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Voluntarily relinquishing of parental rights and adoption

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Ohiogal

Queen Bee
You dear sir are a dick. I got on here to ask a question or to not to be bashed.
I gave you LEGALLY ACCURATE information on how you can have your fiancé adopt today. No bashing at all. It was the correct answer to your question if you don't want to wait a few years. Apparently maturity is not your strong suit. Ignorance, however, is.
 


eerelations

Senior Member
Actually you can take that back. Allow your fiancé to adopt your child as a single parent. Then you can also have your rights terminated. When that happens neither you or your ex will be the child's parent but hey you can please your ex like you are so wanting to do. GO FOR IT! Terminate your rights and his and let your fiancé adopt ...

I think we're going a little overboard with the bash-the-OP thing here. OP never said she wanted to terminate parental rights over her child, she said the child's father wanted to. She then said that her fiance is willing to formally adopt the child if that would help facilitate the father-terminating-parental-rights process. She obviously doesn't understand how the law works in this area, but is that a reason to bash her? Isn't this a place for people to come to if they don't understand how the law works?

Why OP's issue merits a total freakout at the OP I cannot understand. (And yes, I do understand everyone's anger at OP's "total dick" response, however, please note that this 'tude didn't appear until after the bashing had started.)

I believe the non-bashing response to OP's issue is "OP, your ex cannot terminate his parental rights to his child because your ex has parental responsibilities to his child. And while his child being adopted will definitely eliminate his parental responsibilities, your fiance cannot adopt the child until he (your fiance) has been happily and steadily married to you for at least a couple of years. Please feel free to advise your ex that after you and your fiance have been happily and steadily married for a couple of years, you and your fiance will initiate the adoption process, and that the adoption process will most definitely include the ex-relinquishing-parental rights process. And be sure to tell your ex that's the only legal way this can be done."
 

eerelations

Senior Member
And yes I know that OP said her ex has been badgering her to get all this done yesterday. The non-bashing response to this would be "This can't be done yesterday. As we've said before, this whole thing will take at least a couple of years. You need to start ignoring your ex's badgering as it carries no weight in law."
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
I think we're going a little overboard with the bash-the-OP thing here. OP never said she wanted to terminate parental rights over her child, she said the child's father wanted to. She then said that her fiance is willing to formally adopt the child if that would help facilitate the father-terminating-parental-rights process. She obviously doesn't understand how the law works in this area, but is that a reason to bash her? Isn't this a place for people to come to if they don't understand how the law works?

Why OP's issue merits a total freakout at the OP I cannot understand. (And yes, I do understand everyone's anger at OP's "total dick" response, however, please note that this 'tude didn't appear until after the bashing had started.)

I believe the non-bashing response to OP's issue is "OP, your ex cannot terminate his parental rights to his child because your ex has parental responsibilities to his child. And while his child being adopted will definitely eliminate his parental responsibilities, your fiance cannot adopt the child until he (your fiance) has been happily and steadily married to you for at least a couple of years. Please feel free to advise your ex that after you and your fiance have been happily and steadily married for a couple of years, you and your fiance will initiate the adoption process, and that the adoption process will most definitely include the ex-relinquishing-parental rights process. And be sure to tell your ex that's the only legal way this can be done."

I didn't bash her. I stated correctly that the ONLY WAY for this to happen now is for her to also relinquish her rights. There was no attitude or anything else directed at the OP but rather I gave her the ONLY legally correct way this could happen now. The fact that OP has the maturity of a three year old is her issue as she doesn't comprehend what was being stated to her. NO ONE actually bashed her. She decided to be a jerk because she didn't like the answer of the ONLY way she could possibly satisfy dad's wish to have it done yesterday.

Oh and should I check with you before I post to make sure it conforms with your beliefs of how to respond?
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
And yes I know that OP said her ex has been badgering her to get all this done yesterday. The non-bashing response to this would be "This can't be done yesterday. As we've said before, this whole thing will take at least a couple of years. You need to start ignoring your ex's badgering as it carries no weight in law."

Okay everyone -- run your responses by eerelations before you post to make sure ee approves and it won't be read the wrong way! Again, NO ONE BASHED HER.
 

eerelations

Senior Member
OP said this:

"My daughter's father wants to voluntarily terminate parental rights and my fiancé is willing to adopt her. I will be married in June 2017. Im in Wyoming im the biological mother of the child and i dont know where to start or how to start. Any advice is much appreciated."

And then this:

"The father wants it done yesterday. He keeps badgering me about why i haven't gotten it done yet. Now what?"

You responded with this:

"YOU CANNOT DO IT. End of story. There is a little thing called the law."

And then this:

"Actually you can take that back. Allow your fiancé to adopt your child as a single parent. Then you can also have your rights terminated. When that happens neither you or your ex will be the child's parent but hey you can please your ex like you are so wanting to do. GO FOR IT! Terminate your rights and his and let your fiancé adopt ..."

Looks pretty bashy to me.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
OP said this:

"My daughter's father wants to voluntarily terminate parental rights and my fiancé is willing to adopt her. I will be married in June 2017. Im in Wyoming im the biological mother of the child and i dont know where to start or how to start. Any advice is much appreciated."

And then this:

"The father wants it done yesterday. He keeps badgering me about why i haven't gotten it done yet. Now what?"

You responded with this:

"YOU CANNOT DO IT. End of story. There is a little thing called the law."

And then this:

"Actually you can take that back. Allow your fiancé to adopt your child as a single parent. Then you can also have your rights terminated. When that happens neither you or your ex will be the child's parent but hey you can please your ex like you are so wanting to do. GO FOR IT! Terminate your rights and his and let your fiancé adopt ..."

Looks pretty bashy to me.
Nope. Not bashy. That is the one it could happen. And it should have said "Actually I can take that back". Because there is two ways.
 

not2cleverRed

Obvious Observer
OP said this:

"My daughter's father wants to voluntarily terminate parental rights and my fiancé is willing to adopt her. I will be married in June 2017. Im in Wyoming im the biological mother of the child and i dont know where to start or how to start. Any advice is much appreciated."

And then this:

"The father wants it done yesterday. He keeps badgering me about why i haven't gotten it done yet. Now what?"

You responded with this:

"YOU CANNOT DO IT. End of story. There is a little thing called the law."

And then this:

"Actually you can take that back. Allow your fiancé to adopt your child as a single parent. Then you can also have your rights terminated. When that happens neither you or your ex will be the child's parent but hey you can please your ex like you are so wanting to do. GO FOR IT! Terminate your rights and his and let your fiancé adopt ..."

Looks pretty bashy to me.

It is apparent that OP felt that it was pretty bashy.

The appropriate advice for OP would be, "Tell Dad to pound sand. Until you are married, you cannot have a step-parent adoption. Furthermore, it is not good to rush into a step-parent adoption - wait until you are married for a couple of years before doing that, and even then, retain a lawyer. Dad can stomp his feet and declare how unfair it is that he has to pay child support because he never intended on having a child with you, but that doesn't mean anyone has to listen."
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
It is apparent that OP felt that it was pretty bashy.

The appropriate advice for OP would be, "Tell Dad to pound sand. Until you are married, you cannot have a step-parent adoption. Furthermore, it is not good to rush into a step-parent adoption - wait until you are married for a couple of years before doing that, and even then, retain a lawyer. Dad can stomp his feet and declare how unfair it is that he has to pay child support because he never intended on having a child with you, but that doesn't mean anyone has to listen."

So we should also run all responses by you? What if you and ee disagree? Whose word prevails? I told her BOTH ways directly. Neither was bashy though she acted like a toddler in responding.
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Denying it is so lame when it’s so obvious. I never have understood why you always have the guts to do it but you never have the guts to own it.

Oh well, carry on.

I own what I say. I am not denying what I said. But it wasn't bashing .. didn't bash her at all until she acted like a toddler with an internet link.
 

CTU

Meddlesome Priestess
Post #11 was excellent and accurate advice.

(It wasn't the only one, but I'm channeling my inner SJ)
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
Post #11 was excellent and accurate advice.

(It wasn't the only one, but I'm channeling my inner SJ)

*snicker* True. But you didn't run it past the others, did you? Oh I agree with you. SO, you must be bashing as well.
 

CTU

Meddlesome Priestess
*snicker* True. But you didn't run it past the others, did you? Oh I agree with you. SO, you must be bashing as well.

Well, I do moonlight as Jack Bauer sooooo ... :D

Okay I couldn't fit that into a "bashing" context at all no matter how hard I tried. I give up lol
 

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