Does mental illness affect custody?

[triviafreakdad]

What is the name of your state?NY
My wife has been diagnosed with clinical depression , takes 2 different anti-depressents , drinks alcohol even though it says on her medication not to , smokes marijuana , doesn't follow her doctor's advice for therapy and was committed to a mental health facility earlier this year ( in Jan.) . Will this matter to the court ?

 

[seniorjudge]

What is the name of your state?NY
My wife has been diagnosed with clinical depression , takes 2 different anti-depressents , drinks alcohol even though it says on her medication not to , smokes marijuana , doesn't follow her doctor's advice for therapy and was committed to a mental health facility earlier this year ( in Jan.) . Will this matter to the court ?

Q: Will this matter to the court ?

A: Let's hope so; she doesn't need kids around.

 

[rmet4nzkx]

What is the name of your state?NY
My wife has been diagnosed with clinical depression , takes 2 different anti-depressents , drinks alcohol even though it says on her medication not to , smokes marijuana , doesn't follow her doctor's advice for therapy and was committed to a mental health facility earlier this year ( in Jan.) . Will this matter to the court ?

That is not all that will be considered, they will also consider all the other relaitonships and children, right now she has temp cusody of you child together and a TRO against you for disorderly conduct, don't forget your loss of employment. If your child together is only 3 yo is it possible that she had PPD?

 

[triviafreakdad]

No post-partum , she was finally diagnosed after the birth of our son , she had never had health insurance until then . And my lay off is just temporary , construction work is spotty in upstate NY when winter starts , I should be back to work in a month or so , I've had lay-offs in each of the last 3 years . A little family history , her mom suffers from depression and her brother is bipolar . I've talked to her brother about my wife and he has told me that he's uncomfortable around his sister because she reminds him of what he was like before he started taking medication .

 

[brisgirl825]

No post-partum , she was finally diagnosed after the birth of our son , she had never had health insurance until then . And my lay off is just temporary , construction work is spotty in upstate NY when winter starts , I should be back to work in a month or so , I've had lay-offs in each of the last 3 years . A little family history , her mom suffers from depression and her brother is bipolar . I've talked to her brother about my wife and he has told me that he's uncomfortable around his sister because she reminds him of what he was like before he started taking medication .

And yet you still had kids with her...

You are no different than the ladies that come in here saying that they now realize that their ex is a deadbeat, druggie, abuser, etc. and they want custody. If she is not a danger to the kids, you have an uphill battle. She has the child/ren in her custody and obviously has been managing.
You need to look at statistics of how many people in this country have mental illness, esp. depression and lead normal lives including being able to parent children. This is an illness that effects many people and can be manged with proper therapy and drugs.

I think you'll need to do better to prove mom unfit.

 

[triviafreakdad]

Pardon me , she has had our son in her custody for about 3 weeks , she is living in a 1 bedroom apartment with her mom , daughter and our child and he has been spending equal time with each of us . As I said , she was diagnosed AFTER the birth of our son , yeah I knew she had some problems , but have you EVER lived with a person with a mental illness ??

 

[brisgirl825]

Pardon me , she has had our son in her custody for about 3 weeks , she is living in a 1 bedroom apartment with her mom , daughter and our child and he has been spending equal time with each of us . As I said , she was diagnosed AFTER the birth of our son , yeah I knew she had some problems , but have you EVER lived with a person with a mental illness ??

Yes, I have. My mother has bipolar disorder. Thanks for trying though.

Her living arrangements are not relevant. When divorce happens, one does what is necessary to survive and often that means living with parents for a time until one can get back on their feet.
She has another child that she takes care of, correct? Or are you now going to make allegations that there is abuse...and you still had a kid with her?

The fact remains that depression, that is being treated, is not something that makes a parent unfit. What has she done, to the child, that makes her unfit?

 

[triviafreakdad]

I understand that her illness can be controlled , read my post , she isn't receiving therapy , the only time she goes to see a doctor is to get a new prescription , she's supposed to go to counselling weekly , she doesn't . Her doctor told her if she used drugs or alcohol that he would commit her again .

 

[triviafreakdad]

By the way , I also have 2 kids from a previous relationship , and I have sole legal custody of them .

 

[brisgirl825]

I understand that her illness can be controlled , read my post , she isn't receiving therapy , the only time she goes to see a doctor is to get a new prescription , she's supposed to go to counselling weekly , she doesn't . Her doctor told her if she used drugs or alcohol that he would commit her again .

Do you hasve proof of her, legal, alcohol consumption? What drugs do you assume she is taking and do you have proof? How are you getting private medical info from her drs? What has she done to the child that makes her unfit?

 

[triviafreakdad]

When we were in court on 12/5 , the judge was definitely concerned about her liiving arrangements , he gave her until our next court date on 1/6 to find suitable housing .

 

[triviafreakdad]

I don't believe courts require anybody to prove whether a parent is unfit anymore , they're supposed to act in the best interest of the child .

 

[triviafreakdad]

A hair follicle test would be proof , wouldn't it ?

 

[brisgirl825]

A hair follicle test would be proof , wouldn't it ?

Judges just don't order drug tests on the testimony of an ex in custody dispute. You how many times people pull that crap in order to get exactly what you are after? You will need to prove that there is a reason for a drug test.

The child's best interests is to have both parents. The 50/50 schedule you have in the best possible scenario.

 

[triviafreakdad]

Unfortunately , she is the one who is insisting that I only have visitation every other weekend with my son . Are you one of those people who think a mother should automatically receive custody of a child ? That fathers are only good for support and alimony ?