Filing for full custody

[RPS]

What is the name of your state? RI

I have posted previous threads. My case is regarding the mother whom left the state and now we are trying to establish jurisdiction.

A few facts:
Never married the mother, we seperated when the child was 3 months old.
I began a new relationship and now have 3 children w/current girlfriend-been together now for a little over 6 yrs. We had regular visits w/my daughter until a month from her 4th B-day. By regular I mean: weekends and occassionally during the week. She loved us and loved staying with her baby brothers, she now has a sister she doesn't know about. Mother fled w/o warning w/ boyfriend to NY then to FL It took almost 2yrs to find her. Upon finding her in FL we served her to establish home state but RI denied us; a few months later we discovered she was back in RI; where is where the child was born and raised and where myself and the rest of my daughters family lives until her mother took her out of state. Served her in RI w/restraining order not to leave state and received at the last court hearing supervised visits to reunite us because it had been 2yrs. Know it has been 3yrs still haven't seen my daughter She fled back to FL leaving her boyfriend behind here in RI. Know her lawyer whom she got after going back to FL, NO ONE would represent her while she was here because she lies; is trying to go for dismissal on jursidiction. She lived back here in RI for at least 5 1/2 months, had a job, lived w/boyfriend of 3yrs, put child in school and was recieving state assistance for medical.

Question:
At first when she was living here in RI we where just going for visitation. But I would like to file for full custody if the judge decides in my favor for jurisdiction in RI. Can I do this and what are my chances????

 

[bulldogg70]

Respectfully, can you rewrite, there are too many overlapping statements here and I cannot understand the picture. Please think it through so I can get a grasp of all this moving around and jurisdiction, and OOP's, and etc.

 

[casa]

What is the name of your state? RI

I have posted previous threads. My case is regarding the mother whom left the state and now we are trying to establish jurisdiction.

A few facts:
Never married the mother, we seperated when the child was 3 months old.
I began a new relationship and now have 3 children w/current girlfriend-been together now for a little over 6 yrs. We had regular visits w/my daughter until a month from her 4th B-day. By regular I mean: weekends and occassionally during the week. She loved us and loved staying with her baby brothers, she now has a sister she doesn't know about. Mother fled w/o warning w/ boyfriend to NY then to FL It took almost 2yrs to find her. Upon finding her in FL we served her to establish home state but RI denied us; a few months later we discovered she was back in RI; where is where the child was born and raised and where myself and the rest of my daughters family lives until her mother took her out of state. Served her in RI w/restraining order not to leave state and received at the last court hearing supervised visits to reunite us because it had been 2yrs. Know it has been 3yrs still haven't seen my daughter She fled back to FL leaving her boyfriend behind here in RI. Know her lawyer whom she got after going back to FL, NO ONE would represent her while she was here because she lies; is trying to go for dismissal on jursidiction. She lived back here in RI for at least 5 1/2 months, had a job, lived w/boyfriend of 3yrs, put child in school and was recieving state assistance for medical.

Question:
At first when she was living here in RI we where just going for visitation. But I would like to file for full custody if the judge decides in my favor for jurisdiction in RI. Can I do this and what are my chances????

So 3 years ago the X fled the state...Took you 2 years to find her and when you did a judge issued a restraining order to prevent her from leaving the state and gave you visitation to re-establish your relationship- Instead she fled the state again. Correct?

No one knows what a judge will do, but a judge will certainly not be happy about her fleeing the state- Then fleeing again while under an order of restraint not to leave the state with the child. Follow through with the case and file for custody. Even if the judge does not give you physical custody right away, the issue of the mother purposing fleeing and hiding your child from you while under court order not to, will be addressed.

Good Luck and I hope you get to see your daughter again soon.

 

[RPS]

here is a better break down of the situation

Respectfully, can you rewrite, there are too many overlapping statements here and I cannot understand the picture. Please think it through so I can get a grasp of all this moving around and jurisdiction, and OOP's, and etc.

Brief:
She has Lived in:
RI-birth(Jan 1998) - Feb 2002
Ny-Feb2002 - Nov 2003
FL- Nov2003 - Aug 2003
RI- Aug 2003-Feb 2004
Fl-Feb 2004- present

Never married, never any court order other than for me to pay childsupport.
Child born Jan 1998 mother fled w/child in Feb 2002 to NY w/her boyfriend. Had regular visits w/child in my home w/my new girlfriend and our 2 sons at the time, for 4yrs. We now have a 2yr old daughter whom my daughter does not even now about. Found out in feb 2002 she fled to NY found an address late 2002 found out she fled to FL to live w/her parents leaving her boyfriend behind in NY in early 2003. Served her in Fl in april 2003 court date was in june 2003, RI threw the case out based on jurisdiction. In the mix of this I was sending my daughter cards, one was returned the others the mother admitted to me that she received but did not give them to our daughter, this conversation was upon her receipt of being served, it was our first contact since she left RI. She tried telling me to give up my rights and that our daughter calls her boyfriend daddy.

Discovered in Sept 2003 she moved back to RI w/her boyfriend; because he would not move down to FL w/her he came back to RI where his family lives so she followed. Served her in Sept 2003 w/restraining order not to leave state. Had 3 court dates Oct, Nov 2003 and Jan 2004. All continued so she could retain counsel. Her first lawyer refused to represent her because she did not take her advice to stay in FL. This is stated in the court transcripts.
The second lawyer refused to represent her because she lies. In Jan at this court hearing they gave her another chance to gain cousel and awarded me w/ supervised visits to reunite me and my daughter.

She showed up to the first visit w/her boyfriend then refused to let me see her and refused to let me give our daughter the birthday gift that I had brought w/me. All this was documented by the staff at the court.

Went to 2 more visits she was a no show and they could not contact her. Discovered on Feb 9 2004 that she fled to FL again leaving her boyfriend behind. Served her in Feb 2004 w/2 contempt charges one for the restraining order the other for the visitation order. She finally got a lawyer here to represent her. They are trying to state that she was always a resident of FL and RI does not have jurisdiction. Though I recently spoke w/her boyfriend whom is still here in RI living at the same address and found out that they are still together. He wants her to move here she wants him to move to FL. He admits that the reason she came back to RI was to be w/him.

Upon serving her in Feb 2004 w/the charges I received a phone call from her father. I tape recorded the conversation, he threatened me that if I pushed him he would get his biker buddies after me. He is trying to state that she was a resident of FL and she only went to RI to get somethings straightened out. He also stated that I should give up my rights because I have 3 other children. (I told him I won't do that she is not a piece of trash that I can get ride of and forget about. I also asked him if he would do that to his daughters and of course he could not answer) He says they will fight me to the end and I will not win.

Court was in March 2003 and has been continued several times since then to prove discovery. We asked her interrogatories and have subpeaoned several things. Again we know she was living w/her boyfriend, she had a job, put our daughter in school and applied for state medical assistance here in RI.

We have several things to contradict her answers which are mainly lies. She cant tell the truth to save her life.

Recently found out she came back for a week for New years to be w/her boyfriend. Yet again did not contact me.

Court is set for Feb 2, 2005.

I want my daughter to have a stable life and not be moved here there and every where. My family has been settled in our residence for over 5yrs. She has moved 5 times in 3yrs. Our daughter also has Juvenille rheumatiod arthritis. She obviously is not willing to facilitate a relationship w/ myself and our daughter.

 

[KKHeuser]

From what I've read you've worked very hard on securing your case. Her father made a huge mistake threatening you like that. It sure doesn't help her case any. I think you have a great chance of getting custody and I wish you the best.

 

[LdiJ]

I see one possible problem for you....and that is jurisdiction. Technically, I believe that she is a legal resident of Florida, not RI. She wasn't in RI long enough to establish residency. It was close...but not quite close enough. That may give you trouble.

Custody would also be a very tricky issue for you. Although it isn't your fault, you are basically a stranger to your daughter at this point. A judge would be very reluctant to place a child with someone who is basically a stranger to the child. Mom has moved alot, but you don't mention any other reasons that she could be considered unfit....and moving alot, all by itself, generally isn't enough to prove a parent unfit. If she is basically a good mom, despite the moving and keeping the child away from you it could be very traumatic for your daughter to be removed from her custody....and a judge can't ignore that...and neither should you.

 

[RPS]

Thanks for the responses. I know it is a complex issue. But also can't this also be a case of PAS. Based upon the fact she tells her her boyfriend is daddy and that she not only denies contact to me but also to the rest of the family. For instance, my mother our daughters grandmother confronted her on New Years eve last week while she was here and was very pleasant to her and asked if she could see her granddaughter. My ex just ignored the question. My mother asked what they did to her to keep her from them(her grandparents & great grandmother) again all she could say was I don't have your address. (LIE). She kept ignoring the question of seeing her and said we are leaving tomorrow.

 

[LdiJ]

Thanks for the responses. I know it is a complex issue. But also can't this also be a case of PAS. Based upon the fact she tells her her boyfriend is daddy and that she not only denies contact to me but also to the rest of the family. For instance, my mother our daughters grandmother confronted her on New Years eve last week while she was here and was very pleasant to her and asked if she could see her granddaughter. My ex just ignored the question. My mother asked what they did to her to keep her from them(her grandparents & great grandmother) again all she could say was I don't have your address. (LIE). She kept ignoring the question of seeing her and said we are leaving tomorrow.

I don't think that you need to bring PAS into the mix...its controversial, and very difficult and expensive to prove. She also doesn't have any legal obligation to provide visitation to extended family. She only has the obligation to provide it to you...based on existing court orders...which may get voided if RI end up without jurisdiction.

If I were in your shoes I would almost be tempted to dismiss the RI case and simply file for visitation and at least joint legal custody in FL.

 

[casa]

I don't think that you need to bring PAS into the mix...its controversial, and very difficult and expensive to prove. She also doesn't have any legal obligation to provide visitation to extended family. She only has the obligation to provide it to you...based on existing court orders...which may get voided if RI end up without jurisdiction.

If I were in your shoes I would almost be tempted to dismiss the RI case and simply file for visitation and at least joint legal custody in FL.

LdiJ~ I am wondering; Didn't RI at one point assume jurisdiction by issuing an order that the mother was not to leave the state pending a hearing on custody/visitation and ordering some type of reunification visitation schedule for the father?

 

[LdiJ]

LdiJ~ I am wondering; Didn't RI at one point assume jurisdiction by issuing an order that the mother was not to leave the state pending a hearing on custody/visitation and ordering some type of reunification visitation schedule for the father?

Yes, RI did assume jurisdiction however the OP indicated that mom's attorney was challenging RI having jurisdiction. I think there is a chance that that challenge may succeed. I think that FL would consider mother as still a legal resident of FL because she was gone for less than 6 months.

I could be wrong, it may not play out that way. However I do think its possible.

 

[casa]

Yes, RI did assume jurisdiction however the OP indicated that mom's attorney was challenging RI having jurisdiction. I think there is a chance that that challenge may succeed. I think that FL would consider mother as still a legal resident of FL because she was gone for less than 6 months.

I could be wrong, it may not play out that way. However I do think its possible.

Thanks, was curious

 

[RPS]

I won't give up

I will continue in my fight and see which way the judge decides on jurisdiction then base my actions on that. Because there is a chance RI will retain jurisdiction. Yeah she wasn't here for a full 6 months it was about 5 1/2
and she never contested anything in court about what she is trying to state now, that she was only here temporarily; this is just another one of her lies. She intended on residing in RI she applied for state assistance and you have to be a resident to get that and she also refused her 1st lawyers advice of staying in Florida. So we will see I will not give up on my daughter. Not since I have fought thus far. What goes around comes around everyone has there day and I have been waiting 3 yrs now. I will keep you posted on the ruling. Any advice and opinions are welcome.

 

[Sculptor]

One more thing jurisdiction is based on is family ties. I know your ex has parents in Florida, but siblings are taken highly into consideration, as well. In your case, she knew her brothers well.

I suggest going for full custody, to make it well known how much you want your daughter in your life. Because of the fact that she has been with your ex, I agree it would be traumatic to yank her away, BUT, your ex is more likely to be kept in-state should jurisdiction be set in RI.

I do wish you luck, having been through a 2-year jurisdiction battle....

 

[LdiJ]

One more thing jurisdiction is based on is family ties. I know your ex has parents in Florida, but siblings are taken highly into consideration, as well. In your case, she knew her brothers well.

I suggest going for full custody, to make it well known how much you want your daughter in your life. Because of the fact that she has been with your ex, I agree it would be traumatic to yank her away, BUT, your ex is more likely to be kept in-state should jurisdiction be set in RI.

I do wish you luck, having been through a 2-year jurisdiction battle....

Jurisdiction is NOT based on family ties. It is based on legal residency of the parties...more particularly the child. I think you are getting jurisdiction mixed up with move away cases.

 

[RPS]

Jurisdiction???

I know there are other things taken into consideration other than the 6 month rule. Like there is a "clean hands" act where the other state can refuse to take the case based on the fact of the other parent skipping state w/o knowledge of the other parent to get jurisdiction and ruling in a different state.