Toys going into neighbors yard and pool

[ccc0429]

Hi, I have a question about adding a net to and above our privacy fence, due to our two toddlers throwing things over the fence into ouir neighbors yard. First, about a year ago, it was bubbles and m&'s. I punished the older kids, and they personally apologized, along with making them stay to clean the pool and whatever else they wanted them to clean. Now, with the toddlers, it has been a hassle keeping them from throwing things over. They do not do it internationally and I have apologized and told them they may throw it away if they prefer not to toss the items back. As for yesterday, it happened to be clumps of clay from the ground, into the their pool, which covers 2/3's of their yard, directly behind our fence. Again, not intentional, and I apologized. Before I could offer to clean it myself, they turned it into an attack on my lack of parenting and not controlling my children. The conversation quickly turned into a verbal attack, in which I turned and walked away. They then called the sheriffs department. The officers laughed when finding out it was the youngest ones, and said it wasn't a big deal.
Now, I do take full responsibility for my children's behavior and am working hard to teach them that throwing in our back yard is not allowed, and also willing to cover any damages that may come from it and clean up whatever they make a mess of. But, the neighbor doesn't seem to care much, and also told the officers something about my lack of tending to children and living conditions, which they quickly dismissed after spending some time in our home and meeting our children.
I have yet to find a solution to fix this without moving or winding up in a civil suit. I'm sick of hearing them yell and talk trash about my family, simply because they refuse to just be kind and say "Hey, come get your crap and clean our pool."
Can I add a net? I can't find that answer anywhere and have no clue who to call on what the law is on fences in subdivisions. Thanks for any help and/or advice!!

 

[quincy]

Hi, I have a question about adding a net to and above our privacy fence, due to our two toddlers throwing things over the fence into ouir neighbors yard. First, about a year ago, it was bubbles and m&'s. I punished the older kids, and they personally apologized, along with making them stay to clean the pool and whatever else they wanted them to clean. Now, with the toddlers, it has been a hassle keeping them from throwing things over. They do not do it internationally and I have apologized and told them they may throw it away if they prefer not to toss the items back. As for yesterday, it happened to be clumps of clay from the ground, into the their pool, which covers 2/3's of their yard, directly behind our fence. Again, not intentional, and I apologized. Before I could offer to clean it myself, they turned it into an attack on my lack of parenting and not controlling my children. The conversation quickly turned into a verbal attack, in which I turned and walked away. They then called the sheriffs department. The officers laughed when finding out it was the youngest ones, and said it wasn't a big deal.
Now, I do take full responsibility for my children's behavior and am working hard to teach them that throwing in our back yard is not allowed, and also willing to cover any damages that may come from it and clean up whatever they make a mess of. But, the neighbor doesn't seem to care much, and also told the officers something about my lack of tending to children and living conditions, which they quickly dismissed after spending some time in our home and meeting our children.
I have yet to find a solution to fix this without moving or winding up in a civil suit. I'm sick of hearing them yell and talk trash about my family, simply because they refuse to just be kind and say "Hey, come get your crap and clean our pool."
Can I add a net? I can't find that answer anywhere and have no clue who to call on what the law is on fences in subdivisions. Thanks for any help and/or advice!!

What is the name of your state?

Where are you when your children are tossing stuff over the fence into your neighbor's yard?

 

[LdiJ]

What is the name of your state?

Where are you when your children are tossing stuff over the fence into your neighbor's yard?

I had the same question. If toddlers cannot be trusted not to throw things over the fence, then toddlers should not be in the back yard without adult supervision.

 

[ccc0429]

Louisiana.
And clearly, they can not be trusted. It's a phase that has started a few months ago and have yet to squash. These are the same two that think it's funny to rise their toothbrush in the toilet. Their toddlers.
I am in the yard with them most of the time. My eldest may be out with them on the swing or trampoline, or their father, who I know doesn't watch them as well. Yet, we have 5 children. It's liberally impossible from keeping them out of the back yard. Does anyone know if it's allowed, to put a net over the fence line (attached, of course)?

 

[justalayman]

The neighbors are 100% correct. There is an atrocious lack of parenting on your part. Your continued "it wasn't intentional" is absolute BS. Your children know exactly what they are doing and your blindness is appalling.

Teach your children some manners and discipline now before it's too late. Stop making excuses for your children. Stop blaming others (the neighbors in this case) for not laughing off the continued and atrocious acts of your children.

in other worrs; wake up and smell the coffee. This is not you having bad neighbors as you suggest. It is they that have the bad neighbors.

 

[justalayman]

As to putting up a net;


Who owns the fence?

If the neighbors or it's shared it's a no go without their permission

Other than that you would have to check with the local municipality to see if there are any ordinances prohibiting such a construct

 

[ccc0429]

The neighbors are 100% correct. There is an atrocious lack of parenting on your part. Your continued "it wasn't intentional" is absolute BS. Your children know exactly what they are doing and your blindness is appalling.

Teach your children some manners and discipline now before it's too late. Stop making excuses for your children. Stop blaming others (the neighbors in this case) for not laughing off the continued and atrocious acts of your children.

in other worrs; wake up and smell the coffee. This is not you having bad neighbors as you suggest. It is they that have the bad neighbors.

You dear, are a nasty person. I have not blamed a soul for this. I described very little details in the matter. You know nothing about me, nor my family. To say that I should teach them some manners and punish before it is too late, is the atrocious part. I even said myself that I have been doing such and my children are best mannered I have ever met! The fact that a 1 and 2 year old occasionally throw their hat and balls in the air, is no lack of parenting! Our yard is wide and narrow, thus the toys easily making it over the fence.
I came here looking for advice and a solution to fix the problem, not to be belittled, yet again. It has been difficult to teach them that their not allowed to throw things in the air. They don't do it out maliouc and I don't just sit back and let it happen. It hasn't been a long drawn out ordeal. They have not once come to me to say "hello, welcome to the neighborhood, your boys are throwing toys over the fence.." Where I come from, you talk to people with respect and get it in return. That, is the only thing I have said that they were wrong for. AND, the comments to the authorities, who themselves even said was rubbish and wrong of them to make up things to cause more trouble because I didn't fight back when they were looking for it. If you don't have any parent to parent, kind words and advice, then move along. Thanks and have a great day!

 

[ccc0429]

As to putting up a net;


Who owns the fence?

If the neighbors or it's shared it's a no go without their permission

Other than that you would have to check with the local municipality to see if there are any ordinances prohibiting such a construct

Thank you! I haven't even thought about the fence belonging to one or the other. I believe it is a shared fence in this case, so the net I am sure it out. But thank you and I'll see what I can find out through the municipality.

 

[Just Blue]

You dear, are a nasty person. I have not blamed a soul for this. I described very little details in the matter. You know nothing about me, nor my family. To say that I should teach them some manners and punish before it is too late, is the atrocious part. I even said myself that I have been doing such and my children are best mannered I have ever met! The fact that a 1 and 2 year old occasionally throw their hat and balls in the air, is no lack of parenting! Our yard is wide and narrow, thus the toys easily making it over the fence.
I came here looking for advice and a solution to fix the problem, not to be belittled, yet again. It has been difficult to teach them that their not allowed to throw things in the air. They don't do it out maliouc and I don't just sit back and let it happen. It hasn't been a long drawn out ordeal. They have not once come to me to say "hello, welcome to the neighborhood, your boys are throwing toys over the fence.." Where I come from, you talk to people with respect and get it in return. That, is the only thing I have said that they were wrong for. AND, the comments to the authorities, who themselves even said was rubbish and wrong of them to make up things to cause more trouble because I didn't fight back when they were looking for it. If you don't have any parent to parent, kind words and advice, then move along. Thanks and have a great day!

No. You dear, are an ineffective parent. You knowingly leave toddlers with poor supervision.

Signed me,

Mom of two well behaved children.

 

[quincy]

Thank you! I haven't even thought about the fence belonging to one or the other. I believe it is a shared fence in this case, so the net I am sure it out. But thank you and I'll see what I can find out through the municipality.

If you find that the net attached to the fence is not a workable solution, perhaps you could put the net over your children.

 

[Just Blue]

If you find that the net attached to the fence is not a workable solution, perhaps you could put the net over your children.

Loving it.....

Also a little swat on the A$$ might be helpful...IMHO.

 

[LdiJ]

Loving it.....

Also a little swat on the A$$ might be helpful...IMHO.

No kidding. One and Two years olds would have to try very hard to get anything like clods of dirt over a fence as it is. It shouldn't be hard to stop them.

 

[Just Blue]

No kidding. One and Two years olds would have to try very hard to get anything like clods of dirt over a fence as it is. It shouldn't be hard to stop them.

I know...Kids must be the new TB12.

 

[FarmerJ]

Blue meanie I very well remember being spanked too decades ago BUT as to the OP find the same kind of giant netting rolls that blueberry pick your own farms use to keep birds from eating up their crops.

 

[Just Blue]

Blue meanie I very well remember being spanked too decades ago BUT as to the OP find the same kind of giant netting rolls that blueberry pick your own farms use to keep birds from eating up their crops.

A little swat on the bottom for repetitive bad behavior is not overly harsh. And yes...the nets should prevent further toys, candy, balls and clay from hitting the neighbors pool.