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Ladyback1

Senior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Montana

Ex refuses to pay 1/2 of medical expenses.

The kids were on the state funded CHIP program ("medicaid light"), so the amount in question is pretty low. ($3 co-pays for office visits and medications). We're talking he owes me $25. Yes, the final decree and parenting plan states he will pay 1/2 of any out of pocket or copays in regards to medical. He has paid it in the past, prior to Dec. 2010. December 2010 was the last time he chose to exercise his visitation.


Is it worth the time, effort and headache to pursue contempt?

as stated, Ex has not exercised visitation since Dec. 2010. Has not spoke to kids via phone/email in over a year. Children (age 13 and 15) do not want to be around Ex's significant other, Ex believes they should just suck it up and embrace her as their soon to be step-mom.

There is a history of issues w/ Ex, including but not limited to abuse, lying and dangerous behavior.

Just looking for some objectivity....
 


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Ladyback1

Senior Member
ecmst12 said:
In no universe would it be worth going to court over $25.
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Since you are completely objective, I suspect you are 100% correct:o

Unfortunately, I can't make him be a good father or a good person.
I can however, continue to provide for the kids and gently nudge them to be a little more forgiving and accepting of their father (teenagers have such black or white opinions sometimes!)
 
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sandyclaus

Senior Member
Ladyback1 said:
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Montana

Ex refuses to pay 1/2 of medical expenses.

The kids were on the state funded CHIP program ("medicaid light"), so the amount in question is pretty low. ($3 co-pays for office visits and medications). We're talking he owes me $25. Yes, the final decree and parenting plan states he will pay 1/2 of any out of pocket or copays in regards to medical. He has paid it in the past, prior to Dec. 2010. December 2010 was the last time he chose to exercise his visitation.


Is it worth the time, effort and headache to pursue contempt?

as stated, Ex has not exercised visitation since Dec. 2010. Has not spoke to kids via phone/email in over a year. Children (age 13 and 15) do not want to be around Ex's significant other, Ex believes they should just suck it up and embrace her as their soon to be step-mom.

There is a history of issues w/ Ex, including but not limited to abuse, lying and dangerous behavior.

Just looking for some objectivity....
Click to expand...

Over $25??? Are you kidding me?

Darn right, you need some objectivity. And a serious reality check. Just the process of dragging him into court over a mere $25 tells me that this is about making a point and not about the money as it should be.

Eat the $25 and save your time and money for a more worthwhile cause. Leave the legal process to those who really need the relief - you know, the ones whose other parent racks up tens of thousands in child support arrears, and who makes up every excuse they can not to provide even the most basic support for their child?
 
L

Ladyback1

Senior Member
sandyclaus said:
Over $25??? Are you kidding me?

Darn right, you need some objectivity. And a serious reality check. Just the process of dragging him into court over a mere $25 tells me that this is about making a point and not about the money as it should be.

Eat the $25 and save your time and money for a more worthwhile cause. Leave the legal process to those who really need the relief - you know, the ones whose other parent racks up tens of thousands in child support arrears, and who makes up every excuse they can not to provide even the most basic support for their child?
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ummmm....I suspected it wasn't worth the time and effort to begin with. I just wanted to hear it from a completely objective view point.
Please don't assume that he isn't in arrears, or provides anything for the children either. (He has not exercised his visitation rights in almost 3 years, hasn't had any contact with the children--by his own choosing--- in roughly the same time frame! I offered to pay all of his expenses to come see the kids, but he refused citing the fact that since the kids don't like his significant other, he shouldn't subject HER to feeling left out) Fortunately, he's not too far in arrears because the State Child Support Enforcement Div. takes what they can of his unemployment, every two weeks.
I've already eaten the $25, and the $300 for particular high school classes, and whatever else the children NEED!
Judge me if you want, that's fine. But, I was looking for confirmation that ignoring the $25 was the right thing to do, not to get a face full of attitude.
 
stealth2

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Ladyback1 said:
ummmm....I suspected it wasn't worth the time and effort to begin with. I just wanted to hear it from a completely objective view point.
Please don't assume that he isn't in arrears, or provides anything for the children either. (He has not exercised his visitation rights in almost 3 years, hasn't had any contact with the children--by his own choosing--- in roughly the same time frame! I offered to pay all of his expenses to come see the kids, but he refused citing the fact that since the kids don't like his significant other, he shouldn't subject HER to feeling left out) Fortunately, he's not too far in arrears because the State Child Support Enforcement Div. takes what they can of his unemployment, every two weeks.
I've already eaten the $25, and the $300 for particular high school classes, and whatever else the children NEED!
Judge me if you want, that's fine. But, I was looking for confirmation that ignoring the $25 was the right thing to do, not to get a face full of attitude.
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Honestly? If you can't decide that forgetting about the $25 is the right thing to do, I have to question just what kind of guidance you are providing your children on any topic, let alone their relationship with their father.

p.s. The "face full of attitude" is free with the service provided here.
 
stealth2

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
From a Juvenile Law thread:

Ladyback1 said:
Speaking as a parent of a 2 teenagers: I try very hard not to FORBID my kids from seeing any particular friend. What I do try to do is to enforce reasonable "laws": You can see "Joe" at our house, he will need to leave by x time on school nites, and X time on other nites. You can go xxxx, and xxxx, with Joe, but expect your mother or I to do spot checks to make sure you are where you say you are.

Have you spoke to the boy's parents? Perhaps you can reach some sort of communication with them regarding the relationship with your daughter.
I am not saying you have to approve of the relationship, but the more you stomp your feet and pound your chest and "forbid" her to see him, the more she's going to be convinced she HAS to see him.

And, oh yeah----your darling daughter is just as responsible for the clandestine meetings, lying, secrecy as the boy is. Please don't think he is the driving factor in the relationship.
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So, ARE you Mom? Or a SO? Or... who?
 
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