confused about the amount

[opus05]

What is the name of your state? AZ

My husband is in the military and just moved out a few days ago. We have been married for 11 years (he has 14 years in service) and I'm confused as to how much child support my kids are entitled to (we have two).

I've always heard that the soldier pays his BAH for cs and then he would get something called BAH Difference....what is that and how does it work? Does he recieve both BAH and BAH diff?

I have no intention of trying to get him for all he's worth, but I've put my career on hold to raise our kids and help his career, so I'm very scared I won't be able to make ends meet on my own. I am also working on my degree, but without one, what kind of job can I get that will enable my children to live the lifestyle they are use to? Which is not anything grand, but I feel awful that I won't be able to afford the fun stuff. I plan on getting a job and am currently looking, but I don't know if I can pay for rent, utilities, insurance, car payment and whatever else the kids may need on just 700.00 a month (which is what he says I will be gettting.....his BAH is 1040.00 a month)

Any advice would be appreciated.

 

[lisagr33]

opus05- please go to the following website and that should help you. The website is www.dod.mil/militarypay.

 

[VeronicaGia]

What is the name of your state? AZ

My husband is in the military and just moved out a few days ago. We have been married for 11 years (he has 14 years in service) and I'm confused as to how much child support my kids are entitled to (we have two).

I've always heard that the soldier pays his BAH for cs and then he would get something called BAH Difference....what is that and how does it work? Does he recieve both BAH and BAH diff?

I have no intention of trying to get him for all he's worth, but I've put my career on hold to raise our kids and help his career, so I'm very scared I won't be able to make ends meet on my own. I am also working on my degree, but without one, what kind of job can I get that will enable my children to live the lifestyle they are use to? Which is not anything grand, but I feel awful that I won't be able to afford the fun stuff. I plan on getting a job and am currently looking, but I don't know if I can pay for rent, utilities, insurance, car payment and whatever else the kids may need on just 700.00 a month (which is what he says I will be gettting.....his BAH is 1040.00 a month)

Any advice would be appreciated.

He is not solely responsible for the support of those kids. You have a portion of the rent, utilities and food that is all your own, plus your portion for the support of the kids. The kids don't need cars or car insurance, those are yours and solely your responsibility. Keep in mind, he will not only have to help you pay for the kids when they are with you but will have to pay 100% for a home, utilities and food for himself plus the kids while they are with him.

You're going to need to get a job.

 

[opus05]

I never said he was 100% responsible, and I am getting a job, thank you so much for your helpful advice! Which is what I thought this forum was for....advice and not critism.
My question was regarding BAH, do you have any useful info on that topic so that I can get a better understanding of how it works? And, my kids do need me to have a vehicle in order to get back and forth to school everyday because there are no bus systems here. They also have after school activities that I need to take them to. It's bad enought that their parents are divorcing, I don't think I should have to take everything away from them.

 

[betterthanher]

I don't think I should have to take everything away from them.

No, but you will have to cut back on things the entire family used to do because the resources just aren't there anymore. Any child support is to go to the necessities of the children. Anything left over can go to leisure activities, but cs is not to also support those. If you're currently living in a place you alone will not be able to afford, then you'll have to move to more affordable accomodations.

You are now forced to go into the workforce and do your financial part to support the children. No one was criticizing you.

BTW...did you even check out that link you were provided?

 

[opus05]

Yes, I did check out the link. It was very useful, but I still have a few questions that it didn't cover.
I am currently living in base housing (anybody actually in or has been in the military to even know what I'm asking about, because it hasn't sounded like it) which is why I'm looking for an apartment downtown.
Military law's are complety different than civillian ones, which is why it isn't easy to figure out what my children, and myself, are entitled to.

 

[simpleguy05]

Yes, I did check out the link. It was very useful, but I still have a few questions that it didn't cover.
I am currently living in base housing (anybody actually in or has been in the military to even know what I'm asking about, because it hasn't sounded like it) which is why I'm looking for an apartment downtown.
Military law's are complety different than civillian ones, which is why it isn't easy to figure out what my children, and myself, are entitled to.

Ok here goes...you already know that you have to leave base housing. Thats a given. However, he IS NOT collecting BAH until you are out of base housing, and that is a fact. BAH is surrendered once you live in base housing. With that said, I do not believe that you will be entitled to his whole BAH. Right now he is collecting none, and being that you are still married he will be collecting BAH w/ dependents ONLY when you get out of housing. Now once the divorce is complete he will receive BAH w/ differencial. None of this actually matters but for the fact that you need to go to your county courts to establish child support and visitation, or have it written up in your divorce decree. You should be able to get away with just a decree since he's military and won't be able to NOT pay you. His @ss would get fried if he didn't pay. But it is best to go through court to better tell you what you are entitled to if you cannot reach an agreement. As for his BAH once you guys arent together: he will have to bring in his LES if you go to court and they combine BAH, diff., and any addition monies he is making to total his gross income. That compared against the amount of kids you have will give you the correct amount due to you FOR your children. Bottom line: Courts don't care that its called "BAH" thats not a percentage that youre getting. Copurts add it ALL up to compute a figure. Make any sense?

 

[opus05]

Thank You!! And yes, it did make sense. I just wanted to make sure that he could actually afford to pay the cs and whatever expenses he had without it being too finacialy difficult for him.
We were told today that if we divorce and I get the kids, they would lose their military i.d's. But, if we stay married another 3 years, they can keep them. So we decided that he would stay in housing and I would find an apartment off post until school ends in May and I move back to NY. This way, the kids can finish this school year and not have to move five times in three years. As for my vehicle (it's in his name though, so I can't really call it mine) were still working that out.

This is a much harder process than I ever thought it would be.

 

[simpleguy05]

We were told today that if we divorce and I get the kids, they would lose their military i.d's.
Who told you this? There should be NO reason why your kids should lose their I.D.'s

But, if we stay married another 3 years, they can keep them.
I'm dying to know who told you this 3 years thing.

So we decided that he would stay in housing and I would find an apartment off post until school ends in May and I move back to NY.
Just realize that he won't be collecting BAH if he's still in housing,so if he plans to move out soon once the kids are done with school and yall move, you will need to have his pay computed again, since then and only then should it contain BAH.
As for the vehicle, you should reach an agreement to that, and his name on it doesn't mean crap but for the fact that it was a debt incurred in the marriage. It's no more his, than yours. GL


This is a much harder process than I ever thought it would be.[/QUOTE]
Consider yourself lucky that he's military and can easily be tracked and can NEVER get away with not paying support or providing medical ins.

 

[LdiJ]

Thank You!! And yes, it did make sense. I just wanted to make sure that he could actually afford to pay the cs and whatever expenses he had without it being too finacialy difficult for him.
We were told today that if we divorce and I get the kids, they would lose their military i.d's. But, if we stay married another 3 years, they can keep them. So we decided that he would stay in housing and I would find an apartment off post until school ends in May and I move back to NY. This way, the kids can finish this school year and not have to move five times in three years. As for my vehicle (it's in his name though, so I can't really call it mine) were still working that out.

This is a much harder process than I ever thought it would be.

That is completely and totally incorrect. Your children will NOT lose their military IDs due to a divorce if you get the kids. The length of your marriage (or even if you were ever married at all) is completely irrelevant. Children of mililtary personnel get the IDs...period.

 

[simpleguy05]

Something else I left out...You know that military laws and county court laws differ, and ultimately the county court order overrules anything set up thru military court ordered child support, WITH THE EXCEPTION that the military will not allow his CO payments to exceed 1/3 of his pay. Just keep that in mind. And I don't know if you're going for alimony, but like I said if it ALL exceeds 1/3 of his pay then obviously you won't get as much alimony that you may have planned on. And just something to add to your original post about their lifestyle, with sounding like an @sshole. But can you honestly expect yalls lifestyles to stay the same when you're divorcing?

 

[opus05]

Thank you all for your very helpful comments...and in giving them to me without sounding too harsh.

As for the i.d's, I actually got that from a pretty reliable source, but I will check into it. Has anyone here gone through a military divorce lately who would know first hand?

And I know he won't collect BAH while he's still living in quarters, but I'm not asking for cs until May, when we move to NY.....nothing will be done until then, we will just be living apart. Which is a much better situation for the kids, since then they hopefully won't have to hear us fight all the time.

And simpleguy......didn't think you were sounding like an @sshole at all...I appreciated your input. And no, I didn't think our lifestyles would stay the same, I was just hopeing that it wouldn't be a dramatic change for the kids because of what they are already going through. Beggers can't be choosers I suppose!

 

[tankerwife03]

we are active duty also. my cousin just went thru this 2 yrs ago. the kids kept their id card-his ex wife had to give hers up but the kids kept theres. also since you where married over 10 yrs you are entitled to half of his retirement pay if he retires (seems to me he will since he has that long in the military).yes you will have to move out of housing and so will he unless he can prove that he will be keeping the kids there until they are out of school. my cousin pays his ex wife the whole entire amount of this bah- i have seen their court papers and his les- they have 2 children also. and you dont have to worry about going through the state and stuff cause once that order is put in to dfas it automatically gets paid and he can check that on his eom les.just be reassured they wil not lose their id cards until they are age of 18 but up to the age 21 if they are in college.

 

[simpleguy05]

Thank you all for your very helpful comments...and in giving them to me without sounding too harsh.

As for the i.d's, I actually got that from a pretty reliable source, but I will check into it. Has anyone here gone through a military divorce lately who would know first hand?

And I know he won't collect BAH while he's still living in quarters, but I'm not asking for cs until May, when we move to NY.....nothing will be done until then, we will just be living apart. Which is a much better situation for the kids, since then they hopefully won't have to hear us fight all the time.

And simpleguy......didn't think you were sounding like an @sshole at all...I appreciated your input. And no, I didn't think our lifestyles would stay the same, I was just hopeing that it wouldn't be a dramatic change for the kids because of what they are already going through. Beggers can't be choosers I suppose!

My divorce was a military divorce so I know what I'm talking about. And tankerswife was correct, technically. What I mean by that is he won't have to leave base housing unless somebody "tells on him" and Tanker needs to check the CO'd amount because I bet its not more than 1/3 of his pay thats he's paying. She's right, but it varies, and the 1/3 thing is truth.

 

[curiousdad1]

My wife and I are both military. If you divorce your husband the children will maintain thier miltiary Id cards and you will lose yours. The children will always be considered his dependents and are entilted to the military benefits such as medical and other benefits that come with being a military dependent. His child support will be determined by the civilian laws and it is 1/3 of what ever he makes max. The child support will automatically come out of his miltiary pay so you will always get your support. However you will have to move off base and find yourself a place. It will have to be something that YOU can afford as you are equally responsible for taking care of the children just as he is.