what am I entitled to

[ANGIEB68]

What is the name of your state? Va

I've been married 10 years and now my husband has moved out and in with his girlfriend. Most of the marriage I did not work and now he doesn't want to provide me with anything. My question is, what are my rights and what am I entitled to in refernce to spousal support and retirement benefits/profit sharing?

 

[kat1963]

Howdy from Chesapeake. Get a good lawyer, I have the name of a very good female attorney out of Norfolk if you wish to e-mail me. She was able to get DH's ex now husband on adultry (w/the ex. hahaha), so the ex's husband ex now has lifetime alimony (it was in a temporary seperation order that became perm.). Courts here are backed up, it will take months to get to court. Best thing to do is to find a job and make out the best you can. Are there children involved?
KAT

 

[ANGIEB68]

Hey Kat,
I have a court date already. I just can't afford an attorney right now. I lost my job in Sept from the stress os this situation. We have been court ordered to go to mediation. I just need to know what my rights are and what I'm entitled to so that I can negotiate in mediation. We do no have children, thank God. I don't think he was having an affair while we sere together but he didn't waste any time moving in with someone.

 

[kat1963]

Thank heavens for that, at least you don't have to worry about STD's. I’m sure there are other mitigating factors involved (do a search for clarification), so of course you’ll have to use your own judgment in hopefully coming to a peaceful & quick settlement. I have to tell you however, from what I’ve researched only 1 out of every 6 divorces actually ends in spousal support award. You could get a judge that doesn’t believe in support beyond the divorce if both parties are capable of working, so your best bet would be to settle out of court if possible. On average 1-3 years but now more then 5 years of spousal support is considered rehabilitative (since 1998 in VA for short term marriages, fewer than 20 years) for you to get back on your feet, go back to college or what have you. Of course you can always ask for a lump sum payment if you prefer (and if he can afford it). You would also be entitled to portion of his 401K and an equitable distribution of the marital property. When do you go to medication? Any idea of what he’s going to offer?
KAT

 

[ANGIEB68]

We go to meditation on Tuesday. I have no idea what he will offer. He may want to go back to the original agreement we had but now that I know he lives with someone the orignal agreement is not sufficient. We may end up battling it out in court becasue he doesn't want to give me anything. Doesn't matter to me becasue what's the worst that could happen?...I don't get anything in which I'm not getting now.