What age can child be left alone at home?

[Pearl72]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Colorado

I was just informed by my daughter, who is 9 - that her father leaves her home alone after school for 2 hours, then home alone again when her dad, sister, step mom and nephew go to tae kwan do at night for 2 hours as well. My daughter is too scared to talk to her father about it, and she hates being left home alone for so long. She gets scared. Am i being out of my parenting bounds to bring this up to him? I already know he will get on the defensive, and then get after our daughter for saying anything to me about it. They go almost every day of the week. If i lived closer, i would suggest she come stay with me during that time they are gone - but that isn't an option right now.

 

[CourtClerk]

There is no legal age for a child to be left at home alone in Colorado. At 9, she should be fine.

Reassure her of the rules. Don't answer the phone unless it's dad, don't answer the door. Call 911 if the house catches fire, etc.

 

[LdiJ]

There is no legal age for a child to be left at home alone in Colorado. At 9, she should be fine.

Reassure her of the rules. Don't answer the phone unless it's dad, don't answer the door. Call 911 if the house catches fire, etc.

I wouldn't personally leave a 9 year old home alone for that long.

 

[CourtClerk]

I wouldn't personally leave a 9 year old home alone for that long.

Well that's you. I was left at home at that age for a lot longer than 120 minutes. Wonder of all wonders, we all survived.

 

[CJane]

At 9, for 2 hours... it's unlikely that child services would have anything to do with that particular case. They might investigate, make sure she knows what to do in case of emergency, etc, but it wouldn't be seen as neglect or anything else.

The best thing you can do is encourage your daughter to see this as a positive thing - time alone to just be herself. Take a long bath, read a book, etc.

I thought kiddo was participating in Martial Arts as well. What happened to that?

When is your final hearing?

 

[majomom1]

At 9, for 2 hours... it's unlikely that child services would have anything to do with that particular case. They might investigate, make sure she knows what to do in case of emergency, etc, but it wouldn't be seen as neglect or anything else.

The best thing you can do is encourage your daughter to see this as a positive thing - time alone to just be herself. Take a long bath, read a book, etc.

I thought kiddo was participating in Martial Arts as well. What happened to that?

When is your final hearing?

After school is not a big deal, but I too wondered about the martial arts... If she is uncomfortable alone, then tell her to go with the others. Surely she has the choice.

 

[CJane]

After school is not a big deal, but I too wondered about the martial arts... If she is uncomfortable alone, then tell her to go with the others. Surely she has the choice.

Well, in Pearl's previous threads, part of the issue has been that Dad has kiddo involved in martial arts. NOW, she appears to not be involved. So I wonder what happened.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

At 9, for 2 hours... it's unlikely that child services would have anything to do with that particular case. They might investigate, make sure she knows what to do in case of emergency, etc, but it wouldn't be seen as neglect or anything else.

The best thing you can do is encourage your daughter to see this as a positive thing - time alone to just be herself. Take a long bath, read a book, etc.

I thought kiddo was participating in Martial Arts as well. What happened to that?

When is your final hearing?

I usually agree with your advice, but re the bolded, I'm not sure I would be ok with a 9 year old taking a long back in an empty house. Just me. Read a book, watch tv... but def not taking a long bath.

 

[CJane]

I usually agree with your advice, but re the bolded, I'm not sure I would be ok with a 9 year old taking a long back in an empty house. Just me. Read a book, watch tv... but def not taking a long bath.

Weird.

But the bath itself isn't the point. I personally HATE baths and wouldn't take one if you paid me. DO NOT GET why people want to sit around and soak in their own funk. But that's me.

The point was, that I get that kiddo is uncomfortable being alone for extended periods, but when the house is usually full of people, that time alone could definitely be positive.

 

[Artemis_ofthe_Hunt]

Weird.

But the bath itself isn't the point. I personally HATE baths and wouldn't take one if you paid me. DO NOT GET why people want to sit around and soak in their own funk. But that's me.

The point was, that I get that kiddo is uncomfortable being alone for extended periods, but when the house is usually full of people, that time alone could definitely be positive.

I don't like baths much either, but that's because I am a taller person and even in the larger baths, all I get is either my legs or my body with my legs out of the water. Not comfortable, AT ALL.

Time alone can be a whole lot of other things though, not taking a bath where if she falls asleep, she could drown.

 

[RRevak]

Weird.

But the bath itself isn't the point. I personally HATE baths and wouldn't take one if you paid me. DO NOT GET why people want to sit around and soak in their own funk. But that's me.

The point was, that I get that kiddo is uncomfortable being alone for extended periods, but when the house is usually full of people, that time alone could definitely be positive.

See I love baths, a lot, but I too agree with the ick of sitting in my own funk. I save myself this fate by taking a shower first THEN enjoying my long soak. Yes, I love baths that much

<end momentary thread hijack>

 

[Pearl72]

As far as I knew she was still going when she is with her dad, but no longer goes when it is on my parenting time, due to daughter's Father telling my daughter that she won't advance now because her class time interferes with her time with me when i have her.

I have assured her that she can call me at ANY time to talk if she gets lonely or scared.

Just wondering if i would be interfering, or be considered interfering if i discussed the issue with her dad - or if i should just leave it alone. It is a shame my daughter is scared to talk to her dad anymore, for fear of what he will say or do.

 

[CourtClerk]

You can have the conversation but done expect him to respond, because quite honestly I wouldn't respond either. It's not hurting her to be at home for a couple of hours and all you're going to do is cause tension. For what? Something you can't control or change anyway? What's the point

 

[RRevak]

I have assured her that she can call me at ANY time to talk if she gets lonely or scared.

That might be a helpful way for the both of you to handle the situation. If you're available to answer your phone, why dont you two agree on a couple set times in which she calls you while she's alone. That way she gets to talk to someone when she feels scared and you get the reassurance that she's ok. Might be easier than convincing dad to change the situation.

 

[Pearl72]

Thats what i kinda figured. I don't need or want the contention, i get enough of that already with him and his wife.

CJane - According to my lawyer, we arn't having a final hearing, the GAL we had has moved on to another position, so we have a NEW GAL appointed to us, and so He has to talk to my daughter, Dad, Me etc all over again. At the beginning of Dec 2010 we (both me and daughter's father) had to respond to the prior GAL's recommendations, and at that time the GAL had asked the matter be set for a court hearing by Dec 30th - which never happened. According to my lawyer, he didn't contest per say what the GAL had stated, but rather wrote a 17 page of what he wanted, and didn't want - and asked the judge to consider a lot of things that we never even discussed -so my lawyer said due to that, and now having a GAL, we won't be going to court, rather the new GAL has to get his information - and then go from there? So because of this, I now have every weekend again, no holidays until the GAL comes up with his report and talks to the judge, from what i understand.