Ex wife asking payment

[FarmerJ]

A week later I cant help but wonder if you cannot gain more details such as the activities cost from the school when its at the school and then make a partial payment directly to the school?

 

[Winsome]

A week later I cant help but wonder if you cannot gain more details such as the activities cost from the school when its at the school and then make a partial payment directly to the school?

Like I said, the school costs are controlled costs which are borne by the parent that has primary. To your other point of gaining more details, I wrote in my previous post that I have contacted the providers. The information they gave is different from the figures my ex has given me.

 

[LdiJ]

Like I said, the school costs are controlled costs which are borne by the parent that has primary. To your other point of gaining more details, I wrote in my previous post that I have contacted the providers. The information they gave is different from the figures my ex has given me.

Why the heck won't you just name the school costs? Why do you insist on calling them "fixed costs" and "controlled costs" instead of just saying what she is trying to collect from you?

 

[stealth2]

I replied to my ex asking for full and complete receipts to which she responds 'what is so confusing? I have sent the receipts previously'.

Is she sending you hard copies of the receipts, or via email? If the latter - could they be buried in spam? Accidentally deleted? I've had both occur. If the former - USPS isn't the most reliable these days.

Of the 15 things she listed, she had sent only 3. Of the 3, I spoke with the providers of the activities and they confirmed the amounts which are less than what she quoted

So are you saying she sent bogus receipts?

Regarding these "controlled" school costs, it really would help to have some idea what you're referring to. Thinking back to when mine were younger & in school, the only "regular" expense was lunch, occasional class party, and the odd teacher gift contribution. School supplies/clothes (if they are required to wear uniforms and you get them from school, it would seem fair that you cover the cost of one uniform. JMO), I guess, could be included.

I'm also wondering, based on the one example you gave where the provider said $300 and she said $600. Is it possible that the *total* expense is $600, but your share is $300?

 

[Winsome]

Is she sending you hard copies of the receipts, or via email? If the latter - could they be buried in spam? Accidentally deleted? I've had both occur. If the former - USPS isn't the most reliable these days.

Per court order we use OFW as the means of communication. The OFW software is buggy though. She does not mail hard copies, everything is through email through the family wizard.

So are you saying she sent bogus receipts?

No. She attached only a few, then claims she sent all the receipts previously.

Regarding these "controlled" school costs, it really would help to have some idea what you're referring to.

These are device rental fees, text book rentals.

I'm also wondering, based on the one example you gave where the provider said $300 and she said $600. Is it possible that the *total* expense is $600, but your share is $300?

Possible. But there is no way to verify without a receipt.

 

[LdiJ]

Per court order we use OFW as the means of communication. The OFW software is buggy though. She does not mail hard copies, everything is through email through the family wizard.


No. She attached only a few, then claims she sent all the receipts previously.


These are device rental fees, text book rentals.


Possible. But there is no way to verify without a receipt.

Then I think that it is not unreasonable to ask you to share in those once a year or once a semester costs.

For those reading who do not live in Indiana, we have this archaic system where students have to pay 100 to 200 a semester/year to "rent" their textbooks and devices (laptops whatever). On top of that are the school supply lists from the teachers that usually run at least 100.00 per student and then of course school clothes on top of that. Students who qualify as low income get a pass on the book/device rentals, but not on the school supplies.

 

[Winsome]

For those reading who do not live in Indiana, we have this archaic system where students have to pay 100 to 200 a semester/year to "rent" their textbooks and devices (laptops whatever). On top of that are the school supply lists from the teachers that usually run at least 100.00 per student and then of course school clothes on top of that. Students who qualify as low income get a pass on the book/device rentals, but not on the school supplies.

Per the State child support guidelines, this type of expense for the child(ren) is typically paid by the custodial parent and is not transferred or duplicated. Controlled expenses are items like clothing, education, school books and supplies, ordinary uninsured health care and personal care.
Secondly, the ex earns more than I do. I pay child support as well. Not that this is a criteria for me not paying for the children's fees, I have purchased school supplies for the kids and not asked mother about it.

 

[stealth2]

IMO, your best tack is to contact the providers you are aware of, ask them the total amount paid for your children, then reimburse your share to the ex w/a detailed listing of that info on the online app. Also, arrange with those providers to receive a statement each month (or whatever their billing cycle is) and let them know that you will reimburse them your share directly. Let your ex know that you will handle these activities in this manner moving forward.

 

[LdiJ]

IMO, your best tack is to contact the providers you are aware of, ask them the total amount paid for your children, then reimburse your share to the ex w/a detailed listing of that info on the online app. Also, arrange with those providers to receive a statement each month (or whatever their billing cycle is) and let them know that you will reimburse them your share directly. Let your ex know that you will handle these activities in this manner moving forward.

However, if you do decide to go the route of paying the providers directly, do make sure that you do so in a very timely manner. Otherwise, things just get more complicated.

 

[LdiJ]

Per the State child support guidelines, this type of expense for the child(ren) is typically paid by the custodial parent and is not transferred or duplicated. Controlled expenses are items like clothing, education, school books and supplies, ordinary uninsured health care and personal care.
Secondly, the ex earns more than I do. I pay child support as well. Not that this is a criteria for me not paying for the children's fees, I have purchased school supplies for the kids and not asked mother about it.

I am quite aware of the Indiana guidelines. I just happen to disagree with them when it comes to book/device rental. That is a big chunk of change to come up with when school supplies and school clothes are happening at the same time.

I bought the school supplies for my grandchildren and (kind of) step grandchildren the year before last because that was the only way it was going to happen.