Rights to first child terminated; now have new child. HELP!!

[THE PRACTICE-36]

I applaud both you and mom for getting the necessary treatment to overcome your addictions. That is a very positive step and I hope that both of you are able to have a permanent recovery.

It wasn't a good idea to have a baby so soon into your recovery programs. The reality of things is that the methadone wasn't healthy for the baby and the baby is going to have issues to deal with as a result. That is why you are getting slammed. Plus, mom had to have gotten pregnant within months of beginning treatment.....and that isn't a good sign for permanent recovery.

What the two of you need now is a VERY good attorney....or you need to leave mom and petition for custody of your child. At the very least you need to get a consult with an attorney. You really are at risk of losing your child....therefore you have to put the best interest of the child first.

My response:

An attorney? Oh, please LdiJ - - sometimes your sympathies are misplaced and displaced. These people are Black street people, who can't afford a pot to piss in, let alone an attorney. You need to understand what Bellevue Hospital is. It's a hospital for indigents. It's best known for treating New York's "crazies" and "druggies." The Black woman in this story is a druggie who, undoubtedly, traded sex for drugs. The baby was probably no more than 3 pounds at birth, and probably a lot less.

These are street people who would probably love a brand new refrigerator box. There is no chance in hell, if the baby survives, that either will see this child, let alone have any sort of custody.

Our writer is lucky he's off the hook - - and so is she. The people of New York will care and pay for the child - - again, if it survives. But, there is more than probably no chance for an adoption because the baby is also, more than probably, missing a limb or is mentally retarded. It will remain a Ward of the State and County for as long as it lives.

Thank you so much natsteel.


IAAL

 

[shell007]

My response:

An attorney? Oh, please LdiJ - - sometimes your sympathies are misplaced and displaced. These people are Black street people, who can't afford a pot to piss in, let alone an attorney. You need to understand what Bellevue Hospital is. It's a hospital for indigents. It's best known for treating New York's "crazies" and "druggies." The Black woman in this story is a druggie who, undoubtedly, traded sex for drugs. The baby was probably no more than 3 pounds at birth, and probably a lot less.

These are street people who would probably love a brand new refrigerator box. There is no chance in hell, if the baby survives, that either will see this child, let alone have any sort of custody.

Our writer is lucky he's off the hook - - and so is she. The people of New York will care and pay for the child - - again, if it survives. But, there is more than probably no chance for an adoption because the baby is also, more than probably, missing a limb or is mentally retarded. It will remain a Ward of the State and County for as long as it lives.

Thank you so much natsteel.


IAAL

WOW!!! That ought to do it!

 

[LdiJ]

Junkies will tell them selves anything to justify their actions...I bet she popped her methadone pill and told herself she was doing Jr. a favor...after all...at least she wasn't shooting heroin...And I am sure both of the other children were born addicted...

I am sure that they were as well....or if not, they suffered from a mom who developed the addiction later. Its awful, its horrible....my ex's cousin is a heroine addict so I know it first hand. As a result I really do applaud the parents for getting treatment for the addiction. They have also lasted longer in recovery than statistics generally indicate....which is positive.

However....I agree that the baby should not have been subjected to methadone....yet, at the same time I don't think it automatically means that they should not be able to raise their child. They are in recovery and apparently doing well at this point. They deserve a chance....a monitored and controlled chance...but a chance.

 

[casa]

I am sure that they were as well....or if not, they suffered from a mom who developed the addiction later. Its awful, its horrible....my ex's cousin is a heroine addict so I know it first hand. As a result I really do applaud the parents for getting treatment for the addiction. They have also lasted longer in recovery than statistics generally indicate....which is positive.

However....I agree that the baby should not have been subjected to methadone....yet, at the same time I don't think it automatically means that they should not be able to raise their child. They are in recovery and apparently doing well at this point. They deserve a chance....a monitored and controlled chance...but a chance.

And you know LdiJ that Heroine addicts have a low rate of recovery and an extremely high rate of OD, relapse & death.

Another poster mentioned the Mom using "Meth"...this Mom used heroine or she wouldn't be in methadone treatment.

I question several of the OPs statements~ Not the least of which is over a year on methadone treatment

To natsteel: Hire an attorney and hope they can provide the exact statutes re; NY "allowing" pregnant mothers to use methadone with no consequences....and in the end your best bet is STILL to leave Mom and fight like heck for this child- and focus on repairing both of your lives.

 

[THE PRACTICE-36]

I am sure that they were as well....or if not, they suffered from a mom who developed the addiction later. Its awful, its horrible....my ex's cousin is a heroine addict so I know it first hand. As a result I really do applaud the parents for getting treatment for the addiction. They have also lasted longer in recovery than statistics generally indicate....which is positive.

However....I agree that the baby should not have been subjected to methadone....yet, at the same time I don't think it automatically means that they should not be able to raise their child. They are in recovery and apparently doing well at this point. They deserve a chance....a monitored and controlled chance...but a chance.

My response:

You are an insufferable optimist. A chance? The woman has already lost one child to "the system." They are both druggies. Why should any child be raised in Brooklyn squaller on a sidewalk? Have you seen the public housing tenements? If you have, then you surely wouldn't want any child in that environment. You may as well live in a box on the sidewalk. No, LdiJ, the child is better off with the State and County.

She should be sterilized.

IAAL

 

[LdiJ]

And you know LdiJ that Heroine addicts have a low rate of recovery and an extremely high rate of OD, relapse & death.

Yes, I know that very well.

Another poster mentioned the Mom using "Meth"...this Mom used heroine or she wouldn't be in methadone treatment.

Yes...I agree 100%

I question several of the OPs statements~ Not the least of which is over a year on methadone treatment

I don't question that because the paper trail is too rigid.

To natsteel: Hire an attorney and hope they can provide the exact statutes re; NY "allowing" pregnant mothers to use methadone with no consequences....and in the end your best bet is STILL to leave Mom and fight like heck for this child- and focus on repairing both of your lives.

I agree 100%

 

[shell007]

From what I've heard....meth. addicts are self-absorbed.

This OP won't understand what we are saying no matter how many times we type it, or how many languages we type it in.

I guess I should have said "drug addicts", not meth addicts. My ooops!!

However...not much of a real difference in my mind.

 

[Just Blue]

And you know Lid that Heroine addicts have a low rate of recovery and an extremely high rate of OD, relapse & death.

Another poster mentioned the Mom using "Meth"...this Mom used heroine or she wouldn't be in methadone treatment.
I question several of the Ops statements~ Not the least of which is over a year on methadone treatment:roll eyes:

To Nestle: Hire an attorney and hope they can provide the exact statutes re; NY "allowing" pregnant mothers to use methadone with no consequences....and in the end your best bet is STILL to leave Mom and fight like heck for this child- and focus on repairing both of your lives.

I think Shell was thinking me th was short for methadone...not realizing it was short for methamphetamine....

Chances are this OP and the mother of the child will relapse...they should not be raising a baby...it is very stressful for mothers of the year to care for a newborn, never mind an addict...

 

[shell007]

I think Shell was thinking me th was short for methadone...not realizing it was short for methamphetamine....

Chances are this OP and the mother of the child will relapse...they should not be raising a baby...it is very stressful for mothers of the year to care for a newborn, never mind an addict...

Your right Bay, I admit my thoughts got snagged as soon as I heard the word Meth...!!!

 

[LdiJ]

My response:

An attorney? Oh, please LdiJ - - sometimes your sympathies are misplaced and displaced. These people are Black street people, who can't afford a pot to piss in, let alone an attorney. You need to understand what Bellevue Hospital is. It's a hospital for indigents. It's best known for treating New York's "crazies" and "druggies." The Black woman in this story is a druggie who, undoubtedly, traded sex for drugs. The baby was probably no more than 3 pounds at birth, and probably a lot less.

These are street people who would probably love a brand new refrigerator box. There is no chance in hell, if the baby survives, that either will see this child, let alone have any sort of custody.

Our writer is lucky he's off the hook - - and so is she. The people of New York will care and pay for the child - - again, if it survives. But, there is more than probably no chance for an adoption because the baby is also, more than probably, missing a limb or is mentally retarded. It will remain a Ward of the State and County for as long as it lives.

Thank you so much natsteel.


IAAL

Heroine isn't a drug that has anything to do with race, or gender either. My ex's cousin is an upper class white boy...who comes from money and prestige. The heroine is going to kill him...there is no doubt about it because he has never lasted in recovery more than 6 months. In fact, this time around I doubt he will last a year....which is really sad because when the drug doesn't overcome him he is a sweet and loving human being.

However....there is a rare handful of people who have been able to recover from heroine addiction....they deserve a chance in a monitored and controlled atmosphere. Sometimes love of their children is the one thing that makes them recover.

I suspect that the dad in this case has a far greater chance of recovery than mom....two years is MAJOR in the life of a heroine addict.

 

[casa]

Heroine isn't a drug that has anything to do with race, or gender either. My ex's cousin is an upper class white boy...who comes from money and prestige. The heroine is going to kill him...there is no doubt about it because he has never lasted in recovery more than 6 months. In fact, this time around I doubt he will last a year....which is really sad because when the drug doesn't overcome him he is a sweet and loving human being.

However....there is a rare handful of people who have been able to recover from heroine addiction....they deserve a chance in a monitored and controlled atmosphere. Sometimes love of their children is the one thing that makes them recover.

I suspect that the dad in this case has a far greater chance of recovery than mom....two years is MAJOR in the life of a heroine addict.

I completely agree.

 

[AHA]

Although TWO previous babies did not make her straighten up her life, what are the chances baby # 3 will?

edit:
Of course there is always hope, but still.

 

[casa]

Although TWO previous babies did not make her straighten up her life, what are the chances baby # 3 will?

edit:
Of course there is always hope, but still.

I (and I think LdiJ is as well) are referring to the DAD. He's got 2 years sober and has never had any children taken from him. I think the only 'chance' in this situation is if Dad dumps Mom and moves on with his new life with the baby.

 

[THE PRACTICE-36]

Heroine isn't a drug that has anything to do with race, or gender either.

My response:

I never said it did. But, you can tell from good ol' Nat's writings that he's an indigent Black.

You want the baby to have a chance? Then keep the kid away from druggie "street people", including Nat and the Black woman who has already lost one child, and who was high during the pregnancy of this one. Nat can't afford piss, let alone a child.

Give me ONE good reason why this child shouldn't be raised in the "system."

IAAL

 

[AHA]

I (and I think LdiJ is as well) are referring to the DAD. He's got 2 years sober and has never had any children taken from him. I think the only 'chance' in this situation is if Dad dumps Mom and moves on with his new life with the baby.

I wasn't replying to anyone (no quoting in my post), just stating the fact that having a kid usually makes people change their life, but in this case, mom has already had 2 kids that didn't make her improve her life, so chances might be that the third kid won't have an effect either.
But if dad is clear, in every way, of any type of drugs, then obviously he would be proving to be the "better" parent.