Altering transportation.

[Chelle0511]

What is the name of your state? Illinois
New question, just like to be informed I suppose.
What is everyone's experience with trasportation. Divorse agreement says that father provides transportation due to mother not having any. Now she does have reliable transportaion, and not to mention the times that we have drove and hour and 15 minutes to pick up the child for visitation and she is not there. Think that a judge would alter the agreement to her having to meet half way or make the trip to drop off or pick up?

 

[Chelle0511]

Needing a response!

A response....anybody?????

 

[gatorguy3]

Re: Altering Transportation

It depends entirely upon the judge.

Many will ask that the parties meet half way.

I am in Florida. My ex lives about 130 miles from me. Because of traffic and the cities I have to drive through, the drive takes me between 2 and 3 hours one way. So, every other weekend, on Friday I drive close to 6 hours and then I do the same on Sunday when I return my son.

Truth of the matter is I have no transportation and have not for the past 3 months or so. My engine blew on my truck and I have no means to fix it. I have had to rely on friends and borrow money to rent cars when friends cannot take me.

But, to answer you...because of a circumstance change, the judge might rule in favor of meeting half way.

 

[casa]

What is the name of your state? Illinois
New question, just like to be informed I suppose.
What is everyone's experience with trasportation. Divorse agreement says that father provides transportation due to mother not having any. Now she does have reliable transportaion, and not to mention the times that we have drove and hour and 15 minutes to pick up the child for visitation and she is not there. Think that a judge would alter the agreement to her having to meet half way or make the trip to drop off or pick up?

Depends on many things. First, an hour and 15 min. isn't a terribly long drive to pick up a child for visitation. Also the husband agreed to being responsible for transportation- obviously he knew the mother wouldn't always have no transportation. It's hard to change court orders, there will have to be valid or compelling reasons- and the fact that Dad no longer wants to be bothered by what he previously agreed to, isn't one of them.

I think your best bet is ask the Mom if she's willing to meet 1/2 way.

 

[Chelle0511]

It depends entirely upon the judge.

Many will ask that the parties meet half way.

I am in Florida. My ex lives about 130 miles from me. Because of traffic and the cities I have to drive through, the drive takes me between 2 and 3 hours one way. So, every other weekend, on Friday I drive close to 6 hours and then I do the same on Sunday when I return my son.

Truth of the matter is I have no transportation and have not for the past 3 months or so. My engine blew on my truck and I have no means to fix it. I have had to rely on friends and borrow money to rent cars when friends cannot take me.

But, to answer you...because of a circumstance change, the judge might rule in favor of meeting half way.

So why don't you go to court and half her meet you half way or make the drive to drop off or pick up?

 

[Chelle0511]

Depends on many things. First, an hour and 15 min. isn't a terribly long drive to pick up a child for visitation. Also the husband agreed to being responsible for transportation- obviously he knew the mother wouldn't always have no transportation. It's hard to change court orders, there will have to be valid or compelling reasons- and the fact that Dad no longer wants to be bothered by what he previously agreed to, isn't one of them.

I think your best bet is ask the Mom if she's willing to meet 1/2 way.

Yes, the father did agree due to the circumstances (that the mother did not have trandportation).

As for a valid and compelling reason, what about the fact that half the time the father makes the drives just to find that the mother is not home or denies him the right to see his child.

 

[gatorguy3]

Re: Altering Transportation

Those things will come in to play Chelle and will be considered in the final judgement of the court.

I don't ask for meeting half way in my situation because I have no money or other means to do anything.

Hell, the court just recommended 179 days in jail and have already suspended my license.

My situation is complicated. I do not trust my ex to do wisely with money I give her, although I do give her money here and there. I provide for my son when he is with me. I get him clothes and necessary other things.

My ex has 2 other children from a previous relationship and doesn't go after the other father for support....with the help of the Department of Revenue and the State of Florida she is coming after me with all guns.

 

[casa]

Those things will come in to play Chelle and will be considered in the final judgement of the court.

I don't ask for meeting half way in my situation because I have no money or other means to do anything.

Hell, the court just recommended 179 days in jail and have already suspended my license.

My situation is complicated. I do not trust my ex to do wisely with money I give her, although I do give her money here and there. I provide for my son when he is with me. I get him clothes and necessary other things.

My ex has 2 other children from a previous relationship and doesn't go after the other father for support....with the help of the Department of Revenue and the State of Florida she is coming after me with all guns.

That's because a child needs to be fed more than just "here and there" and a child needs roof over their head more than just "here and there", heated water, electricity~ You are not paying child support and that is why you are in the trouble you are in. You can't care for a child "here and there" and buy clothes sometimes and think that's enough.
The issue with the mother's other 2 children is none of your business- Whining about their father is no substitute for you doing what you need to do for YOUR child.

 

[casa]

Yes, the father did agree due to the circumstances (that the mother did not have trandportation).

As for a valid and compelling reason, what about the fact that half the time the father makes the drives just to find that the mother is not home or denies him the right to see his child.

He didn't think she wouldn't have transportation for the next 18 years of the child's life did he? Again an hour and 15 min. is not a huge distance to travel.

And the issue of denying visitation is not the same as who is responsible for travel. If she is denying him visitation, then he needs to document it by reporting it to police and making a police report- Then filing in court for contempt. He'll need witness' or documentation that the problem is ongoing.

 

[gatorguy3]

Re: Altering Transportation

Thanks for your expert, or rather non expert opinion, Casa.

I don't conform for many reasons. You don't know the entire situation, nor will you ever.

Don't judge me based on a few paragraphs because you will be wrong with every statement you make. Give your advice, if it matters, and hope it does some people some sort of good. Otherwise, you might be better served doing nothing at all...which is probably what you do for your children anyway.

 

[Chelle0511]

He didn't think she wouldn't have transportation for the next 18 years of the child's life did he? Again an hour and 15 min. is not a huge distance to travel.

And the issue of denying visitation is not the same as who is responsible for travel. If she is denying him visitation, then he needs to document it by reporting it to police and making a police report- Then filing in court for contempt. He'll need witness' or documentation that the problem is ongoing.

Well, if you knew the woman the fact of her not having trasportation for the next 18 years is quite possible. How can one afford transportation when they have no job, and no intentions of getting one.
Thank god for child support and public aide! Never hurts to ask the judge I suppose.

 

[casa]

Thanks for your expert, or rather non expert opinion, Casa.

I don't conform for many reasons. You don't know the entire situation, nor will you ever.

Don't judge me based on a few paragraphs because you will be wrong with every statement you make. Give your advice, if it matters, and hope it does some people some sort of good. Otherwise, you might be better served doing nothing at all...which is probably what you do for your children anyway.

And you enjoy your parenting time in jail Where, you'll have plenty of time to enjoy your non-conformity

 

[gatorguy3]

Re: Altering Transportation

It's all good. My son is a bright child. He is and will continue to get more wise about his mother. Do I want him to resent her? Absolutely not, but he will know her ways. He sees. Money is not everything and he doesn't do without.

That is the major problem/flaw with the system--the people in charge feel "money" is more important than anything, even more important than time with dad. They are seeing the error of their ways, though. And, it is just a matter of time.

 

[casa]

Well, if you knew the woman the fact of her not having trasportation for the next 18 years is quite possible. How can one afford transportation when they have no job, and no intentions of getting one.
Thank god for child support and public aide! Never hurts to ask the judge I suppose.

Your boyfriend can certainly ask a judge whatever he wants. What the judge decides is up to the judge. Your boyfriend's chances are better, though, if he has some legitimate reasons for asking for the change- Because it's something he's already agreed to.
Definately address the issue of denial of visitations- Make sure you are documenting them every time, that will help.

 

[Chelle0511]

Your boyfriend can certainly ask a judge whatever he wants. What the judge decides is up to the judge. Your boyfriend's chances are better, though, if he has some legitimate reasons for asking for the change- Because it's something he's already agreed to.
Definately address the issue of denial of visitations- Make sure you are documenting them every time, that will help.

In your opinion, are my fiance's chances just as good without an attorney?
I just don't see the point in hiring an attorney in the begining if not needed. We gave her the chance and made the drive for 2 years, she screwed up and now she should have to provide transportation as well!