I read the follow up story and I don't see anything that changes my opinion. I'm glad they finally sat down and talked, but wouldn't it have been far better if they had had a few of those conversations before he went postal?
He still sounds like a garden variety passive-aggressive father. (I'm partly sensitive to it because my daughter has a friend whose father is exactly like this dad).
And I don't believe for a minute that the daughter was completely OK with the situation. I'll bet her friends would tell you a different story. She may simply have learned that Dad can be violent and is not going to be completely straight with her responses to him.
I saw the video the first day it went viral and immediately began reading up on it. More than anything, the thing that initially bothered me was Dad used an expletive toward his child in a punishment about disrepect that included expletives. However, Dad did later apologize and admit he was wrong about that.
In my further reading, I've come to believe he did absolutely the right things for his parenting situation.
There had been talks when she created a Facebook account, talks about the boundaries and limits, etc. She violated those, lost her facebook and internet for 3 months over something more minor. Then there was a lengthy talk when she got the account back about what was expected. I think he even mentioned that upon the return of her facebook it was explained that she was to regain trust and that the penalties for such acts on her second chance were going to be much more severe. And yes, he had told her at that time that he would put a bullet in the laptop if it happened again.
So, from that standpoint, I agree with Dad that following through on consequences is important to discipline. I would not have taken the actions Dad did, but I don't live their relationship. I know from where I live locally where virtually every household has at least one gun that the reaction is a lot less severe than in areas where guns are not so prevelant. I do believe that personal opinions and views on guns greatly influence the opinion of Dad's discipline.
Next, while the video doesn't make it clear, all the follow up does that Dad may be an IT expert but how she was caught was a teenager thinking she was more clever than everyone else. Teen made the rant and marked it private to everyone in her family and church groups on facebook. Problem was she never add the family's dog's page to either of those groups. Dad logged in as the dog to upload a caption to the dog's pic and there was the whole rant front and center. It wasn't spyware or any invasion of privacy and that alone really influences my opinion of the punishment.
The post was extremely disrespectful. If I understood correctly, the "cleaning lady" was a hard working individual who traded out services. The teen was waaaay out of line to disparage her. So, it becomes clear to me that this teen doesn't just have a problem with her parents and the dynamic of their relationship but it extends out further.
I am an extremely laid back, liberal parent who does not generally believe in physical discipline at all (son had one swipe to the rear when he was in diapers). BUT son completely understands that disrespect of persons results in the harshest punishments including the option of physical discipline.
It hits closer to home re: the cleaning lady because my husband has 3 or 4 individuals that he trades out services with on a semi regular basis. These individuals don't have money for their needed service but are hard workers and my husband always finds something around the house for them to do. I would be very disappointed and upset if son ever referred to any of these men as "the hired help." Son is taught to treat these individuals with the same respect as any other client who might ever come into the office.
The teen's post screamed entitlement. As a female, her chores were minimal and she was extremely exaggerating that the small amount of chores made her so tired she had to go to bed at 10 p.m. Doing her own laundry, making her bed and changing the guest bed linen's once a month became doint laundry and beds for the whole house - gross exaggeration.
I will admit that she hit on one of my pet peeves - "doing dishes" is NOT emtying a dishwasher. I grew up doing dishes and it involved actually washing, drying and putting away dishes, not emptying a clean dishwasher. I was the dishwasher
As for shooting the computer versus selling it or giving it away to charity. Ultimately, with all the large offers the family has received to purchase same, this teen is going to end up with a very nice college fund.
To me, that's the bigger argument with viral videos of kids doing cute things or, in cases like this involving a minor being disciplined - do we need federal laws to regulate the money made due to this minors and if it's acceptable for their parents to make them public persons?
