken to court for non-payment. The state is also has a case running at this time. He has not worked for over a year. He also quit his last 3 jobs all good high paying jobs with benefits. He further has not paid any medical bills, Day care or even had a roof to put over the kids head from time to time when they were with him on visitation. He loses water,electric,Phone services for months at a time. His own mom was paying his support to keep him out of jail,She has now even given up on him. Mind you this is a women whom is a episcopal nun and has very little to give, I think her for her efforts on his behalf but its time for this 40 year old man to learn that he is hurting the kids.The Judge had placed these orders on him due to his lack of responsibility. To say im being heart less for for my actions are misunderstood, This is a man that once told me to live on welfare so he could ignore his responsibltys to his kids. The timeing might not be nice, However I need for him to understand his role in the kids life,and keep in mind that the timeing for him to not pay is also not right. As far as our kids missing a christmas with their father there scared of him and don't want to have to stay god knows where.

Holding up my end of the deal
Becky

So you are going to gamble on the well being of the children? To say he will rehabilitate, some how find financial freedom once he gets out of jail is a RISK that you are taking with YOUR children!!!! This is completely under YOUR control. Do the ends justify the means? NO!

 

[BeckySue]

In a format like this it is offen hard to write the total story however in 1999 the same judge sentenced my ex-husband to 3 mo. in jail for the same situation. He came out and remaind faithful to his suport obligations till 2003. This method worked once for a peroid of time. I will also point out he posted a $2000.00 bail in 3 days in 1999. This is the reason the Judge raised the time and bail amount. I am not a bad person here. I have medical problems and do my best to support our kids on a limited income. My current husband has been forced to work 2 jobs and we have had to sell our home and down size. Im not saying that is all my ex-husbands fault, But he needs to help on his own end.
Becky

 

[stealth2]

But he needs to help on his own end.
Becky

No doubt about that. But... really, you couldn't have given it 'til after Christmas? I dunno, I'm big on that "Peace on Earth, Goodwill towards men" thing.

 

[Hisbabygirl77]

I dont know LdiJ I would work two jobs and find other ways to get money. I know that some families feel they need the money but still I couldnt imagine have my kids father thrown in jail because of money. Wouldn't even want to imagine it. And trust me after my divorce there was a few years there were I was gathering pennies to buy diapers and when I would skip meals on end so that the kids would have enough food. I also have two children who have high monthly medical cost and still at no point would it have been an option to do that. I worked my butt off that is for sure but my kids will never know about daddy not paying child support and I will go to sleep soundly at night knowing I have done everything in my power to make sure they always know that both mommy and daddy will do everything we can to make sure they have both of us in their lives WHENEVER they need us.