grandparents rights?

[ecmst12]

Also, you will not be able to get a restraining order unless you have proof of danger. If she's never actually threatened or harmed anyone, then you have nothing. You have the right to stay away from her and keep your child away from her.

 

[single317dad]

But she does not WANT to search only this site. She wants to search the whole web to find info on the case.

Very well then.

Troxel Wisconsin -site:freeadvice.com will search the entirety of the internet minus freeadvice.com

Might want to throw "Yoder" in there as well.

 

[Ninariki]

This thread is fine. Don't post duplicates.

I didn't post duplicates... I figured if it was interfering that a forum moderator/administrator would move it to where it needed to be.

I did make a second one concerning getting a restraining order, but it was not a duplicate. Is that why that one was eaten? Or is there some weird forum thread eating bug?

Also, you will not be able to get a restraining order unless you have proof of danger. If she's never actually threatened or harmed anyone, then you have nothing. You have the right to stay away from her and keep your child away from her.

Wish I had thought to check here before re-doing my other thread. >< Hope I didn't mess things up. I thought I was asking something completely different...

 

[ecmst12]

Keep all questions about the same situation in THIS thread.

 

[Ninariki]

Keep all questions about the same situation in THIS thread.

Do you want me to re-ask the restraining order part here? I'm sorry, I didn't realize I had done something wrong ><

 

[Proserpina]

Do you want me to re-ask the restraining order part here? I'm sorry, I didn't realize I had done something wrong ><

(The "preview" function is what eats your posts. Don't use it, lest you keep feeding the hunger )

 

[ecmst12]

No I reported the post because it was a duplicate. She didn't do anything wrong other than not seeing me ask her to keep all the questions here.

 

[Ninariki]

No I reported the post because it was a duplicate. She didn't do anything wrong other than not seeing me ask her to keep all the questions here.

I edited the original post. Sorry again

How different does a question have to be? I mean, I thought I was asking something completely different. Usually forums want you to keep stuff more organized so people can find things when they search through them.

 

[ecmst12]

Same kids, same grandparent, same situation, one thread.

 

[Just Blue]

Yes, both of us (parents) are still alive and still married and are in a healthy relationship. No, the kids are not adopted. No, she has not had that type of relationship with them, she sees them maybe once every 6 weeks, and when we were living closer, it was maybe once a week. However, couldn't she just lie about that? (my mother is a special kind of crazy...) And if she does, what can I do? I want to be prepared for the worst, she might not do anything, but it would not surprise me if she did this.

I have to ask...Why would you ever take your children to visit "special kind of crazy" once a week, once every 6 weeks or...ever? What was the point??

 

[Ninariki]

I have to ask...Why would you ever take your children to visit "special kind of crazy" once a week, once every 6 weeks or...ever? What was the point??

I didn't know I 'could' have no contact with her. If I could show you how I was raised, I would. I guess the only way I can put it to help you understand is it is a lot like stockholm syndrome. I was raised by her, and conditioned by her to always think that I was bad, horrible, awful, and she could never be wrong. It has been 8 years since I was kicked out, and the last 2 have been spent away from her lies and manipulation. I think this is why I can finally see her for what she really is. I was one very screwed up little girl at the time I was kicked out...

Recently, she started an argument that I was definitely not in the wrong about. I think it was when she called everyone and their mother and pulled her usual "my daughter is awful, please feel bad for me" crap that I snapped and realized it was NOT me. That she was wrong, and worse yet she had just tried to isolate me and have everyone else verbally beat me back into submission...only this time I have people that DO care about me, my in laws.

I have NOT brought any of what she did up to her. In the past if I remembered something, and asked about it, I got the "you must have a really good imagination, or that was SO long ago, why would you even bring it up" SO it would do absolutely no good to bring it up, because in her twisted mind, she has denied it until it didn't happen...I mean she IS perfect right?

So, I guess to answer your question, I didn't really 'see' the special kind of crazy until all this recently happened and I got my eyes opened and started remembering things. I realized all the social problems I had were because of the way I was treated. And I am seeing a therapist for them now to see if I can do anything to work on them.

Right now, I am trying to think of things that she might do and prepare myself for them as best as I can.

 

[Just Blue]

I didn't know I 'could' have no contact with her. If I could show you how I was raised, I would. I guess the only way I can put it to help you understand is it is a lot like stockholm syndrome. I was raised by her, and conditioned by her to always think that I was bad, horrible, awful, and she could never be wrong. It has been 8 years since I was kicked out, and the last 2 have been spent away from her lies and manipulation. I think this is why I can finally see her for what she really is. I was one very screwed up little girl at the time I was kicked out...

Recently, she started an argument that I was definitely not in the wrong about. I think it was when she called everyone and their mother and pulled her usual "my daughter is awful, please feel bad for me" crap that I snapped and realized it was NOT me. That she was wrong, and worse yet she had just tried to isolate me and have everyone else verbally beat me back into submission...only this time I have people that DO care about me, my in laws.

I have NOT brought any of what she did up to her. In the past if I remembered something, and asked about it, I got the "you must have a really good imagination, or that was SO long ago, why would you even bring it up" SO it would do absolutely no good to bring it up, because in her twisted mind, she has denied it until it didn't happen...I mean she IS perfect right?

So, I guess to answer your question, I didn't really 'see' the special kind of crazy until all this recently happened and I got my eyes opened and started remembering things. I realized all the social problems I had were because of the way I was treated. And I am seeing a therapist for them now to see if I can do anything to work on them.

Right now, I am trying to think of things that she might do and prepare myself for them as best as I can.

How old are you? How old are your children?

 

[Ninariki]

How old are you? How old are your children?

don't you know it's rude to...

26

kids are 5 and 3

 

[Just Blue]

don't you know it's rude to...

26

kids are 5 and 3

I am 48. There. You know my advanced age. lol.

By the time you first child was born you SHOULD have known to not expose said child to "special crazy". If, for whatever reason, by the time Jr.#2 was born, you didn't, you do now.

 

[Ninariki]

I am 48. There. You know my advanced age. lol.

By the time you first child was born you SHOULD have known to not expose said child to "special crazy". If, for whatever reason, by the time Jr.#2 was born, you didn't, you do now.

If I had known then what I know now, I would have kept them away from her. As it is she has NEVER had unsupervised time with either child. Being away from her has allowed me to get some self confidence and to really see how bad she is. It is so easy for someone on the outside looking in to automatically see something is wrong. It is different, however, when you are raised and conditioned to the way she wants. "You don't know what you're missing if you never had it to begin with." In this case I didn't know I was missing having a loving mom. I thought all moms were this way and that I really was a bad child. It is a hard thing to come back from being constantly put down, told you're stupid, bad, worthless, and awful, as far back as I can remember (age 5-6.) It took me a long time, and now I am doing something about it.

I could spend all day attempting to explain this to you, but in the end, would you ever truly understand? The point is I am trying to make things right now. And I am asking for help. I would just call and talk to someone, but those incredibly bad social skills would pop up again. Typing is much easier for me to get what I need to say out there. I've added a couple questions to the original post if you haven't seen them already.

I have no issues trying to help you to understand me more if you would like, but I really would like some help as well.