Backpay Support

[unloving father]

What is the name of your state? Illinois


Is it possible to get backpay child support or have a parent provide support to you after the age of 21? The reason I ask is because I just met my real father and went I ask him about why he wasn't there, he has no answer for me and tell there is nothing he can do, and he doesn't want to deal with it.

 

[scoobydu]

I am in washington, with similar circumstances and the same question. My genetic father has been absent my whole life and I have suffered as a result. Can I reasonably bring a civil suit against him even though I am over 21?

 

[nextwife]

Maybe, maybe not. There are many cases in which the mom CHOSE to not even file for support because she did not wish to bring the biofather into the picture. She had a different hubband or BF at the time and WANTED the ex gone and the guy in HER life to be the dad. So she chose to not file because she didn't want the biofather to get tested and have a right to establish any parental riughts or any visitation custody rights. When moms CHOOSE to have a different guy act as the father, or choose to maintain 100% control and never take any legal action to establish paternity, should the person who may never have been told he was the father, or never have been asked to be tested suddenly be made responsible for the mother's failure to act and get a CS order all those years ago?

 

[scoobydu]

Maybe, maybe not. There are many cases in which the mom CHOSE to not even file for support because she did not wish to bring the biofather into the picture. She had a different hubband or BF at the time and WANTED the ex gone and the guy in HER life to be the dad. So she chose to not file because she didn't want the biofather to get tested and have a right to establish any parental riughts or any visitation custody rights. When moms CHOOSE to have a different guy act as the father, or choose to maintain 100% control and never take any legal action to establish paternity, should the person who may never have been told he was the father, or never have been asked to be tested suddenly be made responsible for the mother's failure to act and get a CS order all those years ago?

my state: washington

In my case, I know my biological father has been told repeatedly that he is my father and has always denied it. The first time he was told was when I was three years old, and dshs insisted on a paternity suit when I was eleven. That suit was thrown out for lack of timeliness, and I was only told of this recently.

Maybe my motives for seeking back support arent the most pure, since partly I am angry about not having a father figure while I was growing up. However, I have also been put at a financial disadvantage from growing up in a single parent household, and I want to be brought up to the level where I would be if a responsible father had been present.

In my view, he was informed of his duty early on and he shirked it. Why should I be punished for his shirking?

 

[LdiJ]

my state: washington

In my case, I know my biological father has been told repeatedly that he is my father and has always denied it. The first time he was told was when I was three years old, and dshs insisted on a paternity suit when I was eleven. That suit was thrown out for lack of timeliness, and I was only told of this recently.

Maybe my motives for seeking back support arent the most pure, since partly I am angry about not having a father figure while I was growing up. However, I have also been put at a financial disadvantage from growing up in a single parent household, and I want to be brought up to the level where I would be if a responsible father had been present.

In my view, he was informed of his duty early on and he shirked it. Why should I be punished for his shirking?

Actually, you can't sue at all. Only your mother might be able to sue.

 

[scoobydu]

Actually, you can't sue at all. Only your mother might be able to sue.

I wish she could, but the paternity case she brought against him was dismissed with prejudice for not being brought within a reasonable period of time. I'd be happy if she got some back child support for all the financial strain she went through.

 

[VeronicaGia]

I wish she could, but the paternity case she brought against him was dismissed with prejudice for not being brought within a reasonable period of time. I'd be happy if she got some back child support for all the financial strain she went through.

So you've answered your own question. Paternity has never been established legally, therefore, he is not legally your father.

Time to move on with your life.

 

[kat1963]

Why not sue your mother? It was her responsibility to see that you were financially supported by BOTH parents. Apparently she didn't bother to do much of that on her own. In addition, she (probably) has screwed you out of an inheritance too.
What in the heck makes you think that ANY parent, rich or poor, has the obligation to see that their children are set up for their entire lives? You are an adult now; you have to make your own way. If you chose to live in poverty, you only have yourself to blame.
KAT

 

[nextwife]

Your mother probably had her own reasons when you were young to NOT pursue legal paternity establishment.

WE can't know what they are, but surely she had your best interests in mind at the time. Some moms choose to not establish legal paternity because, for any of a number of reasons, they do NOT wish the legal father to have any custody or visitation rights, and as long as the father is not pushing for them they'd just as soon leave things as they are. Because once paternity IS established, the biofather has every right to ask the court for a legal custody and visitation determination. Sometimes mom is living in a different part of the country and they do not want to have cross-country visitation occuring.

Read the archives and you will see many different stories. Sometimes it is just the relative immaturity of the biofather, or another man in the mother's life when the child is small, or knowledge of the father's substance abuse or abusive nature. Whatever, there is often more to the story. Anyway, I am sure your mom was doing what she thought was best for you at the time!

 

[prettyredhead]

Just seek what you can, albeit answers or what not. Dont blame your mother. I am sure she did the best she could.
She can sue, ask her to. She should be compensated for all those years without money from the fungus called your father.
I wish they would put all people who dont pay child support on an island, sterilize them and whip them from noon to night with wet razor straps. But since that wont happen, then all you can do is try to seek answers. You are entitled to them. Dont stop until you break this man. Break him, and tell him how much it hurt you to not have a father. Make his life miserable.

 

[VeronicaGia]

Hey dingbat, read the posts

Just seek what you can, albeit answers or what not. Dont blame your mother. I am sure she did the best she could.
She can sue, ask her to. She should be compensated for all those years without money from the fungus called your father.
I wish they would put all people who dont pay child support on an island, sterilize them and whip them from noon to night with wet razor straps. But since that wont happen, then all you can do is try to seek answers. You are entitled to them. Dont stop until you break this man. Break him, and tell him how much it hurt you to not have a father. Make his life miserable.

Paternity has never been legally established. In fact, the suit was dismissed WITH PREJUDICE. If you don't know what that means, look it up. Neither the poster nor the posters mother can sue now.

Also, do you think that all stay at home parents should "be put on an island, sterilized and whipped from noon to night with wet razor straps?" After all, they are not financially supporting their kids. Anything less is discrimination.

 

[scoobydu]

Paternity has never been legally established. In fact, the suit was dismissed WITH PREJUDICE. If you don't know what that means, look it up. Neither the poster nor the posters mother can sue now.

Also, do you think that all stay at home parents should "be put on an island, sterilized and whipped from noon to night with wet razor straps?" After all, they are not financially supporting their kids. Anything less is discrimination.

As I understand it, her case being dismissed with prejudice means that she may not bring another paternity suit against him, but that I may.

You appear to be claiming that any personal effort that parents provide for their children, must have no financial value. Did you mean to do so?

 

[VeronicaGia]

As I understand it, her case being dismissed with prejudice means that she may not bring another paternity suit against him, but that I may.

You appear to be claiming that any personal effort that parents provide for their children, must have no financial value. Did you mean to do so?

My post wasn't directed at you, it was directed at prettyredhead. She made a blanket statement and I just wanted to see if she really believed that anyone who didn't financially support their kids should be treated this way. After all, a stay at home parent has no income, therefore, doesn't provide financial support. This is why blanket statements usually don't work.

Now on to your case: Illinois law states that a paternity action cannot be brought up once the child has turned 20 years old. You are 21. Your mother was denied, with prejudice, paternity establishment. The law states that one way or the other, you are now too old to compel a potential father to have a paternity test.

Besides, will money really make you happy? If your mother did a good job raising you, as I'm sure she did, be grateful and let it go.

 

[scoobydu]

Now on to your case: Illinois law states that a paternity action cannot be brought up once the child has turned 20 years old. You are 21. Your mother was denied, with prejudice, paternity establishment. The law states that one way or the other, you are now too old to compel a potential father to have a paternity test.

Besides, will money really make you happy? If your mother did a good job raising you, as I'm sure she did, be grateful and let it go.

Does Washington law read similarly? My conception, birth, residence and alleged father's residence are all artifacts of Washington state, if it makes any difference.

As to money making me happy, it's really beside the point. As I wrote earlier, if mom got the back child support (and spent it on herself, so I never saw a dime) and all I gained was the sure knowledge of my paternal family line, I'd be satisfied and wouldnt consider this a loose end in my life any longer. My question is simply whether either of these or any related (so to speak) objective can reasonably be achieved by legal means. Based on IL law, you say no, and I thank you for your input. If you or anyone has information or advice to the contrary, I would appreciate reading about it.

 

[stealth2]

scoobydu - you really should start your own thread instead of hijacking someone else's. The original poster has a question, and your question in the middle of the thread confuses things - noone knows who's being responded to.