For Ohiogal,Escape2 and SingleAzdad!

[ray123]

What is the name of your state? Mississippi
I questioned my son today and he confirmed that dad smoked pot with him. I have a mini tape recorder and taped the whole conversation. The reason I did this was because dad has been brainwashing my son for years and likely will try and get my son to change his statement if he finds out. Escape, I could not get the name of the person who was in the room but my son did say that he and dad smoked pot together. I contacted the Local Police Department and filed a report. I was told that a juvenille detective will get back with me immediately. Thank you Escape for your understanding and going to bat for me. Ohio, I'm going to immediately contact my lawyer and see what else I can do. Just because my son admitted to me that he smoked last year doesn't mean dad has not let him smoke recently. Ohio I'm really scared because my son visits with dad this weekend! I will not let him visit with his father knowing that this kind of behavior is going on. I don't care that I'll be in contempt of Court and I'm willing to go to jail to protect my son from that ignorance. What motions should I file? And SingleAzdad you are a complete moron and asinine person. You sound like the kind of person who gets lost in a parking lot or needs directions to get out of a rain storm.

 

[ray123]

Thanks guys

 

[Ohiogal]

After a real quick search (less than five seconds) I found this.

In 1978, Mississippi decriminalized marijuana and in 2004, House Bill 28[39] further decriminalized marijuana by classifying possession of less than 30 grams (1.05 ounces) of marijuana a misdemeanor punishable by a $100 to $250 fine; stricter punishments exist for sale, cultivation, subsequent offenses, or possession in a motor vehicle.[40]

If you keep your son from his father over marijuana you can face LOSING CUSTODY of it. Understand? Marijuana is NOT a major event in Missisippi apparently. While you do not like it, it does not mean that a court will agree with you. There are better ways of dealing with this. A drug evaluation for your son, removing your son from the Garden of Eden, random drug tests for your son. Denying dad parenting time will very likely backfire on you. You NEED to show how the marijuana has NEGATIVELY affected your child. And how dad has contributed to it. You have proof that he did it a year ago. Well what negative attributes can you link directly and solely to the use?

Also see:
http://www.norml.org/index.cfm?wtm_view=&Group_ID=4546\

Oh and by the way the fact that no one responded in the amount of time YOU thought we should, we are VOLUNTEERS! We have lives.

 

[2Mistakes]

OP, as OG has said numerous times -- NEVER go against a court order.

What area of MS are you in? The Coast?

 

[SingleAZdad]

Funny that you took my advice and confronted your son.

 

[ray123]

Ohio, I'm sorry that came across the wrong way. In my first post I wanted to thank you and escape. I just added thanks guys to my next post this morning because I did not think I could edit the post since I entered it last night. I understand what you say about a court order but to what extent do you follow it? Say if I had a daughter and she claimed her father raped her and she has to visit with dad the day I get the news. Any parent in their right mind will not let their child visit with dad! Their had to be limitations to being in Contempt. Ok, my case dad flunked drug test,CONTEMPT, Dad smoked weed with son, CONTEMPT and possibly a felony charge. So let me sit back and figure how it negatively affected my son? Ohio, I greatly respect your opinion regarding court law and motions but you seriously lack common sense! And Single it was Escapes idea not yours to confront my son!

 

[waitinMd]

If it is so urgent, then you file an emergency order ex parte, or call the pro se office and ask them what you should do. You just can't ignore your order. The judge is the one who would cancel visitation until it can be worked out.

I agree giving a child an illegal drug is horrible. I advised talking to the childs school. I know if they get involved and called CPS, it is investigated differently then if you call CPS on the father.

 

[Ohiogal]

Ohio, I'm sorry that came across the wrong way. In my first post I wanted to thank you and escape. I just added thanks guys to my next post this morning because I did not think I could edit the post since I entered it last night.

You can edit a post at any time. INcluding thirty seconds after you post it. That is why I took it as sarcasm.

I understand what you say about a court order but to what extent do you follow it?

You follow it until you have unbiased third party evidence that the child is harmed by said exposure and can march into court for an ex parte suspension of visitation.

Say if I had a daughter and she claimed her father raped her and she has to visit with dad the day I get the news. Any parent in their right mind will not let their child visit with dad!

Any parent in their right mind would be hightailing it to the hospital to get the child examined and the doctor would be reporting it to CSB/CPS.

Their had to be limitations to being in Contempt.

There is limitations to being in contempt.

Ok, my case dad flunked drug test,CONTEMPT,

Did you take him back to court to get his visitation suspended based on the flunked drug test?

Dad smoked weed with son, CONTEMPT and possibly a felony charge.

DId you read the links I posted? And how do you get the idea that dad smoking weed is CONTEMPT? Does your court order specifically address smoking weed?

So let me sit back and figure how it negatively affected my son?

YOU are missing the point. Have his grades deterioriated? Has he been skipping school? Has he been unruly (legal definition)? Has he engaged in criminal activity? If it has negatively affected him you would KNOW it and you would not have to "sit back" and figure it out.

Ohio, I greatly respect your opinion regarding court law and motions but you seriously lack common sense! And Single it was Escapes idea not yours to confront my son!

I am telling you the LAW. Understand? THE LAW. YOU have a court order allowing dad visitation. If you want his visitation suspended then you go to court and you use the tape as evidence. YOu use the failed drug test as evidence. End of story. But you do not just disobey the court order. You motion to have it changed.

The fact that you want to attack my common sense is ridiculous by the way. You have no clue my personal thoughts on this subject. You have no clue what I think personally. What you know is what I am telling you based on the law. Understood?

 

[ray123]

Yes maam I understand. I'm just frustrated so forgive me for venting towards you Ohio. Thank you for your advice and I apologize for insulting you. To answer a few of your questions this last 9 weeks he has 2 F's and 1 D. He was caught drinking and having sex by a friends house, and got caught cheating. His entire life I warned him about using drugs, drinking alcohol and having sex. I've tried to educate him on those issues the best I can. I've been protective of him but not to the point of being over protective. I monitor his friends and make sure he goes were he is suppose to go. I can't explain his recent behavior for the life of me. He seems like a different person sometimes especially when he comes back from his fathers house but after a few days he is back to his old self. Court Order does state about not using illegal drugs or having them in my son's presence.

 

[Ohiogal]

Yes maam I understand. I'm just frustrated so forgive me for venting towards you Ohio. Thank you for your advice and I apologize for insulting you. To answer a few of your questions this last 9 weeks he has 2 F's and 1 D. He was caught drinking and having sex by a friends house, and got caught cheating. His entire life I warned him about using drugs, drinking alcohol and having sex. I've tried to educate him on those issues the best I can. I've been protective of him but not to the point of being over protective. I monitor his friends and make sure he goes were he is suppose to go. I can't explain his recent behavior for the life of me. He seems like a different person sometimes especially when he comes back from his fathers house but after a few days he is back to his old self. Court Order does state about not using illegal drugs or having them in my son's presence.

Then here is what you do:
Start drug testing son.
If he tests positive, remove him from the garden of eden (TM) -- which means you basically remove EVERYTHING from his bedroom by his mattress and clothes. That is where he will live, breathe and work.
Get a drug evaluation done on junior and get him into rehab/drug and alcohol counseling.
Take him to the doctor and get him tested for every STD known to man.

Also: You file a motion to show cause against dad to have him found in contempt for drug use and what not.
Also: You file a motion to modify visitation with dad due to the issues present in the contempt.

The grades, sex and alcohol can backfire however because YOU are the Primary Residential parent correct? Hence dad will have a strong case to show that the majority of the problems are due to you due to the amount of time junior is with you.

 

[CourtClerk]

which means you basically remove EVERYTHING from his bedroom by his mattress and clothes

I actually did this to my big one for something else (not drugs), I actually only left him with 3 sets of clothes... and he could wash those when they got dirty. I wasn't required to furnish him with a closet full of clothes and shoes, but required to make sure the ones he had were clean. So he had 3 sets...

 

[Humusluvr]

If he tests positive, remove him from the garden of eden (TM) -- which means you basically remove EVERYTHING from his bedroom by his mattress and clothes. That is where he will live, breathe and work.

I saw this on Nanny 911 once.... worked like a charm...

I saw a Dr. Phil once where the little 12 year old was out taking pictures naked of herself and sending them to boys on her cellphone. and I thought, "Why in the hel! does this 12 year old still have a phone? Why are the parents letting this kid dictate what she is gonna do? Take her Abercrombie and send her to school in a potato sack. Then she can take pictures of THAT."

You can take bback control at any age, but its better if you never lost it in the first place. IMHO.

 

[ray123]

Would it be possible to press criminal charges on dad?

 

[waitinMd]

Also: You file a motion to show cause against dad to have him found in contempt for drug use and what not.
Also: You file a motion to modify visitation with dad due to the issues present in the contempt.

you're not listening....

let the judge worry about criminal charges....

 

[Ohiogal]

Would it be possible to press criminal charges on dad?

YOu could file a complaint but YOU can NOT press charges. Do the other things you were told to do if this is about your child and not about revenge.