CP planning move to another state

[Mike703]

What is the name of your state? Tennessee

I live in Virginia but CP, child, and husband live in Tennessee (where our visitation and parenting agreement was set). CP was granted full custody. It came to my attention that CP is planning move to Indiana as early as December. This others me as it is a much further distance for me to travel (currently a 9 hour drive to Tennessee). Would be much more expensive to me to travel as driving may no longer become an option. I'm sure threads like this have been posted many times, but my situation is a little different as I have never been a Tennessee resident.

I would like to find out how I can protest move until we can work out a compromise that would be in the best interest of everybody, not just CP and husband. Is it as simple as sending a certified letter to the courts and CP regarding move?? I do not have a problem with them moving to Indiana as long as it is for the purpose of bettering themselves, but I do not want to have to continue to bear 100% of the financial burden of travel (I travel 500+ miles, while CP litterally drives down the street) especially when we are talking about adding an addition 200-300 miles. I also am unsure as to what to expect if move to Indiana is complete. Do we need to establish parental agreement and visitation for Indiana?? Also, it is possible for CP and NCP to establish a meeting place out of state (ex. Ohio) for visitation?? I do not want to wait on a notice from CP as I may not recieve it, would prefer to act on this ASAP in order to make sure things are done properly. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

 

[Silverplum]

What is the name of your state? Tennessee

I live in Virginia but CP, child, and husband live in Tennessee (where our visitation and parenting agreement was set). CP was granted full custody. It came to my attention that CP is planning move to Indiana as early as December. This others me as it is a much further distance for me to travel (currently a 9 hour drive to Tennessee). Would be much more expensive to me to travel as driving may no longer become an option. I'm sure threads like this have been posted many times, but my situation is a little different as I have never been a Tennessee resident.

I would like to find out how I can protest move until we can work out a compromise that would be in the best interest of everybody, not just CP and husband. Is it as simple as sending a certified letter to the courts and CP regarding move?? I do not have a problem with them moving to Indiana as long as it is for the purpose of bettering themselves, but I do not want to have to continue to bear 100% of the financial burden of travel (I travel 500+ miles, while CP litterally drives down the street) especially when we are talking about adding an addition 200-300 miles. I also am unsure as to what to expect if move to Indiana is complete. Do we need to establish parental agreement and visitation for Indiana?? Also, it is possible for CP and NCP to establish a meeting place out of state (ex. Ohio) for visitation?? I do not want to wait on a notice from CP as I may not recieve it, would prefer to act on this ASAP in order to make sure things are done properly. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

You might be able to work out something regarding transportation, but you cannot block their move -- you don't live nearby and participate regularly in your child's life, and a move would not change that for the worse.

 

[Mike703]

You don't live nearby and participate regularly in your child's life, and a move would not change that for the worse.

That is an assumption and not fact. Even though I am a distance away, I have taken every opportunity to spend time with my daughter to the fullest, not to mention my immediate and extended family and also involved in her extra curricular activities (when made aware of them). I have done everything that has been required of me and then some. So if you could, I kindly ask you to please rephrase that statement...

 

[majomom1]

Original post by: Mike703
What is the name of your state? Tennessee

I live in Virginia but CP, child, and husband live in Tennessee (where our visitation and parenting agreement was set). CP was granted full custody. It came to my attention that CP is planning move to Indiana as early as December. This others me as it is a much further distance for me to travel (currently a 9 hour drive to Tennessee). Would be much more expensive to me to travel as driving may no longer become an option. I'm sure threads like this have been posted many times, but my situation is a little different as I have never been a Tennessee resident.

I would like to find out how I can protest move until we can work out a compromise that would be in the best interest of everybody, not just CP and husband. Is it as simple as sending a certified letter to the courts and CP regarding move?? I do not have a problem with them moving to Indiana as long as it is for the purpose of bettering themselves, but I do not want to have to continue to bear 100% of the financial burden of travel (I travel 500+ miles, while CP litterally drives down the street) especially when we are talking about adding an addition 200-300 miles. I also am unsure as to what to expect if move to Indiana is complete. Do we need to establish parental agreement and visitation for Indiana?? Also, it is possible for CP and NCP to establish a meeting place out of state (ex. Ohio) for visitation?? I do not want to wait on a notice from CP as I may not recieve it, would prefer to act on this ASAP in order to make sure things are done properly. Any help would be greatly appreciated!

If you have never been a resident of Tennessee, how did your order end up in TN? and you pay 100% of the travel?

Typically the one who moves has the burden of travel expense, unless the parties agree to share. Since she is now moving, you should be able to get 1/2 of at least the difference.

How do you know she is moving? If the source is reliable, you could hire and an attorney to file a motion to modify the parenting plan, with her pending move as the reason. I would think that would be fairly easy to do even from VA... but make sure your info is reliable...

 

[Silverplum]

If you have never been a resident of Tennessee, how did your order end up in TN? and you pay 100% of the travel?

Pretty easy.

Typically the one who moves has the burden of travel expense, unless the parties agree to share. Since she is now moving, you should be able to get 1/2 of at least the difference.

Maaaybe. Maybe not.

How do you know she is moving?

Probably from the child.

If the source is reliable, you could hire and an attorney to file a motion to modify the parenting plan, with her pending move as the reason. I would think that would be fairly easy to do even from VA... but make sure your info is reliable...

That's reasonable. But he's going to have jurisdictional issues to work out first.

 

[Mike703]

If you have never been a resident of Tennessee, how did your order end up in TN? and you pay 100% of the travel?

Typically the one who moves has the burden of travel expense, unless the parties agree to share. Since she is now moving, you should be able to get 1/2 of at least the difference.

How do you know she is moving? If the source is reliable, you could hire and an attorney to file a motion to modify the parenting plan, with her pending move as the reason. I would think that would be fairly easy to do even from VA... but make sure your info is reliable...

Very long story (partly my fault) but to make it short, VA courts did not rule in her favor (I was awarded full custody) so she fled to Tennessee with our child and filed there (I should have filed kidnapping charges but did not and waited too long thinking that the VA order would hold up). We went to court in rural Tennessee and, needless to say, I did not get a fair trial. I was too ignorant of the legal system back then to have any idea as to what I should or should be doing. The lawyer I had in Tennessee was not much help either as she could have motioned to throw the case out on multiple occasions but chose to tell me one thing, then do nothing when it was time to go to court. Was a very disturbing experience.

 

[majomom1]

Mike703 Quote:

Very long story (partly my fault) but to make it short, VA courts did not rule in her favor (I was awarded full custody) so she fled to Tennessee with our child and filed there (I should have filed kidnapping charges but did not and waited too long thinking that the VA order would hold up). We went to court in rural Tennessee and, needless to say, I did not get a fair trial. I was too ignorant of the legal system back then to have any idea as to what I should or should be doing. The lawyer I had in Tennessee was not much help either as she could have motioned to throw the case out on multiple occasions but chose to tell me one thing, then do nothing when it was time to go to court. Was a very disturbing experience.

Yeah... many of us have gotten bad advice. You probably cannot block her move, but you should be able to get at least some of the travel expenses shared. Look up the TN laws on modifying and relocation... that should give you some guidelines on what you can expect.

I would think this could be done fairly easy and not much an attorney can flub up here, especially if you know the rules and laws up front.

Good luck.

 

[lwpat]

I suggest you ask straight out about the move and then try to work something out between you. Put it in writing and get the court to approve.

 

[LdiJ]

That is an assumption and not fact. Even though I am a distance away, I have taken every opportunity to spend time with my daughter to the fullest, not to mention my immediate and extended family and also involved in her extra curricular activities (when made aware of them). I have done everything that has been required of me and then some. So if you could, I kindly ask you to please rephrase that statement...

You misunderstood....you are nine hours away from the child, therefore you are on a long distance schedule. You are unable to be involved in the child's daily life because you are 9 hours away. The fact that your extended family may be in the current area is irrelevant.

Whether mom stays put, or moves to Indiana, or even moves to California you will still be on a long distance schedule. Therefore there is nothing you can do to stop mom's move...your only valid issue is who is responsible for transportation....and how that transportation will be achieved.

 

[lwpat]

No way the Tenn court had jurisdiction. Very bad attorney since the VA order had precedence.

 

[Silverplum]

You misunderstood....you are nine hours away from the child, therefore you are on a long distance schedule. You are unable to be involved in the child's daily life because you are 9 hours away. The fact that your extended family may be in the current area is irrelevant.

Whether mom stays put, or moves to Indiana, or even moves to California you will still be on a long distance schedule. Therefore there is nothing you can do to stop mom's move...your only valid issue is who is responsible for transportation....and how that transportation will be achieved.

Huh. And to think...*I* was right all along.

 

[LdiJ]

No way the Tenn court had jurisdiction. Very bad attorney since the VA order had precedence.

There is no basis to assume that. All we know is that at one point she and the child were in VA...we don't know when or how long.

 

[luckymom]

Whether mom stays put, or moves to Indiana, or even moves to California you will still be on a long distance schedule. Therefore there is nothing you can do to stop mom's move...your only valid issue is who is responsible for transportation....and how that transportation will be achieved.

Is this always the case? My move from Texas to Illinois was allowed, but later ex was successful in getting a TX judge to order that my residence was limited to a particular city in Illinois.

 

[Mike703]

Really starting to wonder how many of you know what you are talking about, cause from what i've seen and heard in the past, there are certain factors as far as why a move would be allowed. In the end it is about being able to maintain the same level of relationship after the move that there was before the move. I question that this can be accomplished given the CP's track record (has historically not been very accomodating). Another valid point is that CP is moving so that husband can find better work, not necessarily for her or our daughter's own benefit. None of you have even thought of these factors, you all just see that i'm from a different state and automatically assume that I was never a part of this child's life. If you all had read the original thread, I stated that I did not have an issue with them moving, my main concern is maintaining the relationship with my daughter that I have now.

 

[Mike703]

You misunderstood....you are nine hours away from the child, therefore you are on a long distance schedule. You are unable to be involved in the child's daily life because you are 9 hours away. The fact that your extended family may be in the current area is irrelevant.

Whether mom stays put, or moves to Indiana, or even moves to California you will still be on a long distance schedule. Therefore there is nothing you can do to stop mom's move...your only valid issue is who is responsible for transportation....and how that transportation will be achieved.

I think you are not fully understanding, first off, extended family is not in the area which is one thing (I agree, could be viewed as irrelevant)...but CP can not simply move as far away from NCP as possible just to do it as it could be detrimental to relationship between child and NCP. There must be a valid factor as far as improving the child's life (husband looking for a better job is irrelevant as well, since he is not legally obligated to care for child).